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Afraid To Date

  • 01-08-2006 8:00pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hey guys,
    Short intro; im a 17 year old guy.quite attractive, like you'd turn your head on the street, im nice though and in no way superficial. in fact i think thats the problem.
    my problem is Im afraid to start dating because, this may sound very silly but, i dont believe relationships will work out and I dont want someone to fall in love with me because I dont want to hurt them.

    I only want to be friends with girls but right now Im really confused, especially since me and my best friend (is a girl) are getting closer and closer and there is a sexual attraction between us, I can tell because we almost went the whole way,it was the lack of protection that stopped us.

    The thing is though Im annoyed at myself for allowing her fall for me because I know now that if we take it further than friends,when it ends she'll be really hurt because of me and I dont want that to happen. Thats the way I see it with all girls so now its gotten bad like I only make eyecontact with girls on the street but look away quickly in case they get an idea that we should date.

    Because of myself and my friend bordering on more than friends ive been thinking about it a lot recently. And since Ive never dated I don't know how to go and get a date. ANY advice would help me so thanks in advance xxx


Comments

  • #2
    melekalikimaka
    Moderators, Education Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 10,686 Mod ✭✭✭✭melekalikimaka


    explain it to her, shes a friend, she'll understand


  • #3
    Ruu_Old
    Closed Accounts Posts: 36,634 ✭✭✭✭Ruu_Old


    Theres a good chance you are going to get hurt in the future at some stage, OP. Its just one of those things that is going to happen but it will make you stronger. There are wonderful, kind and gentle people out there with plenty of love and happiness to share with you. Have a chat with your friend, let her know your thoughts and good luck. :)


  • #4
    aidan24326
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,925 ✭✭✭aidan24326


    You seem very confused. Fear of hurting people is not a valid reason to avoid dating unless you're a potentially dangerous psycopath, which I trust you're not. Sure you might hurt someone and even get hurt yourself. That's how it goes sometimes. But you'll never know if you don't give it a try. As for 'how to go and get a date' there's no quick fix answer to that one. Mixing socially amongst friends etc. if there's someone you like go for it, ask her out. You say you're a pretty good looking guy so you shouldn't have a problem. If you fancy your friend (she appears to like you also) then tell her how you feel and see how it goes. You claim you're a nice guy so why are you so concerned that you'll hurt somebody? You're 17 and good-looking, go enjoy. Many a lonely, balding middle-aged man would kill to be in your shoes!! Treat any girl you're with very nicely and you'll have nothing to worry about.


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