Getting the girl...

SummerOfSam

Hey all,

just looking for a bit of advice. I have been seeing this wonderful girl for about 6 weeks. We had been getting on well, although she had been growing distant over the last 2 weeks and then this week she rings and tells me that she was seeing someone 6 months ago. She ended that relationship but she says she feels that she can't handle a relationship right now, that it feels too soon. She says that she does like me and it's nothing to do with me. Well I have heard that line before, but I do believe this one.

I have been down this road more times than I can remember in the past, but this time I don't want to lose the girl, I feel like she is worth the effort. The next day (2 days ago) I sent her an email about how i felt and that would she reconsider, to think about it. She replied simply saying she was thinking about it... What do you think I should do, should I wait a few more days to contact her and tell her I miss her? should I send flowers to her work place? I do really like this girl, I want to give it a chance!

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

secret_squirrel

SummerOfSam wrote:

wait a few more days to contact her

That one.

Sending flowers in this situation would make you look like a psycho.

kittenkiller

I agree with SS.
Just play it easy. Say nothing too serious or heavy at this stage. You've stated your case & she's considering it.
Try to relax about it. What will happen will happen.

Best of luck.

SummerOfSam

Thanks for the replies, I think you're right, ....wait... yeah I thought the flowers might be a bit much myself, but all things are considered when it comes to affairs of the heart :-)

Owen

You can't have her, so you want her more. Reverse the roles. If she knows she can have you immediately, she'll lose interest. It's human nature. Unfortunately, human nature sucks. Hang in there buddy :-)

LegacyUser

ned78 wrote:

You can't have her, so you want her more. Reverse the roles. If she knows she can have you immediately, she'll lose interest. It's human nature. Unfortunately, human nature sucks. Hang in there buddy :-)

Why do these games still have to be played? I Mean i play them myself sometimes, but why the **** like? It's so pointless...

wb

Yeah, you just gotta hang in there for a while and wait around. I know it is tough, but try your best not to be ringing or e-mailing too much as it may come across as strong or desperate. Just wait a while. Hope it works out

keithclancy

Go an tryout a few other short term relationships

noeleenred

I would wait until she comes back to you, she sais that she's not ready for a relationship and needs to think about it. So maybe you shouldn't rush her and let her come back to you in her own time.

Vegeta

These situations are like a bar of soap, the harder you try and hold on to it, the further it will fly out of your control

DO NOT pressure her. I know you are prob crazy about her but you have to consider she may never get back to you and you have to live your life knowing this.

Has she asked you to remain her friend??

Wing Walker

keithclancy wrote:

Go an tryout a few other short term relationships

Good advice.

Don't, for the love of Allah Buddah God, put your life on hold for someone who doesn't know what they want. Life is for living!:)

Surrender

ned78 wrote:

You can't have her, so you want her more. Reverse the roles. If she knows she can have you immediately, she'll lose interest. It's human nature. Unfortunately, human nature sucks. Hang in there buddy :-)

Yeah I think you shouldn't appear to be sitting by the phone on this, I know its not the greatest advice but it usually works, if she thinks you're losing intrest it might get her to make a move

claire h

Don't push her. If she says it feels too soon then you have to respect that. There is a fine line between being romantic and being stalkery.