shy at the workplace

puppyhead

im dreading having to start work. i have been very shy in jobs before and as a result my work suffered, and i looked incompetent. i cant help it, i just become very quiet and i speak really low and nervsouly. i cant seem to interact with people well yet i know im a loud person at heart...

whiskeyman

You know you are a loud person at heart?
Do you mean you can interact ok with people outside a workplace scenerio?

You have to realise *you* have to make the effort. I used to be a very shy person, but got involved in sports clubs in colleges and helped out and played. It was tough, but so worth it.
Make an effort to say hello, make conversation and join the sports & social club in the job. Once people see your outgoing spirit you claim to have, they'll most likely warm to you.
The key is self esteem and confidence, that you seem to be lacking. It's amazing what a little effort on your part can do to overcome so much. You're going to have to force yourself to get involved with people and, not only listen, but talk back and react with confidence.
Best of luck.

Strokesfan

Hey, same thing here, I can get very intimidated and start stumbling over my sentences in some situations and then on a night out I might be the most sociable person in the bar, talking to strangers so I think I know what you mean in that you suffer shyness in particular situations.
I read a brilliant article a while back and I kept it and quoted it a couple of times but one part was:

"people are not that frightening. Nor are they that powerful. We give them power by believing they have it. We make them frightening through our own perceptions - not because they actually are"

I think you should find some way of relaxing yourself in these situations like repeating the above to yourself (or something less cheesey if you find it so), smile, get your point across, be confident in your own abilities.
Nobody looks forward to starting a new job in the sense of being around all these people for the first time and not knowing what you're doing but stand your ground - you've just as much to contribute

Marksie

Just give yourself time to settle in.
tthe first few days will be a blur, it is always the same about startinng a new job. In time you will get to know the lie opf the land and then settle in.

I think that you will find most people wont bite your head off.

I remember once being terified of giving lecturess and presentations. The tipping point for me was going to St. louis to present results of a research paper.

I had practiced for weeks, but h#when i got there there were a few hundred people. My voice was steady, but the light pen wandered all over the place lol.
After it i headed to the bar and wasnt seen for the rest of the day .

Point is it wasnt as bad as i thought and after it i was cool about everything..same with yu and your new job

theTinker

new jobs are the WORST, that and places where u know u are going to start an argument with a solictor or checkout person. shivers in my spine just thinking.

I am not THAT shy but i get very nervous sumtimes in work situations, about making a clown out of my self. As u have mentioned, u have had more jobs and each of them u regretted and seeing how destructive being too shy can be to u. I would suggest u use this as self motivation "shy peircing" ammuntion. This new job will be the same if u dont break the cycle. cycles are **** hard to break but once u do it once, its like "that was so easy"..
U could also look at this job as a fresh start and allow urself to be the center of attention and dont be afraid to call sum1 from 10 meters away and have a conversation from afar . its a great way to kick start ur day

Ruu_Old

Once you settle in and give the hang of things, I reckon you won't have a problem at all. Best of luck with the new job.

Miss Fluff

Luckily I'm a confident person. However I do find that if I'm absolutely petrified in a situation the key is to actually *ACT* confident, by pretending to do so you alleviate your own fears and come accross as confident to those who don't know you as well as others might. It works.;)

GretchenWieners

don't worry, just relax, be yourself and ENJOY work!! I used be like a mute I was so shy cos of school (I HATED IT) but as soon as I started work the real me came out and you'll look back thinking "i was like that?!" seriously!! =0)

Anti

i see this all the time with new people in work, and its a real shame as their not being their selfs. And people often take shyness as them being ignorant or stupid.Just go into work head held high, look people in the eyes when you talk to them and be assertive. not overly assertive though dont want to give the wrong impression