Gf

podge79

what should i do...i'm in love with my best female friend..we're best pals and tell each other everything..just the way things are between us....i'm racked with guilt but dont know what to do..she has a fella but isnt the happiest...dont want to kill a brilliant friendship but how can i go wit some other girl knowing i love her...and thoughts?

JustCoz

I got involved/ am involved with a friend and it's getting very very messy. Just be aware that anything you say will completely change things. Good luck!

cork-langer

Was in that situation 2 years ago. really glad i did'nt make a move, it only complicates things... same girl is still my best mate to this day.
Its a phase, it'll pass.
Friendship is better than a fling.... but then again....

6th

If it works its so worth it, I married my best friend - GO FOR IT!

Be sure its what you want, like langer said it could be a phase.

Black Swan

Difficult call. Then again, your g/f should not just be your lover, but also your best friend, too?;)

Chinafoot

Ordinarily I'd say go for it. However I think the fact that she has a boyfriend at the moment would be reason enough to not say anything - for now at least.

If she is having problems with her boyfriend then you should focus on being her friend first. Be there for her and should they break up maybe then you could tell her how you feel.

It's a poxy situation to be in. Best of luck.

uberpixie

podge79 wrote:

what should i do...i'm in love with my best female friend..we're best pals and tell each other everything..just the way things are between us....i'm racked with guilt but dont know what to do..she has a fella but isnt the happiest...dont want to kill a brilliant friendship but how can i go wit some other girl knowing i love her...and thoughts?

Well you are damned if you do and damned if you don't.

If you try and make a move for her now, you are going to get a lot of back lash. She prob will see this as an attack on her relationship with her fella and will go out of her way to make it work and make herself be happy with him.

She will also, in all likelyhood, get very suspicious of your past friendship with her.
(I.e. were you only friends with her to try and get the leg over and going after her now when you feel she is vulnerable)

I know exactly how you feel, it's a horrible palce to be.

For me, it ended very badly. What friendship we had went straight to hell.

I'm an all or nothing type, I shot for the stars and landed flat on my face. It hurt like hell for a while, but in the long run I felt much better.

All I can offer is, it might me a good idea to keep your mouth shut for a while, Peacypants gave some very good advise.

I know it's hard and I know it hurts, but if you really want to stay as an important part of your friends life, keep your mouth shut.

If you plan on opening it at some stage, best of luck but prepare for the worst.

Ruu_Old

She is in a relationship so you probably shouldn't mess with her at this stage. Stay with friends with her and if something comes up in the future where she is single, and you still feel the same then go ahead and ask her out. Good luck.

Kell

uberpixie wrote:

I'm an all or nothing type, I shot for the stars and landed flat on my face. It hurt like hell for a while, but in the long run I felt much better.

Ditto.

OP- go for it. It will reveal the strength or the weakness of the relationship. Most of all it will remove the crap you are carrying around on your shoulders about does she doesnt she like me.

If it goes well- way hey. If it doesnt, you'll bounce back.

Dont be a backseat driver in your own life. Go live it and deal with the consequence (if any) as they arise.

K-

podge79

thanx everyone it's a tough call