Round 4 Poll

Fysh

Alright, I'm guessing that everyone knows the deal by now.

Check out the entries, pick your favourite, and vote!

Earthhorse

Choosing the winner from this batch of entries was actually quite easy considering the diverse approach taken by the entrants and the high quality of some of the work.

Lucy Riordan's "Freedom From the Ashes" is a succinct, seven panel piece which manages to capture the feeling of freedom, and the disintegration of a relationship, without a hint of heavy handedness. It's a clever interpretation of the theme that manages not to rely on its cleverness to work. In particular, the last three panels practically set each other alight, capturing the feeling of freedom and flight all at once. I voted for this entry.

Oisin Roche's "Flaming Truth" is a brilliant piece that rewards repeated reading. The individual black and white illustrations are breathtaking, with a great deal of imagination and detail on display in every one.

Where Oisin's piece falls short though is in the progression. A comic is meant to tell a story, however simple, and whilst it would be a shame to have the text interfere with the images, heading and footing every quartet with the words doesn't quite work. It's difficult to follow the flow of the piece and I genuinely didn't cop that one man's story was being told until I read the comic for a third time. The lack of attention paid to the layout of the words is in sharp contrast to that lavished on the images and more care needs to be taken next time. And I am only saying this because the images are good enough to demand great care is paid to the words.

Finally, I can't help but pass comment on another ehm...installment...in Stephen Walker's "Hellhunter". We've seen Stephen's work in nearly, if not every, round of the comic challenge and it always impresses. He draws brilliantly and writes well. But the episodic nature of his entries prevents the work from standing on its own. Also, this entry's text is a little difficult to read and more attention could be paid, I feel, to the overall style in use or at least more obvious separations of the styles in use in the comic. Give us some white space to catch our breath before you jump from images of the universe to images of earth. And keep up the good work.

Fysh, the thumbnails on the entry page are coming up as red x's. Not sure if that's preventing people clicking through but I thought you should know.

Well done to all who entered. I appreciate a lot of effort goes into each entry.

Fysh

Gah. Thanks for the headsup Earthhorse, the problem's sorted now.

Briony Noh

Just wanted to say thanks to Earthhorse, always worth reading a commentary that's been thought over. I agree with what you said about Lucy's entry (she also got my vote) and thank you for what you said about mine. I'm thinking about the "white space" thing, and I can see where you're coming from.

I hope I'm not failing in the "challenge within the challenge" that I've set myself and hope that when all is done and dusted that my entries will all merge together in one synergenic whole - or hole, as the case may be. The flaw is I believe that I'm treating each entry as a sequence within a larger plot-line that I still don't have fully worked out yet, which is fun but liable to continuity error. I hope that each sequence has a completeness of sorts but I could be completely wrong, and that may turn out to be the only completeness I can completely depend on.

I actually have the germ of an overall plot that has been coming to me gradually over the last three months but don't be deceived: every episode you see has been tailored to the month's topic. I hope it doesn't look like I'm shoe-horning the topic into something I was going to do, anyway. Last month, the "gutter" recurred in many guises apart from the word-play that gave me the villain's name (the bag lady, the fight in the guttering around the roof-top, the puns in "Gutter press" and "Got 'er" - I omitted only a guttering candle and the "guttural roar was sadly unreadable against the background) and now, most importantly, I have a Major Villain to track down; while this month a truth has been forced onto the vampire the consequences of which will surely impact on her approach to the impending confrontation.

But all I know for certain about next month is that I have three options: Either the vampire will try to track down the Dort, the mugging victim from episode 1 will prepare to confront the vampire or the Guttersniper will have a chance to explain himself. The photograph will determine which of these people is the most suitable protagonist for the next four pages, and even then I still have the vampire's origins, a knowledgable dwarf and (possibly) a police investigation (yawn) that I can draw on as necessary if I get stuck. But in the end, I think I'd still be telling these stories in more-or-less this form even if there wasn't an episodic dimension to the whole thing - though perhaps this month's Burning Truth would have finished with the dinosaurs' extinction and a big "haw-haw!". Naw, I wouldn't have liked that, either. (Incidentally, I might not have quite finished with the dinosaurs yet, either, I'm not sure.)

You know, if anybody was wondering.

Oh, a little PS to Fysh, not really vital, but my entry looks a little squashed. Did I send it that way? Is it worth fixing?

Earthhorse

Hey, if you're finding the comic challenge a good way of getting a longer work done then more power to you! I wouldn't say the topic feels shoe-horned into the piece. Definitely, you give the theme attention. There is just the feeling of it all being part of something larger. I feel I saw everything I needed to see in Lucy's entry, but there was a definite sense of a larger world outside in your piece, and indeed Fysh's, that would lend it better context.

On the white space thing, if these were pages in a printed comic book it wouldn't be an issue. Turning the page or starting a new one would be the white space for you.

Fysh

Hmm, I may have reduced it down too much. I'll tinker with it later when I finish work and see if we can get something more satisfying online for you

Also, I'd just like to take this opportunity to apologise to everyone for the horrible horrible colouring job I did on my entry. The more I look at it the more repulsive it is to me :S I'll be going over the whole thing again and trying to produce a less garish-looking version...

Briony Noh

Very clever, Mr Fysh. Make us all study your art again and again in search of a quality in the colouring that is below acceptable levels with the result that we come to admire it that much more. Well it won't work, I tell you. I already thought it was admirable.

First, I liked the lively, aggressive feel of the pen/brush strokes and the grittiness of the inks, like a splatter-background underlying each image (apart from the explosion which really might have benefitted from it). Maybe it's my monitor, but I really think it works. The only thing that niggles me is the rough-edging. I'd have liked to see it go all the way to the lines instead of jaggedly outlining what was already adequately outlined by the pen. If you were to correct anything (if "correct" is the word I want) I would like to see you correct this (yep, that's the word all right), but encourage you to use your imagination when it comes to the "torching the lab" scene.

But, overall I seriously wouldn't touch a thing. Dark blue against darker blue is courageous but completely doable. The red emergency lighting works brilliantly for me. I love gritty drawing (I'm just incapable of it myself - it just ends up looking amateurish and messy when I try) and this is gritty - except for the explosion which betrays the mix of a little experimentation with just a little too much expedience for my tastes. I find this image just too neat. Added to this, the draftsmanship is among the best I've seen from you here - though to be fair, your Flight entry was pretty good, too and the Shadow colouring was distinctive and memorably atmospheric.

But all of the entries impressed me greatly this month, and I mean that. In previous months I've sometimes felt "nice try", but this month I get the sense of a great deal of thought and directed effort going in to every one. Time for us all to raise our game a little, I suspect.

(anyway, it can't be fair you being the only one allowed to go back and fix things!)

Fysh

Hmmm, I was hoping my comments wouldn't come across as "oh, woe is me (come on everyone, tell me how great my entry is)". But, since you mention it:

the colour looks the way it does because I started in the usual way for me (ie pencils, then inks, on paper) - then used a mixture of coloured pencils, felt tip pens, and pastels to do the colour work. The pastel effect I liked, but the felt tips were predictably child-like and I clearly need to practice a lot more to get the hang of the pencils for subtle colouring effects.

The emergency lighting panel came out just how I wanted it to colourwise, though I'm not sure about some of the digital effects I applied to that page. Part of my reticence over the whole piece is that, consistent though the pencils might be, the colours and digital effects were a bit all over the shop and "oh, look what button I just found", so it's mainly that I want to address.

I have to admit though, I loved that explosion page. I was originally trying for a sort of J H Williams superposition effect (the weird shape at the very centre of the explosion was intended to come across as a small-scale 3-d structure for the building, complete with its own mini-explosion). In the end, since that didn't work, I played with the radial blur and ended up with something that, while not as impressive, did say "EXPLOSION" to me in visual terms.

On a different note : when I do re-work it, I'll post the newer version elsewhere as a v2. I don't like the idea of retconning work ages after the event; the challenge has been good for me so far in terms of refining how I work with limited time, and while I may not be happy with every entry as it was when I finished it, I've managed to learn and improve somewhat from each round by figuring out things that do or don't work, either visually or narratively (I'm now up to two fully-written and storyboarded 8-9 page stories that I've written for the challenge so far and then had to discard because they didn't work or I wasn't able to adequately draw them to make an interesting story; HUZZAH!).

Anyway, I've forgotten what I'd written now. Arse.

However. The site updates (including the re-sized Hellhunter episode as well as Chris FW's entry for this round) should now be up. Let me know if there's any problems with them.

Briony Noh

Sorry, man, just had another look. I still like it as it is. So it was crayons! Edgy! Nevertheless, it'll be interesting to compare it with v2.

Earthhorse

Fysh wrote:

The site updates (including the re-sized Hellhunter episode as well as Chris FW's entry for this round) should now be up.

I was wondering if Chris had simply dissappeared for this round. A good entry, if a little too straightforward to take the title.

The resized Hellhunter pretty much solves any problems I had with it. The text is easy to read and the transitions between "scenes" are easier too.

LucyR

Chris gets my vote that can't be added to the poll vote, loved his entry, short simple, minimal details but captures the short life of a match perfectly (the fact that im a pyro who likes to play w/ matches has nothing to do w/ it ) Simplicity something i love to see, sometimes the details just bog down what you're looking at

Also really really enjoyed the colouring in Fysh's piece, i though it looked really well. Just because you don't like a piece yourself doesn't mean others won't adore it. Can't wait to see teh rest of it.

Robbie's dvd burning tale is so true, loved it, it would have gotten my vote if chris didn't get in just at the last second There are definitely people i know represented there.

Cheers to the nutters who voted for me. It's really encouraging, esp as the idiot at work keeps givin out ot me for not drawing faces!

Well done all, can't wait for the next round!

chrisfw

righto. i'm taking for granted that everyone's work is good, things are starting to get interesting so i'll say a bit about each with what is hopefully constructive stuff, if not just tell me to shut up...

-catherine's party spoiler! this piece seems almost along the lines of newspaper strip humour, i like the surreal elements of it but somehow feel i'm missing some of the joke- i realise the fire person is out of place, but is everyone else in those radioactive suits, or made of ice...? good pacing to the story, and as usual not afraid to use bold colour!

- kyle's revenge story, struck a very similar tone in narrative mood to his Shadow piece, but technically (in the colouring, as well as attempting effects such as the explosion) best work i've seen from him so far! it also almost has the feel of stephen's Hellhunter series in that it feels like there's more to the story but we're jsut being shown a glimpse of it. i have to say the story is very wolverine/v for vendetta, but then ending with him apporaching a house (presumably of the last victim) is pleasantly out of place with that kind of story

- lucy's piece approaches a form of poetic simplicity i feel, but maybe using a bit more spacing or pace with even the same amount of frames/story elements would magnify the impact. i like how elements leak/overlap from frames but maybe imposing a more regular framing system might add a rhythm to the piece

- oisin roche - excellent drawing, great detail, and an interesting bringing together of various versions of truth, light and burning. visually it all sits together well, and as much as i'm a fan of confusing subtitles i think the captions could work very well with just a little bit more attention, or made to interact (or not interact) with the images more to create more of a rapport or tension of word and image.

- some good comic relief from Robbie for a much needed alternative/lighter take on the 'burning truth' theme! a well delivered delivery of the frustrating expereince and a good use of comic-y little icons and motions

- stephen's latest Hellhunter- really good cinematic lead-in to the story! when we got to the Toad-like dude shackled in the basement i thought i'd missed something in the past episodes, and that sense of confusion made me feel this one was harder to follow than the others, but reading it over again that's not true really. good use of the theme to bring into the storyline i think

- yellwork's book burning- oscillates between personal experience (burning detested books from school) and the general experience of passing/letting things go/moving on. the two almost seem at odds with eachother as a theme, one being an adolescent urge but at the same time a rage against authority, the other being a resignation that is almost a ritual, almost buddhist. maybe i'm reading too much. i like the assimilation of images for this rant, though feel the layout could relfect more on the theme! good to see more contributors though and more styles

- my own piece. i was going to abstain from this round, as the theme just wasn't getting me at all. and after the deadline had passed, i came up with a short image, i just wanted a haiku-like simplicity that had ritual and personal elements to it but without story, without background. and almost unfortunately the piece i came up with fit just too well with the 'burning truth', so i figured i might as well submit it for this. there is a danger i think, of the simplicity of the focus going from being personal and intimate to just being too general and almost preachy, particularly with the words i chose for the piece, but that wasn't the intention. i hate to seem to drag the efforts of the rest of the round down, but then my strength isn't as a draftsman but more concepts and writing....

RobbieBonham

Thanks for the kind words, guys...