Ground Zero

Le Rack

A place where the heart lost its beat
A place where the soul lost its strife
A place where the blood lost its flow
A place where I came close to you.

A place where the moon lost its glow
A place where the sun lost its shine
A place where the stars lost their twinkle
A place where your eye met mine.

A place where the plants lost their growth
A place where the birds lost their flight
A place where the earth lost its axis
A place where you and I began.

Let’s not breath again.

NoDayBut2Day

I like the rhyme scheme in the 2nd stanza.

Doomspell

I really liked that LeRack, great poem, keep it up:)

The_Minister

I liked this, and I rarely like poetry. Well done.

Le Rack

thanks! didn't expect any response at all! cheers!

the rhyme scheme was essentially the same the whole way through but it just has to be read from different views...or summit like that...

shiv

Hey Le Rack, good stuff. Would only change thing: began to begin in the second last line. Like the way it ends too...

Le Rack

Well the whole poem is in the past tense, everything is "lost", so I think begin would look very out of place, thanks v.much though

Dylan_James

Again with the darkness. Smile, you will feel better.