frustration over fantasies

LegacyUser

hey,
I'm in a long term relationship and my gfriend and we share everything with eachother. However, I have recently being getting really frustrated because I have loads of sexual fantasies, but can never actually act on them. Obvious examples would be multiple partners and I would never expect the gfriend to agree to that. Others could be considered highly kinky, so again, couldn't act on most of them. My gfriend knows all about them and is very open about things, wanting to please me, but I never feel fulfilled.

Do other people feel this in relationships at all? I don't have a clue how to solve this.

Kell

Has she ever said no to your wishes?

Sorta sounds like you assume you cant act on your wishes as opposed to knowing you cant.

Many partners is a typical male one alright, but I would not suggest you do it in the confines of a relationship unless your totally open with the idea that it might work both ways i.e. if she wants two blokes at some stage.

If she hasnt said no, whats stopping you going for it.

K-

LegacyUser

Kell wrote:

Has she ever said no to your wishes?

Sorta sounds like you assume you cant act on your wishes as opposed to knowing you cant.

Many partners is a typical male one alright, but I would not suggest you do it in the confines of a relationship unless your totally open with the idea that it might work both ways i.e. if she wants two blokes at some stage.

If she hasnt said no, whats stopping you going for it.

K-

Part of the problem is seperating the romantic/personal side of the sexual relationship from the purely carnal/fantasy driven side. They can sometimes clash and it can be hard to enact fantasies with my partner.

I suppose in some ways, real life doesn't live up to the fantasy

Dors1976

cold shower? wrote:

My gfriend knows all about them and is very open about things, wanting to please me, but I never feel fulfilled.

Do other people feel this in relationships at all? I don't have a clue how to solve this.

Talk to her, be honest and open with her too and you never know what she'll say. She might want to try different things too and maybe too nervous but if you talk through it together, you never know. We used to try different places, poitions and lots of stuff, watched porn, vibrators, you name it:D . I had a 3some with my ex years ago but i didn't work out well but then last year I had a 3some with a mate and his mate. AMAZING, would certainly recommend it! It's a fantastic experience.

Kell

cold shower? wrote:

I suppose in some ways, real life doesn't live up to the fantasy

As is often the case. So- are you posting about frustrations with enacting fantasies with your girlfriend or frustrations with your girlfriend not living up to what you thought?

K-

Marksie

cold shower? wrote:

hey,
Obvious examples would be multiple partners and I would never expect the gfriend to agree to that. Others could be considered highly kinky, so again, couldn't act on most of them. My gfriend knows all about them and is very open about things, wanting to please me, but I never feel fulfilled.

If she knows all about them has she said she doesnt act on them> she wants to please you? what does she want to please her?. are there common ground between the two of you where you could explore.
define highly kinky? for some that would be sex with the light on, for others it would be three chipmanzees, an oompha loopmha and a bucket of custard.

If you have talked them through haev you actually asked her which she might like to try you might be surprised.. the worst she can do is say not that one, but may really like the thoughts about another. Then ask about her fantasies, in essence take it in turns.

Sometimes fantasies are better off just as fantasies..you can role play. i know a couple who attended a party sometime back enacted a fantasy and then proceeded to have a screaming argument. In their case the fantasy was much better than the reality