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stingy friend getting on my tits

  • 10-08-2006 1:06am
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,372 ✭✭✭


    [rant]ok here's the story. A friend of mine, I have known him for about 3 years, is the tightest person you could have the displeasure of knowing. he borrows money and doesn't repay it, he leeches beer from us, with and without asking! he never seems to have money of his own, despite the fact he has a job, getting around 30 hrs a week.

    before it was understandable because he didn't have a job, but now that he has one he still hasn't changed from being a tight f*cker.

    the latest thing he did really really got on my tits: we were walking down on the beach going to one of the pubs at the harbour with some bottles of beer in our hands. we were quite drunk, but not falling about the place. Anyway I tripped over a step and my beer went into the sand, I dusted myself off and one of the lads asked Mr. x to hand me one of the two beers he was holding as they were only holding one each. So he holds the bottles up to the light, sees that one is almost empty and the other half full, takes a mouthfull out of the near empty one and offers it to me, at this stage with a dribble in it. I slapped it out of his hand and did a bit of name calling, the other guys on my side.

    now that might seem like a childish joke or something, but it really got to me, it was the straw that broke the camels back[rant]

    sorry about that, I just really needed to get it off my chest


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 124 ✭✭girldef


    In future if he asks for money say you only have enough for you. Also when you see him taking the beer, take it back from him and say thanks for getting me a beer :)
    He will only stop taking the p*** when you tell him to stop!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,372 ✭✭✭The Bollox


    we have told him and told him and told him, nothing is sinking in


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,925 ✭✭✭aidan24326


    Perhaps it's time this guy was no longer your 'friend'? At the very least don't lend him money if he never pays it back. I don't usually have a problem with lending someone money but if they make no effort to pay it back I will think twice before lending to them again. Next time tell the scrounging twerp to fcuk off.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,558 ✭✭✭CyberGhost


    I'd have lost my nerv earlier probably, I HATE people who hold on to their money and wait for you to spend yours on them.

    I had this very good friend, but he just never sent money, I mean it had to be something critical so he'd spare some money, he'd die and would not go to pool with me, until I'd say "come on dude, it's my treat" then he'd come...... or for example about 3 month ago........... he does not call me a whole year, and when it's a week before his birthday, he calls up and asks how am I, and then slips in that he's looking for some t-shirt and if I could find it on the web for him, and he'd pay me for it, right! what he was expecting me to do is to make him a gift....so I'm still looking for that shirt to this day...., so after some time, I thought to myself "F him" and drifted away from him.

    Anyways, sorry for stealing your thread for my own rent Marts... but my point is that you're right, and should not feel sorry, screw him!

    EDIT: and if he does not understand it, tell him straight! I mean do you really want him as a friend? to me he just sounds useless... spending money is one thing, but taking a last sip from a beer bottle and handing to your friend is just ....well, highest form of impudance......


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 36,634 ✭✭✭✭Ruu_Old


    aidan24326 wrote:
    Perhaps it's time this guy was no longer your 'friend'? At the very least don't lend him money if he never pays it back. I don't usually have a problem with lending someone money but if they make no effort to pay it back I will think twice before lending to them again. Next time tell the scrounging twerp to fcuk off.

    I'd go with this, get your mates to back you up. Sit him down in the pub and make him listen if you have to.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,372 ✭✭✭The Bollox


    when I say lending, I mean small things like fivers, or taxy fares (local), not big money, but they all add up.

    Here's another good one. we were in one of the lads gaffs drinking before a 21st. I didn't bring beer as I assumed we were going straight to the party. Anyway on the way out he came up to me and asked me if I wanted one of his bottles of Martens Pills (you can get 6 for 7 euro) I said yeah, thanks, and he said cool, you can just buy me a drink in the pub. I stared him out of it and said "a drink costs about 4 euro, one of them cost about 1 euro, go f*ck yourself" he said "right! take one then, you don't need to get me a pint" and I just walked away from him


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,372 ✭✭✭The Bollox


    CyberGhost wrote:
    I'd have lost my nerv earlier probably, I HATE people who hold on to their money and wait for you to spend yours on them.

    I had this very good friend, but he just never sent money, I mean it had to be something critical so he'd spare some money, he'd die and would not go to pool with me, until I'd say "come on dude, it's my treat" then he'd come...... or for example about 3 month ago........... he does not call me a whole year, and when it's a week before his birthday, he calls up and asks how am I, and then slips in that he's looking for some t-shirt and if I could find it on the web for him, and he'd pay me for it, right! what he was expecting me to do is to make him a gift....so I'm still looking for that shirt to this day...., so after some time, I thought to myself "F him" and drifted away from him.

    Anyways, sorry for stealing your thread for my own rent Marts... but my point is that you're right, and should not feel sorry, screw him!
    I am happy for people to voice their personal experiences, it's nice to know I am not alone


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 575 ✭✭✭Strokesfan


    I think you should a conversation with your friends about it when he's not around and slag him off for being tight any time he borrows money etc, if everybody starts slagging him for not goin his round, for borrowing, for never being generous - shame him in acting differently - it's mean but if he's that tight and he's earning a wage - why should ye be expected to support his lifestyle while he saves it all for a car or something... :(


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,524 ✭✭✭✭Gordon


    Marts wrote:
    when I say lending, I mean small things like fivers, or taxy fares (local), not big money, but they all add up.
    Then stop lending him small things Marts. It's quite easy. He's being a complete jerk about similar stuff with you so you don't have to feel compelled to lend him such stuff.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,089 ✭✭✭fuzzywiggle


    Just don't give him anything. Jusy don't do it. When he asks for things or tries to take things say in a joking way ''have you not got your own'' or ''where's your own money?'' so it doesnt get too serious but he still knows what you're thinking. You could always try to scab off him. See how that goes


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,187 ✭✭✭Mrs_Doyle


    I know how you feel, I had one pal, a girl I had known since we where 12, considered a good pal.
    When we finished school we booked a holiday to Ayia Napa, a big gang of us were going, including my BF and 3 of his mates.
    Myself, this girl, *MARY* and the 3 lads were all sharing an apartment.
    *MARY* only brought £500 for 2 weeks, despite the fact that she had a few bob in the bank.
    The first day we arrived we hit the super market and bought a few essentials (booze) and Mary immediately got out a black marker and wrote her name across every thing that she had bought.
    That night we went for dinner, Mary says she isn't hungry, just orders soup, as soon as her soup was gone she just started leaning over and taking chips from my dinner plate.
    Now it was only day one and so this really wasn't bothering anyone just yet.
    EVERY SINGLE NIGHT SHE WOULD DO THE SAME THING!
    She would only ever order soup and then eat from other peoples plates and drink from their cups. Some of my mates didn't know he that well and started complaining to me about her.
    Every morning she would go to the fridge and check that no one had been drinking from her bottles, but at night she had no problem drinking from other peoples bottles.
    On the last night of the holiday she said she had run out of cash, I leant her £60 (which might sound like feck all but I was only 18 myself and hardly rolling in money)
    We went off that night and as usual Mary managed to get a load of free rounds etc, and she spent very little of the money I gave her.
    The following day,I hadn't a single penny to my name, I was completely stone broke, couldn't even afford to buy a sandwhich in the airport.
    I complained loudly about being broke and she said nothing so a little while later I asked her if she had any cash left from the money I had leant her the night before.
    She shows me 2 plastic bags full of duty free choloclates and said she had just spent the last of the cash in duty free!
    Seriously!!!!!!! And she knew I was totally stone broke!
    Well she is no longer my friend, I never got my money back and we never spoke after we returned home.
    Sorry for hi-jacking your thread OP, just wanted you to know we all have stingy friends, sometimes you just have to cut them loose - for your own sanity!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    I have a stingy friend too - but only when it comes to money.
    In other ways - like, getting a lift in the car from him etc - he's ok.
    (Fuel costs money too).

    But these days, I will remind him in the pub that it is his 'round'.
    He usually responds positively.

    Otherwise .... if that is not the case, then I think one
    can forget about such a friend.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,350 ✭✭✭Lust4Life


    Your friend needs to get priorities in line.
    As it stands, he is just sucking the energy out of you!
    I know people like this as well. They never get it. Even if you blatantly make the point clear to them.
    It is best to just keep repeating the point and they will either A) Stop asking all the time or B) Start avoiding you because you know how to say no.

    Spend your energy on more positive friends. You'll feel better that way!

    L4L


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,528 ✭✭✭TomCo


    I'm really anal about paying back loans, even if its only a few quid.

    I hate when people say, "Nah it's ok, forget about it." because I have to insist.


  • Moderators, Computer Games Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 18,809 Mod ✭✭✭✭Kimbot


    Well I was in a situation like that not too long ago myself!!
    One of my mates would be great, have a job, go out drinking etc!!
    He lost his job, a few of us paid for thinks like going out etc for a bit till he got back on his feet and after a few months it became a pain in the rear! He could afford smokes everyday no problem to him and get petrol for his car yet when it came to anything else he scabbed!! It got on my nerves so much that I went nuts at him for it!! Ain't no friend of mine no more!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 224 ✭✭Jotter


    When I was about 15 I used to 'smoke'. When I say smoke, I smoked around smokers and bec I didnt really smoke I rarely had a box on me so used to take cigs off other people. One night this bloke said to me, noone likes a sponge you know, in front of everyone. Well my face burned but I stopped scabbing smokes pretty damn quick! I hadnt thought about never having a box bec I didnt actually smoke for real, whereas people who were spending there money on smokes bec they needed them were pissed off and thats fair enough. My point is if you want to keep him as a mate then dont beat around the bush, tell him you think hes scabby and why and that its becoming a serious issue. If he changes he values your friendship, if he doesnt then hes a scabby f*ck*r and your better off without!


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