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poem

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  • 03-08-2006 10:02pm
    #1
    LUNA...
    Closed Accounts Posts: 67 ✭✭


    I feel abit odd putting this up here. Have read some stuff here and it's really great. Anyway here goes,


    Dark and black, dead and blue
    Shaking hands what can I do?
    Teasing, screaming pain and joy
    A body as your pleasing toy

    Straight and sharp, stoned and weak
    Your understanding’s all I seek
    Begging pleading wanting more
    Is this all that my life was for?


Comments

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    #2
    MagnumForce
    Closed Accounts Posts: 630 ✭✭✭MagnumForce


    nice, i like it. the rhythm, rhyme and wording are really well selected.


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    #3
    LUNA..
    Registered Users Posts: 26 ✭LUNA..


    Hey, thanks for the comment.
    My account went awol, have had to set up a new one.
    Luna..


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    #4
    Odaise Gaelach
    Registered Users Posts: 1,235 ✭✭✭Odaise Gaelach


    It's a good poem. Unfortunately, I don't really understand what it's about. Unrequited love is the best guess that I can make.

    But good work anyway. :)


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    #5
    LUNA..
    Registered Users Posts: 26 ✭LUNA..


    Odaise Gaelach wrote:
    It's a good poem. Unfortunately, I don't really understand what it's about. Unrequited love is the best guess that I can make.

    But good work anyway. :)

    Thanks for your reply, it's good to see what other people make of a poem without being told what it's about.
    It's actually about addiction and how your mind can have a love affair with the substance. So your correct, it is about unrequited love but not with a person.

    Thanks.


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    #6
    Odaise Gaelach
    Registered Users Posts: 1,235 ✭✭✭Odaise Gaelach


    LUNA.. wrote:
    It's actually about addiction and how your mind can have a love affair with the substance. So your correct, it is about unrequited love but not with a person.

    Ah. Stoned and weak. Now I see. :)


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    #7
    Matt Holck
    Registered Users Posts: 9,706 ✭✭✭Matt Holck


    No

    getting stoned does not make me week


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    #8
    LUNA..
    Registered Users Posts: 26 ✭LUNA..


    Matt Holck wrote:
    No

    getting stoned does not make me week

    Is that, "getting stoned does not make me week" as in, it's not the highlight of you week.:mad:

    Or did you mean that personally getting stoned does not make you weak??:rolleyes:


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    #9
    Sarky
    Closed Accounts Posts: 31,967 ✭✭✭✭Sarky


    Both of you, make sense, please.


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    #10
    takola
    Registered Users Posts: 4,138 ✭✭✭takola


    I really like this poem. It struck a cord with me. I rarely find poetry I can relate to. Though I must admit I wouldn't have thought it was about an addiction! Though that is probably my relating my own stuff to it! :rolleyes:

    Great work Luna! :)


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    #11
    LUNA...
    Closed Accounts Posts: 67 ✭✭LUNA...


    takola wrote:
    I really like this poem. It struck a cord with me. I rarely find poetry I can relate to. Though I must admit I wouldn't have thought it was about an addiction! Though that is probably my relating my own stuff to it! :rolleyes:

    Great work Luna! :)

    I'm glad you like it. TBH I felt a bit of a twat putting a poem up here. I suppose everyone feels strange the first time they post up something that's personal.

    Thanks everyone that's taken the time to comment on it. ;)


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