Needs advice ASAP - Rape

LegacyUser

This is insane. I'm trying to type this without going in a rage.

Long time poster here.

I can't believe what just happened.

I met a Canadian girl outside Hogans tonight. She had just met a French man. She's French Canadian. Beautiful model type.

She wanted to meet me tomorrow (today - Saturday) as we hit it off. By coincidence an hour later I met them outside my apartment block.

I invited them into my apartment. We smoked some grass and drank some wine. The girl told us a long story about how she was raped. I didn't NOT believe her, but it sounded like "an American girl looking for attention."

Anyway, I was extremely nice to her and tried to make her feel comfortable and laugh (it worked.)

The French guy left and it was just me and the Canadian. We started hugging on the chair and she asked me to lick her hip area. Anyway, one thing led to another and we ended up having sex. She started freaking out after about 4 or 5 minutes (crying) so I stopped. We hugged for about 30 minutes and then decided to go for a romantic breakfast (I'm aware no where is open yet) and a romantic walk in Iveagh Gardens (romantic park in Dublin.) She was delighted and we kissed and talked and hugged.

We left the apartment and once we got to Grafton Street she asked who I was. I was like, "Um... you know who I am, I'm walking you home so you can check in with you friends and then we're going for breakfast."

She started freaking out that the last 3 hours are a blank and that I raped her. I was like "WHAT THE ****" although I'm kind of used to psychos so I assumed if I walked her home things would be fine by then.

She ran away from me and I caught up with her and I said I wanted to call the police and talk to them about the situation. She said she'll tell them I raped her and ran away from me. I ran after her and caught up with her on Nassau Street. She was talking to some Mexican types crying and screaming. When she saw me she ran away. I asked them what should I do she's pretending I raped her and they were like she's clearly crazy ignore her she's talking bull**** but I can't ignore her.

Will she tell the next guy she's been raped twice this year? Once by the guy she told me about and another time by me?

Should I call the police about this? I only know her name and nationality, but she knows where I live and the company I own so I am freaked out about her making insane statements about me.

I do not want to leave myself open for a psycho bitch to have her mental fun with me.

What should I do? I'm totally freaking out. I promise everything that happened between us was HER IDEA and I stopped when she started crying.

I don't know what to do. I didn't rape her.

LegacyUser

Wow what a mentaler...go to the cops straight away and make a statement because if she does (and she probably will) you will look guilty for not saying anything.

My head is still spinning after reading that...being a girl Im not so sure but I would imagine its every guy's worst nightmare..

Nevyn

It could well be that the illegal drugs that were consumed messed with her memeory, and she can't recall correctly what happened.

Giruilla

check your pockets, wallet etc? valuables in your gaf!!

Carpenter

FreakingOut wrote:

This is insane. I'm trying to type this without going in a rage.

Long time poster here.

I can't believe what just happened.

I met a Canadian girl outside Hogans tonight. She had just met a French man. She's French Canadian. Beautiful model type.

She wanted to meet me tomorrow (today - Saturday) as we hit it off. By coincidence an hour later I met them outside my apartment block.

I invited them into my apartment. We smoked some grass and drank some wine. The girl told us a long story about how she was raped. I didn't NOT believe her, but it sounded like "an American girl looking for attention."

Anyway, I was extremely nice to her and tried to make her feel comfortable and laugh (it worked.)

The French guy left and it was just me and the Canadian. We started hugging on the chair and she asked me to lick her hip area. Anyway, one thing led to another and we ended up having sex. She started freaking out after about 4 or 5 minutes (crying) so I stopped. We hugged for about 30 minutes and then decided to go for a romantic breakfast (I'm aware no where is open yet) and a romantic walk in Iveagh Gardens (romantic park in Dublin.) She was delighted and we kissed and talked and hugged.

We left the apartment and once we got to Grafton Street she asked who I was. I was like, "Um... you know who I am, I'm walking you home so you can check in with you friends and then we're going for breakfast."

She started freaking out that the last 3 hours are a blank and that I raped her. I was like "WHAT THE ****" although I'm kind of used to psychos so I assumed if I walked her home things would be fine by then.

She ran away from me and I caught up with her and I said I wanted to call the police and talk to them about the situation. She said she'll tell them I raped her and ran away from me. I ran after her and caught up with her on Nassau Street. She was talking to some Mexican types crying and screaming. When she saw me she ran away. I asked them what should I do she's pretending I raped her and they were like she's clearly crazy ignore her she's talking bull**** but I can't ignore her.

Will she tell the next guy she's been raped twice this year? Once by the guy she told me about and another time by me?

Should I call the police about this? I only know her name and nationality, but she knows where I live and the company I own so I am freaked out about her making insane statements about me.

I do not want to leave myself open for a psycho bitch to have her mental fun with me.

What should I do? I'm totally freaking out. I promise everything that happened between us was HER IDEA and I stopped when she started crying.

I don't know what to do. I didn't rape her.

Hi
Relax and call the police tell them the story and see what they say

therecklessone

Rape Crisis Centre

1800 778 888

Esel

Giruilla wrote:

check your pockets, wallet etc? valuables in your gaf!!

Yeah, sounds lick a crock of merde to me. She and a 'French' guy 'accidentally' met you outside your apartment one hour later. You invite them in! The 'French' guy 'leaves', you comply with the perfectly normal hip-licking request, and soon get engrossed. Where is 'Frenchie' now? Maybe rifling your pad. As Giruilla said, check you haven't been robbed.

Write down everything that happened while it's still (relatively) clear in your mind. If you do go to the cops, might be better to omit the bit about smoking.

Metacortex

Go to the police and tell them everything that happened. She sound like a bit of a headcase.

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

Thaedydal wrote:

It could well be that the illegal drugs that were consumed messed with her memeory, and she can't recall correctly what happened.

exactly, because alcohol NEVER affects the memory and is a terrible date rape drug... no one ever uses it

fuzzywiggle

Go to the police. Tell them exactly what you've told us before she gives her own side of it.

Bob the Builder

Go to the Gardaí, make a statement. Contact the Rape Crisis Centre an tell them to record everything you say. Make sure you mention the grass part of it and tell them that if she come forward, compare the stories.

The issue that you should be concerned with is that these people expoit you by saying that you raped them. CHECK UR WALLET.

If you find something missing, contact the Gardaí, bank, or Insurance company. You then make yourself innocent.

The fact she consented to it, also makes you innocent! If she is lying or has had a memory loss, her story may be awfully screwed up, I understand you have a reputation to protect.

Dors1976

There are 3 of us after reading that and we are horrified, it really sounds like a set up. Personally we'd go to the Gardaí and we'd tell them EVERYTHING. Best to be honest coz if it ever went further then you were honest from the start. Best of luck.

Asiaprod

Thaedydal wrote:

It could well be that the illegal drugs that were consumed messed with her memeory, and she can't recall correctly what happened.

It would be a very good idea to make sure to REALLY clean your apartment.

SpAcEd OuT

I would personally leave the grass part out makes you look bad, also you could be done for supplying someone with drugs and depending on the guards you may have your house raided, I doubt the grass played much part anyway, most likely the alcohol if she did indeed suffer memory loss

Dirk Gently

unlike other posters I would not leave out the smoking grass part of it and I would only clean the apartment if I had a large amount of illegal drugs in it.

The police are not likely to be interested in your personal hash habit but they will become interested if you denied the use of it and they tested you and verified the opposite was true. Cleaning the apartment and leaving out details will only look bad on you and while not incriminate you will make you an unreliable witness. Why give your accuser ammunition to use against you. Stick to the truth and in future don't tell strange unstable girls you own a company. Find something else to boast about that doesn't involve you letting it known that you are an easy target for blackmail.

Huggles

All too much of a coincidence for me personally but I would go to the police and tell them everything. Sounds like a terrible situation to be in, best of luck with it.

LegacyUser

Hello this is the original poster. Thanks everyone for the replies.

I don't think it was blackmail or a scam. They didn't seem to know each other at all and nothing is missing. I'm nearly certain she's just an unstable freak.

I've slept on it and I think I will just put it down to a horrible experience and leave it at that. I know some poor fellow may have to go through this again with her, but I'm wondering if I really want the hassle of going to the police when I can just move on.

I can't understand why she would pretend she can't remember the last 3 hours. She wasn't particularily drunk or stoned. I wonder is she sitting at home feeling guilty or is she freaking out or what.

I didn't do anything wrong so my conscience is clear. If anything I was being extremely nice. I guess she saw I'm an easy target for whatever bull**** she was playing at.

UUgghh. OK I'm just going to try to forget about this and be more careful in the future.

Thanks everyone.

Any word back? I'm really interested to know if anything was stolen.

Tell them everything, especially the bit about the drugs. As if you don't, and they find out, it would make you seem guilty.

RoyalMarine

im not sure if thats the best thing to do.
to forget it and not tell the police could leave you exposed to looking pretty guilty if you dont do something about it.

why not ring that helpline number above and talk to someone there?
see what your options are and what "could" potentially happen if she does scream "rape" to the police.

to be honest when i read it i was shocked. but then again with the amount of wierd things that do happen im not completly surprised.

just make sure your ok, nothing is missing, and you deal with it in a sensible manner.

Victor

This is not legal advice

Consider writing everything down and posting it to yourself in a sealed envelope by registered post.

And/or go to a solicitor.

tom-thebox

i agree with victors comment above, although if you go to the cops be fully honest about the weed etc..

that really is screwed up, i feel for you man

AOR

what a physco, men of dublin beware!!!

Black Swan

Victor wrote:

This is not legal advice

Consider writing everything down and posting it to yourself in a sealed envelope by registered post.

And/or go to a solicitor.

Like if you were Stateside, this is where you would start first. We call them lawyers or attorneys.

Chucky the tree

If she cant remeber anything she wont remeber where you lived, so i wouldnt worry about it.


Personnally i would just leave it and see what happens. I wouldnt go to the cops myself.

Talliesin

nevf wrote:

Contact the Rape Crisis Centre an tell them to record everything you say.

They're a counselling service, not a recording studio. They don't record calls.

Good people to call if any issue around rape or sexual assault (whether you are a victim yourself or not) are causing you psychological distress. Wasting your time and theirs otherwise.

Dreamer 7

Wow crazy mare! I would definetly get my side of the story down with as many people in high regard as poss, guards, your GP and the rape crisis centre. You know that you are not guilty of raping her and it is bitches like that who stop real victims coming forward. The next person she does it to may not be as confident as you and it could easily ruin their life. She is a dangerous person and she must be stopped

Miss Fluff

I wouldn't involve the cops at this juncture. I'd make a preemtive strike and consult a solicitor asap though. This kind of thing makes me sick. It makes convicting actual rapists all the more difficult.

Velvet Vocals

Have you heard anything since? I'm really interested to know what happens?
It sounds like she was just being crazy but you never know, she might be affected by alcohol in that way, she gets blackouts and then freaks....... If so it must be horrible for her.
My advise for you though, try staying away from physco's for a while!

Wing Walker

Good God, is that what dating/hooking up/whatever in Dublin has been reduced to?:(

Good idea about the writing everything down and sending it to yourself by registered post. If nothing else, you'll have a more accurate account of what went on that night as opposed to just relying on memory.

Best of luck with your next night out.

LegacyUser

Saint Something wrote:

Have you heard anything since? I'm really interested to know what happens?
It sounds like she was just being crazy but you never know, she might be affected by alcohol in that way, she gets blackouts and then freaks....... If so it must be horrible for her.

Hi the original poster here.

No, I've decided to just let it pass. I don't think I want the hassle of going to the police. What if she decides to go with it and I have to go to court etc.? That would destroy me. People always think "no smoke without fire" and my life would become terrible.

I don't believe she had a blackout. She was not particularly drunk or stoned. Thinking about it I think the problem was that I was walking her home. Perhaps she lives with her boyfriend and was wondering what she can do to stop me from walking to her home? And she can use the rape excuse as an alibi if he asks her where she was. So I'm thinking if I just forget about it she will.

She'll do this again though. I'd like to be able to stop her (going to the police etc.) but I just don't want the hassle at this point in my life!!

Thanks everyone.

Metacortex

FreakingOut wrote:

Hi the original poster here.

No, I've decided to just let it pass. I don't think I want the hassle of going to the police. What if she decides to go with it and I have to go to court etc.? That would destroy me. People always think "no smoke without fire" and my life would become terrible.

I don't believe she had a blackout. She was not particularly drunk or stoned. Thinking about it I think the problem was that I was walking her home. Perhaps she lives with her boyfriend and was wondering what she can do to stop me from walking to her home? And she can use the rape excuse as an alibi if he asks her where she was. So I'm thinking if I just forget about it she will.

She'll do this again though. I'd like to be able to stop her (going to the police etc.) but I just don't want the hassle at this point in my life!!

Thanks everyone.

Think of the hassle if she goes to the police first and says you raped her. Its not worth it.
You should go to the police first and get your story in there.