How old is too old?

Juicebox

Im in a bit of a bother...theres this guy who wants to ask me out(got all the signs and taken the hints!!) but theres a 9 year age gap. Hes 27 and im 18. Now ive been workin with him for two years and weve gradually progressed to being pretty close going out for drinks etc. There was a period when i fancied him but put it out of my head because of the age gap. The complicated bit is that im a very mature 18 year old and look about 20 mabye,he doesnt look 27,more like 24 pushin it and doesnt exactly behave like a man approaching his 30's either So what are the limits is 9 years a bit too big an age gap? However i feel like that now i know he wants to ask me out that i fancy him,wheras if i didnt know he wanted to ask me out it wouldnt cross my mind because i had pushed it out of my mind....

Benny-c

Who Cares, give it a go, nothing to lose

Juicebox

U obviously for reading my post....u had to read the title to enter it and u care for replying!!

OmegaRed

My bro is in the smae boat cept shes 32 and hes 24. Ok thats 8 years but still......

She pretty much said this can happen. He's like, hold up lets give this a try and see where it goes.

I think in your situation its different cos the guy is older. I know thats gonna come back to bite me in th azz. If he's cool with it then i say go for it. You never know what come out of it! And at the end of the day if nothing does atleast it was a bit of fun....

as was already said to me today! JUST DO IT!!!!!

Supercell

If you feel comfortable with him and he with you, then just go for it, lifes too short, you are both adults and capable of making your own minds up.

You obviously know him reasonably well by now so not likely he's going to turn out to be a loon, just enjoy yourself

Nb someone else is probably going to say it so i'll get in there first..rule of two and seven -

18 x 2 = 36

36 - 7 = 29

He's 27 so bingo - yer compatable!!

I'm 20 and my bf is 31 - been seeing him since I was 19. Go for it.

Crucifix

Longfield wrote:

If you feel comfortable with him and he with you, then just go for it, lifes too short, you are both adults and capable of making your own minds up.

You obviously know him reasonably well by now so not likely he's going to turn out to be a loon, just enjoy yourself

Nb someone else is probably going to say it so i'll get in there first..rule of two and seven -

18 x 2 = 36

36 - 7 = 29

He's 27 so bingo - yer compatable!!

I hate to burst the bubble....but you'd subtract 7 then double your answer....giving her 22.

Supercell

Crucifix wrote:

I hate to burst the bubble....but you'd subtract 7 then double your answer....giving her 22.

Lol!!, either way is equally silly imho

Juicebox

So what 22 is the oldest i could go out with according to this rule at my age!!?

Supercell

Juicebox wrote:

So what 22 is the oldest i could go out with according to this rule at my age!!?

If you take rules like this seriously..then i'd say 22 is too old tbh.

Juicebox

Juicebox wrote:

So what 22 is the oldest i could go out with according to this rule at my age!!?

Don't worry about it - stupid rule. Just go for it or you'll always be wondering.

Juicebox

22 man im doomed so..haha well if i go for it and it turns out to be a complete shambles well then im stuck with him at work akward!!:(

takola

Like Bluewolf, Im 20 and my boyfriend is 32. I've been with him since i turned 19.. if you like him and ye get on well then definitely go for it!!!!

Dont be considering the doom of the relationship before its started! :rolleyes: You're only young!! Jobs come and go! You could be ran over by a bus tomorrow!!!

P.S. I am not insinuating that i want this to happen!

Zebra3

OP,

Go for it.

If it doesn't work out, finish it.

Laguna

Does age really come in to play after you're 18?. Choose to go out with him on the merits of who he is and what he's about, not his age.

Asiaprod

Juicebox wrote:

but theres a 9 year age gap.

Age got nothing to do with it. I am 13 years older than my wife. Met her in my 30s, blissfully happy (most of the time) and have a kid. Work is a bit iffy, so take care on that front. Life is a gamble, go for it.

Dirk Gently

I would be a bit more concerned about going out with someone from work rather than the age gap.

Done it twice and both times it got on my tits. Not nice working with your GF all day and then seeing her after work as well. Absence makes the heart grow fonder and all that. That’s just my experience though; other people might really like the whole living out of each others pocket thing (I even did for a while at the start). I wouldn't be worried about age at all though.

Ickle Magoo

When you are younger then an age gap is really significant...as you get older it matters less & less & then not at all....I think at 18 you may come up against certain issues regarding him being around for longer - but it's not always going to be a problem....I had a b/f who was 34 when I was 19 and after getting used to the initial strangeness of him having his own house & business while I was a student who had only flown the nest a couple of yrs - and the cavernous differences between our friends - mine did clubbing, his were married, had kids and did dinner parties, lol! We had a fantastic relationship.....and just think of all that extra experience & self-control Vs a teenage lad!

Like the others tho, I'd be wary about letting any work colleague have carnal knowledge of me....if the worst happened it may make your work life unbearable....:(

Talliesin

Longfield wrote:

Nb someone else is probably going to say it so i'll get in there first..rule of two and seven -

Everyone who believes in that rule should have a symbol branded on their foreheads so the rest of us can avoid interacting with them.

OP, there's an age difference. It's quite large. It decreases the chances of the relationship working. However no relationship happens in a vacuum and there are always factors working for and against them. If it seems to you that you could be on to a good thing, then don't worry about it.

b3t4

OP there is a difference of 20years between my uncle and his wife and they are blissfully happy with two lovely daughters. They met when she was 17-18.

Her parents had a similar age gap and met around the same age. Her parents were blissfully happy until her father died nearly two years ago now RIP

If it works, it works, if it doesn't then at least you know.

A.

fuzzywiggle

It's not that big of a gap, I say go for it! and good luck!

Crucifix

Crucifix wrote:

I hate to burst the bubble....but you'd subtract 7 then double your answer....giving her 22.

I dont understand that rule.

But I've always believed that age is but a number, its who you are and what you can do that counts really. If that makes any sense. So go for it.

coolmoose

im 22, my girlfriend is 32 - seriously, go for it, could be the best thing you ever do!

slumped

bluewolf wrote:

I'm 20 and my bf is 31 - been seeing him since I was 19. Go for it.

So in theory you may only have been going out for 1 day.

pepper

i was with a 24 year old when i was 17 and in the end the age did matter- but it could be diff with u 2

Cake Fiend

Well, the age factor shouldn't simply be ignored as some people like to suggest, but I'd say the more pressing issue is the fact that you work together.

neeviec

age really doesn't matter when you start going out with someone if it isn't working you just end it. When I was 18 I was going out with a guy who was 35. In reality I was a very mature 18 and he was an immature 35. We out until I was 22 that was when I realized I had actually outgrown him I wanted a good job and a decent house(he had his own house but it was a dive) and all he wanted was his holidays and DVDs. What I'm saying is give it a go age makes no difference but just make sure you don't waste your time when you are young, I stayed in every night with him and didn't go out with my friends when I was in college because he didn't like me going out without him(a seperate issue I know). I now regret this and often wish I hadn't been going out with him during this time but hey c'est la vie! Just make sure you don't grow up too fast if you go out with someone older.

Pythia

I went out with someone 8 years older than me. I was 19 when we started going out. It lasted just over a year.
The age gap was never a problem. (Although we had our fair share of other problems!)
Mainly I think this was the case as even though there was a big age gap, we were doing similar things. We were both students and both of us still lived off our parents. He had never had any majorly serious relationships, nor had I. Most of his friends were younger than him and also in similar postions. I think all this is why we were suited.
I'd have found it weird if let's say he had been working full time for many years, had a house and mortgage etc.

Emmo

Give it a try, if you think you are mature enough to make it work.

At last be mature enough to accept the chance of failure, every relationship has that so what have you got to lose?

Emmo

Marksie

At 18, the age gap between that and 27 is greater than say 24 and the equivalent in years terms: Not in terms of years, but in terms of experience.
One thing i learned was NEVER date people you work with.
Mind you i was 21 and in a relationship with a 30 year oild woman which lasted 5 years and we are still good friends 20 years later.

But i have worked inplaces where people have dated each other and OH boy canb the atmosphere be bad!

Buddy74

You should consult your 'close' friends on this matter the age thing should really matter unless he is old enough to be your father.

They might be able to point out some things that you have overlooked in your view with rose tinted glasses.

I would do it discretely as they might just end up taking the piss.

Black Swan

Depends on the two people. Date each other for awhile. Get to really know each other, inside and out. Travel together. Play house. Share each other's bad points through experience, not words. Good one's too. Most keep their best foot forward, but after awhile, they relax and become more themselves. Don't rush it.