Couples!!

JustLikeheaven

Has anybody ever lived on their own with a couple before?
I moved out of my old place a week ago and into my friends flat. It just wrecks my head that theyre constantly at it every nite. Last nite just went too far. It was only 11 o clock!! I dont think they have the slightest clue that i can hear all that and cant sleep with it. I cant even give my mind rest when they do. I keep trying to find something else to think about, but i cant. Its actually wrecking my head!! Help!!

fuzzywiggle

Just say it to one of them. Say it in a joking way as not to cause embarrassment or an arguement.. just something like ''god, you's were so hard at it last night I couldn't get asleep!!'' They should take the hint with that and try to quieten down!

MW

Start shouting along with them, they'd be so freaked out they'd shut up, and then they'd be too embarrassed to ever speak of it again, or shout go on (insert name here) ya good thing!! Nearly there!!

koneko

Just have a quiet word with your friend, ask him if they could maybe keep it down a bit, it's just that you're trying to get to sleep and they're a wee bit loud. He'll probably be embarrassed and say "sure no problem, sorry about that".

Shouting along with them is more than likely going to make them think you're a basketcase perv, and that won't help the atmosphere in the house :rolleyes:

kittenkiller

Buy them some hardcore bondage gear including ballgags, leave it outside their door with a post it saying Hint on it!

killswitch

buy them a gag ball that will shut at least one of them up lol

um7y1h83ge06nx

Or fight fire with fire and bring back a girl/guy/animal back to your room some night, and as me and my friends say "restructure the house" with some very energetic and noisy sex.

Then hopefully they'll realise that you have being hearing stuff like that every night

fabcat

I don't mean to be horrible, as I'm sure its very annoying, but if your friend offered you a room in her/his home, surely she's entitled to make as much noise as he/she wants?

Fanny Cradock

you've only been living there a week and you want them to alter their sex life for you!!! buy ear plugs

Surrender

Thats bo**ix, tell your mate. I'm sure he would feel as awkward about it as you do. No-one should put up with that. You could of course tape it and post it on the net. I'd say that'll put an end to it:D

Nickibaby*

MW wrote:

Start shouting along with them, they'd be so freaked out they'd shut up, and then they'd be too embarrassed to ever speak of it again, or shout go on (insert name here) ya good thing!! Nearly there!!

Ha that post had me in stitches i literally spat my coffee out!

Good suggestion too

daRobot

Get over it, people have sex. What exactly did you expect when you agreed to move in with a couple?

Get some good ear plugs and they wont bother you.

seamus

You could quietly mention it to him, but if they've been on their own for a while they probably won't quieten down. There are also plenty of people who want others to know they're shagging (it's a male bravado/female exhibitionism thing).

Ear plugs are really the only way.

neuro-praxis

I lived with my best mates (a couple) for years and we had no issues. I went out regularly so they had plenty of time alone, and they in turn were always quiet when I was home. I never heard a peep out of them in bed. And we never needed to discuss it. I think your friends are deeply inconsiderate. If I was in your boat, I'd move out. I couldn't tolerate (a) that noise or (b) feeling that I was inconveniencing them by being there, or asking for quiet.

manonthemoon

Move out. Move Out asap. Living with couples is a disaster. Couples shouldnt live with other people. Been there and on both sides. Go now quick!!!!!!!

shinners007

if its that bad move out.
they have evry right to do what they like.. and 11 o clock aint late for some bedroom antics either....... unless of course they last till elen the following morning:D

Oryx

Some people pay good money to hear stuff like that.;) Seriously, its their house, theyre free to do what they like. Tell one of them in a reasonable way that you can hear everything they do, so they have an opportunity to quieten down if they hadnt realised. After that, if it bothers you buy headphones and drown it out. At 11pm theyre hardly keeping you up anyway.

declanoneill

I would consider this to be the same thing as playing music, loudly, late at night. I'd have a quite word and just say it's keeping you awake. Assuming they're nice enough they'll keep it down, if they don't, wait 20 minutes after they've stopped (and are most likely sleeping), then play some Lordi. Fair is fair.

<edit>

I've just re-read your post and it looks like they're letting you stay there as a favour. Still ask them would they mind keeping it down, but don't do the Lordi thing, otherwise you'll be told to sling your hook

</edit>

ergonomics

You mean to say that if you were in a relationship and a friend came to live with you that you'd stop having sex as frequently as normal just for them?

Chinafoot

I guess it all depends on what the living arrangement actually is. Are you staying there while you look for somewhere else or have you moved in properly, as in paying rent?

If it's the former then I'd say suck it up until you find your own place.

If it's the latter then I'd have a word. If you're going to be there longterm then you should really discuss it with your friend. As has been suggested, don't make a big deal out of it, just mention it in a casual way. Maybe make a joke out of it.

I agree that you can't expect them to change their habits completely because you have moved in. However there has to be some give and take. If you are paying rent then it's your home too. Just because they've been there longer doesn't make it "theirs" nor does it entitle them to do whatever they please regardless of how you feel.

I'd say though that your mates don't know how you feel and you should really talk to them about it if you continue to stay there.

Personally I would never live with a couple. I'll be moving in with my boyfriend soon and we will getting our own place.

GoldieBear

JustLikeheaven wrote:

Has anybody ever lived on their own with a couple before?
I moved out of my old place a week ago and into my friends flat. It just wrecks my head that theyre constantly at it every nite. Last nite just went too far. It was only 11 o clock!! I dont think they have the slightest clue that i can hear all that and cant sleep with it. I cant even give my mind rest when they do. I keep trying to find something else to think about, but i cant. Its actually wrecking my head!! Help!!

I lived with my boyfriend's cousin and his wife for a year (while he was renovating the house) and it wnet grand. It just got embarassing and awkward if they ever had an argument (cold silences etc.) As for the sex, my room was next to theirs and i just ended up going to sleep with the radio on listening to music and it worked OK for me after i got used to it.

vibe666

personally, I'd wait right outside their bedroom door until about 30 seconds before you expect it to go quiet (you should know when that'll be after a week of it ) and burst in screaming with a kitchen knife.

when you see them, do your best to look as shocked as possible and explain that from the noises you'd heard you were convinced that they were being attacked by a serial killer and felt compelled to save them. then just back out, say sorry and close the door.

i bet you never hear another peek out of them after that.

Asok

I found a good playlist and strong speakers usually got the point across
e.g.
Bloodhound Gang - Bad Touch.
Theme music to raw hide.
Random steeple chase music.
Aqua - Barbie Girl

AOR

/edit apologies

Nevyn

Unhelpful and off-topic posting will get you banned from this forum.
Do take time to read the charter which contains the rules and abide by them.
Have a nice day.
Thaedydal

elvis2002

Get some ear plugs. They'll sort you out. Might be uncomfortable but you'll get used to them in a couple of days. 11 isn't that late though tbh. It could work out if you mention it in the wrong way that they'll be at it at 3 instead. I'd agree with someone up above, ie the next time you see her at the breakfeast table you could mention 'hard at it last night werent ya's and walk off laughing'

Faith

Ugh, I feel for you! Hearing others having sex is something that I abhor. My preferred treatment would be to bang on the wall and shout "Shut the fúck up!" but I doubt that's the best idea.

I guess try talking to your friend and explain that it's affecting your sleep.

Black Swan

Make a joke about joining them for a threesome?:D

Grem

Give them some time alone maybe one or two evenings a week if you can.

Or else listen to music going asleep. Its inconvenient for you to HAVE to but it is their place and they probably are so used to being alone in the house that they dont realise that they are making so much noise.

Or as mentioned before, say it to your friend, tell him its wrecking your head and if they dont get a bit quieter then play loud music to drown them out.

Shellie13

Cohen Microscopic Pecan wrote:

Or fight fire with fire and bring back a girl/guy/animal back to your room some night, and as me and my friends say "restructure the house" with some very energetic and noisy sex.

Then hopefully they'll realise that you have being hearing stuff like that every night

Or try a bita "solo" scream your OWN name as loud as poss...
Going back to the basket case look here lol...but a little mutual embarrasment can go a long way teehee...

Then again you could buy earplugs...or a nice ol cd....
You are new to the house maybe drop a few suble hints but don't push it...They WERE there 1st!

jrey1981

as one other poster said, if you are only there temporarily, I guess you have to put up with it for a bit.

Of course, you could always threaten them with an ASBO :eek:

But if you are there for a while, you might want to mention it in a jokey way.

I lived with a couple for a year and I think once we had a bit of a joke about it and it was never again an issue.

It could be worse, when I was in uni halls of residence, when the girl in the room opposite me was, ahem, enjoying herself, the whole of our floor knew about it! She was a bit of a slapper as well, which didnt help.

Slutmonkey57b

Ah uni, when girls do it they're slappers, when guys do it they're legends, eh?

Bottom line, it's their place, you're an adult, get over it.

Chinafoot

Slutmonkey57b wrote:

Bottom line, it's their place, you're an adult, get over it.

The OP hasn't responded yet so I could be wrong, but if he/she is paying rent then it's his/her place too.

Like I said before, just because they were there first doesn't mean that the OP should feel like a guest if he/she has in fact moved in fully.

If you found a room in an apartment with someone you didn't know, moved in and paid rent every month you'd consider it your home wouldn't you? Why should it be any different just because they're his/her friends?

bugler

Peachypants is right. It's not "their" place if the poster is paying rent.

If the original post had been about someone doing DIY every night you wouldn't have people saying "get over it".

If you're paying rent you deserve peace and quiet, if that's what you want.

A good solid bed is essential. But if it's moaning, it takes self-control.

My girlfriend stays over a lot, and I'm very conscious that we are not too noisy and don't inconvenience my housemate. Sex noise is noise, and noise is ignorance.