Gay or Straight?

LegacyUser

I would really like advice, I'm 21 and I've very little sexual experience, I've never slept with a girl and I've 'scored' one or two the most recent was about three years ago, a very enjoyable experience and before that almost nothing.
When I was in fifth/sixth year I was obsessed with one girl and I thought about her constantly but nothing ever happened unrequited love and all the rest, very occasionally I bump into someone who I really like (women) but obviously nothing ever happens, I am not unusually shy and have a very good social life but I have a real fear due to inexperience with getting involved with a women and I tend to ignore them most of the time sticking strictly to my male mates, I'm not really attracted to any of my male mates but I do know which ones I consider good looking.
Recently I'm attracted to women less and less, and when I'm walking around I tend to notice men much more then women for instance I notice men that are good looking much more then women, I'm not sure if I am really aroused by them or not as I tend to mastubate and fanticise only about women. But this doesn't stop the fact that I notice good looking men, and sometimes even get a rush when seeing a good looking man, this is especially commen if I'm not sexually aroused, in normal everyday life.
I also feel that these feelings are becoming stronger as I age, when I was 18 or so it was strictly women, but recenty I seem to be noticing guys much more, as if I've given up on women especially if I'm not sexually aroused, but this makes it very difficult to meet women as I'm not really turned on by them in nightclubs etc. I seem to only get aroused by women when I want to masturbate and not in everyday life.
I've been thinking about going to Amsterdam recently and getting with a prostitute but I've a nagging feeling that it's not the best way to do things, anyway I'm hopelessly confused and I would really like to know if anyone has gone through similar experiences.

Beruthiel

have you considered the fact that you might be bi?

also
do you want me to move this to the L/G/B Forum? you can post unregged there too and the advice might be more helpful for you

BuffyBot

You might be bi. You might just be easily aroused..it can happen to anyone, and I know straight guys who can look at a guy and go "he's good looking", much the same way I can look at a woman and say "she's good looking" - it's quite possibly to appreciate others looks without being gay or bi.

I think the main problem for you seems to be your inexperience with women and strong feelings for certain women. You say you don't find women in nightclubs attractive like it's something bad. Not everyone does - plenty of people out there who wouldn't go near them or the people in them for love nor money. You need to think of new ways to meet women maybe outside the pub/club scene. New hobbies, courses, social groups might be a place to start.

As for sleeping with a prostitute, well I can't say I think it will particularily help. Even you don't sound convinced that it will. Even if (and that's a big "if") you are bisexual/gay, it won't make you any less so. It's just some random, meaningless sex.

Frankster4

"I seem to only get aroused by women when I want to masturbate"

i'd say you're not gay tbh. when you pop one for a bloke, then you might start considering you *might* be gay.

"it very difficult to meet women as I'm not really turned on by them in nightclubs etc. "

maybe you like more respectable women and would get turned on by other features beside from short skirts etc. everyone's prefrence is different

like the last poster said, do other stuff instead of clubs, etc.