friend taking Ecstasy

LegacyUser

Ok, I went out with a guy, who was one of my best friends. He broke up with me, but I was totally cool about it. We hung out a few days after, like old times+ it was all good. After going out with someone, I always try an remain friends, even if I'm the one who gets dumped. He needed space to come to terms with the whole thing, so I agreed. During those couple of months, he seriously changed. He's dress sense, music tastes etc. We've drifted apart. He's dropped alot of his old friends+ is hanging out with a different crowd. There's a couple of other things also, + I'm concerned that he's on a downward spiral.

The other night, I just found out he was taking ecstasy+was offering pills to another friend of mine. wtf.

A few weeks ago, when he mentioned that he might do E, I reminded him about a heart condition he told me about (nt even supposed to be drinking coke/ coffee)+ he basically told me that it's his life+ suddenly his heart condition is 'nothing'.

I don't know what to do. I know he won't listen to me. It'll just sound like I'm bitching at him.

I'm now going out with a really great guy, who is totally there for me, but I'm still obviously concerned about what to do about my friend+ don't want to be dragging him into my worries too much.

seamus

There's not really a whole lot you can do. You can let him know that you think he's an idiot for doing ecstasy when he's got a heart complaint, but it really is his choice.

Any attempt to go behind his back and tell someone else (his family or even the Gardai) will more than likely just result in you being labelled a meddling bitch, and him continuing on what he's doing.

If you make it clear to him that you won't condone or support this choice, then you can wash you hands of his idiocy. Be there if/when it all goes pear shaped, and he'll realise how good a friend he refused to listen to.

tbh

fair play to you for being concerned, but

whatTOdooooo wrote:

it's his life+.

He won't thank you for interfering, even if you are doing the right thing. Explain to him that you are worried about him, but if he doesn't want to listen, there is nothing you can do. If you think it's very serious, maybe you should talk to his parents.

secret_squirrel

Can you find out if the heart thing is real?

If so talk to him and if he doesnt respond talk to his parents.

Better him hating you for being an interfering bitch, that you living with the whatifs, if he suddenly drops dead.

Who knows he may even thank you for it eventually.

Maybe he is in denial about the heart problem and E is his solution?

pclancy

For a lot of people, pills are a faze that they go mad for a few months and then seem to grow out of. If he's got a heart problem obviosuly theres a lot more danger then normal but if he refuses a heartfelt chat from a concerned friend then I dont know what else you can do really. Hopefully he'll realise that the scag, mood swings, midweek depression and tiny-penis side effects aint worth the buzz in the long run.

Talliesin

It is his life.

You've expressed how you feel about it, he knows your point of view, and if he feels the need to talk to someone that isn't in that scene he knows where you are.

Apart from that, there really isn't anything you can do.

TheMilkyPirate

pclancy wrote:

For a lot of people, pills are a faze that they go mad for a few months and then seem to grow out of. If he's got a heart problem obviosuly theres a lot more danger then normal but if he refuses a heartfelt chat from a concerned friend then I dont know what else you can do really. Hopefully he'll realise that the scag, mood swings, midweek depression and tiny-penis side effects aint worth the buzz in the long run.

On ecstacy?

DamienH

eh yup

dr.bollocko

I dont think you can judge someone for just taking E. If he is taking 10 a night every weekend, or going both barrels with speed, or illustrating that he really obviously is in over his head then yeah, he might need help. But if he, like a lot of us have, is experimenting with drugs for the first time, and you tell him "Oh my god, you're taking a pill, YOU'RE GONNA DIE!" he will probably laugh in your face. Its one of the most interesting cases of moral relativism that I have observed. When you havent taken them they are all bad, if you have taken them, it just becomes a different thing.
There isnt any way that you can influence his behaviour now, except to get him pissed off with you if you bring it up.

Jvizzle

E has a bad name , but the death rate / addicition rate is quite low. Just a few highly publisised cases have given it a name, worse than it deserves.

Evil Phil

^^ What Talliesin said.

It's his life.

There is nothing you can do about this that you haven't already done. Most people using exctasy seem to go through a 6 month thing and then ease up (pardon the pun). To Paraphrase Stephen King: To tell an alcoholic not to drink is like telling a person with diarrhoea not to sh*t. Its the same with all addictions. I'm not saying he's addicted but if he ends up that way there's very little you can do until he himself decides to quit and and asks for help. Even then I'd be careful.

whatTOdooooo wrote:

I'm now going out with a really great guy

Good for you, focus your energy on this guy and let the ex work out his own stuff.

turbot

If you want to help him, then maybe you could buy him an informative book on Amazon all about E; that way you can be supportive, educate him into mitigating potential problems and do so without judging.

SpAcEd OuT

He'll grow out of it, ecstasy gives you some of the best most memorable times of your life but the magic doesnt last long, give him a few months and I doubt he'll still be doing them.

you say hes on a downward spiral
why is this
because I certainly wouldnt consider someone who takes ecstasy every so often on a downward spiral just like I wouldnt consider someone who drinks every so often on a downward spiral

Statistically Ecstasy is A LOT safer than alcohol, but if it is indeed true that he does have a heart problem I would be concerned

However i'd hazard a quess that he knows more about his heart condition than you do

generalmiaow

SpAcEd OuT wrote:

He'll grow out of it, ecstasy gives you some of the best most memorable times of your life but the magic doesnt last long, give him a few months and I doubt he'll still be doing them.

Quite true indeed. The vast majority of people grow out of it very quickly.

Laslo

E is great for a while but the buzz wears off as you become used to them and after a few months, there's just no point anymore. It goes from being a great buzz and quite sociable to just plain drug abuse.

However, anyone who goes and gets rat-arsed every weekend and looks down on people who take E is a hypocrite at best and an ignorant idiot at worst.

Talliesin

After my second in my case.

It's a crap drug.

sonic juice

Gotta let them make their own decisions,they will see the light in their own time

Exon

I don't know if it helps but I know a guy who has a very serious heart condition and pumps the E's/Coke etc out of it with speed and that on an odd occasion, hasn't had any negative effects/killed him, i'm not saying it can't kill ya or anything but it's not as dangerous as you may think.

btw don't tell me how stupid he is, his a fully grown adult so he can do what he likes and it's nothing to do with me, just trying to give ya little peace of mind