Flirty Partners

LegacyUser

Does anyone here have flirty partners? How do you deal with it? Does it make you jealous sometimes?

RainbowBrite

No, I don't have, thankfully.

Would it make me jealous:- proabably, suppose it depends on the level of flirting

kaimera

I am.

and yes, it does make her jealous.

Not like I do it on purpose but being friendly can easily be mis_read.

ST*

Ah feck. I thought that said 'filthy' partners.

Never had problems on the flirty front. But I have accused of looking at someone in a flirty way roysh*...

Steoob

well i do it and my girlfriend gets very jealous, she doesn't normally do it but often has guys talking to her and i love the feeling i get when i step in and do a "she's mine" gesture..

shinners007

im the flirty type... it drives my man bananas. sometimes i do it out of habit or just to remind him how lucky he is;) however he and i both know it'd never go further than a mess.. we laugh about it.. jealously in a relationship only leads to problems.

plus is it not nice for some one to realise even though they are attached they can still caught someones eye or be hit on.. its a complement i think:D

flirting is one thing and shouldnt be sterotyped that one who flirts will in fact cheat.

Hermione*

Steoob wrote:

well i do it and my girlfriend gets very jealous, she doesn't normally do it but often has guys talking to her and i love the feeling i get when i step in and do a "she's mine" gesture..

Gotta love when a guy does that tbh, just so long as it's reasonably subtle

I've been told in the past that I'm quite flirty, but it's not something I do deliberately.

I'm not the jealous type so flirting doesn't bother me, there's no point to a relationship that doesn't have trust.

RoyalMarine

my ex did a lot. but she did it to wind me up...
it drove me mad with jealousy.

simple soloution is go to another pub/niteclub and ignore her all night.

she didnt do it anymore

podgewalsh

RoyalMarineComm wrote:

simple soloution is go to another pub/niteclub and ignore her all night.

come on man - that sounds like a complete waste of a night out TBH...surely you could have a bit of a laugh about it ?!?!?

Steoob

Hermione* wrote:

Gotta love when a guy does that tbh, just so long as it's reasonably subtle

I've been told in the past that I'm quite flirty, but it's not something I do deliberately.

I'm not the jealous type so flirting doesn';t bother me, ther'e so point to a relationship that doesn't have trust.

haha ya i just kinda slip in, put my arm around her and give a dirty stare to the guy haha works every time

AngryAnderson

Your other half is flirty? Dump him/her. It's childish mindplay and not becoming of someone who's mature enough to be in a relationship. Mind you... then there are people who other half's just friendly and chatty and they simply don't know the difference as they're jealous/insecure people anyway. Hmm. Eh, carry on.

DubNside

Surely when your out with your "other half" there's no need to go around being overly chatty or flirty with strangers who happen to be of the opposing sex? i.e GF flirting or chatting with a random guy while your up at the bar getting the drinks?

LegacyUser

Thanks for all the replies!

I am going out with a guy for the past 5 months. He had warned me that previous girlfriends had had a problem with him being flirty. I dont even know if its flirty-more like a charmer. He says he doesnt even know he is doing it-that he is just being friendly.

I have told him that any cheating and its over, no chances. He looked kinda hurt when I told him this. He says he loves me. I dont seem to be able to comprehend this flirting thing or what ever it is.

Whats worrying me more is that ive never had to deal with this on a continuing basis (am definately not jealous type), yes previous partners have flirted with girls a little, heck I do it to boost the old self esteem sometimes, but this is bordering on madness.

Ive asked him to tone it down a bit (we had a bit of an argument at the weekend about this) and explained to him that I dont know what partner, no matter who she is, would put up with it. And then he looks back at me all innocent "I didnt realise that I was flirting........"

Is there anyway around this, or is it just me? Dont want to be upset every fecking night we go out.

Ickle Magoo

Don't think there is a way around it.....

Some people have low self-esteem & boost it by getting attention from members of the opposite sex...they attract that attention by flirting....they may not even realise it's a pattern of behaviour they display....

Some people are insecure & flirt with members of the opposite sex to try and get their partner jealous or to try & instigate some kind of territorial display from their partner to make them feel more secure....

As AngryAnderson says, these are both games people play....and it can be very annoying to someone not wishing to - or needing to - play the game...

However, some people are uber-sensitive to their partners looking at or chatting to other people of the opposite sex - in which case it's not so much flirting as general friendliness which their partner is unable to handle without getting jealous or insecure....

Bottom line is if it bothers you, it bothers you....if he knows he does it and he is refusing to change - even to meet you half way, then you may be better off finding a partner who doesn't need to fawn over others or need to have others fawn over them to feel better about themselves....best of luck

BrenC

kaimera wrote:

I am.

and yes, it does make her jealous.

Not like I do it on purpose but being friendly can easily be mis_read.

Talliesin

My gf is flirty. It's great. She flirts, I flirt, sometimes we flirt as a team.

However I don't think it's a matter of us having the "right" attitude and you the "wrong" one. It's something people will always differ on.

Ickle Magoo

BrenC wrote:

Nothing wrong with being friendly - do you not think there is a difference betwen friendliness & flirtation tho? I am capable of being friendly to guy without flirting with him.....I think flirting has sexual undertones while friendliness is just that....one is a game in which to get attention, a partner, etc & the other is the ability to be warm, open & polite without introducing sexual undertones - quite a difference in my book....:)

Vegeta

Ickle Magoo wrote:

Nothing wrong with being friendly - do you not think there is a difference betwen friendliness & flirtation tho? I am capable of being friendly to guy without flirting with him.....I think flirting has sexual undertones while friendliness is just that....one is a game in which to get attention, a partner, etc & the other is the ability to be warm, open & polite without introducing sexual undertones - quite a difference in my book....:)

There is a huge difference here, I agree totally with Ickle Magoo.

I can definitely tell when a person is being flirty or just friendly and to be honest I never feel comfortable (as I have a girlfriend) speaking to people who are being flirty to me.

LegacyUser

Maybe Im the one with the problem. Thats kind of what I am trying to sort out in my head. But lots of people, including family and friends have told me that he is quite flirty - and this bugs me.

For example, the first time that he met my friends, I gave a gentle reminder (made a joke of it in effect) that he was not to flirt with my friends.

Few hours later I was watching him do his thing, and worst of all, one of my friends was flirting back. I said it to him that I was upset and again he said "But I swear I wasnt flirting, I was only being friendly".

He has the ability, maybe a gift on a fellas part, and I dont know how, to make women feel special. Im taking very special. Charmer like thing