A question regarding bullying.

TapouT

I have a phone video clip taken of a kid in my son's school being bullied. I asked my son about it and apparently this poor child (2nd year students) has a reception committee waiting to give him a beating at lunch and going home. On more than one occassion the security from the local Tesco's have had to escort him back to school.

I know that morally I should bring this clip to the attention of the school, and maybe even the guards. But I don't want this falling back on my son. Can I send it anonymously via an email without the authorities being able to trace it back to me?.

Please don't say I should have posted this in the personal issue's forum, I'm looking for more mature answer's than I'll get there, and answer's telling me if legally I'd be obliged to make my son give a statement regarding either the clip or the bullying.

I understand it that the clip is doing the rounds of the school, and he swear's he didn't take it. He says he was off school the day it was taken.

Jammer

I can't believe a grown person, an ADULT would be even considering not going to the appropriate athourities about this.

Imagine if it was your son getting a beating....how would you want someone in your shoes to act?

You're an adult, act like one.

TapouT

Jammer wrote:

I can't believe a grown person, an ADULT would be even considering not going to the appropriate athourities about this.

Imagine if it was your son getting a beating....how would you want someone in your shoes to act?

You're an adult, act like one.

read my post again please.

I've absolutely no problem bringing the clip to the attention of the authorities but my primary concern is it falling back on my son, who gave it to me!.

Now get real and read my thread properly please.

You really think I haven't thought about this childs parents?. I posted this in this forum to avoid the type of reply you've just given me.

maidhc

Your idea of an anonymous email isnt a bad one.

Go into a internet cafe, register a hotmail address and job done.

TapouT

maidhc wrote:

Your idea of an anonymous email isnt a bad one.

Go into a internet cafe, register a hotmail address and job done.

I never thought of the internet cafe idea. Thanks.

It really does concern me that this is brought to the proper authorities, however & I know it may sound selfish but my first concern is my son and keeping this away from him.

hullaballoo

TapouT, I have three major issues with this thread:

1. You are not supposed to be coming in here looking for legal advice, it's against the charter, and is dangerous for you and boards.ie in general;
   
2. You are not a moderator in this forum, so leave the thread moderation to those who are (i.e. don't presume to tell people what they can and cannot post in the thread, and don't ever tell anyone to "get real");
   
3. Posting in one forum where another is more appropriate is not allowed either, irrespective of your reasons. That means that you shouldn't post in here because you don't want PI answers. They would have just said the exact same to you anyway.

I'm not going to lock or delete this thread as I should simply because I don't like to hear about kids being bullied in school. I hope you resolve this the way you should. By the way, even if you marched into the school yourself and up to the headmaster and played the video for him, none of the kids are going to know it was you who did it and you look like far less of a coward than someone who anonymously emails it in.

TapouT

hullaballoo wrote:

TapouT, I have three major issues with this thread:

1. You are not supposed to be coming in here looking for legal advice, it's against the charter, and is dangerous for you and boards.ie in general;
   
2. You are not a moderator in this forum, so leave the thread moderation to those who are (i.e. don't presume to tell people what they can and cannot post in the thread, and don't ever tell anyone to "get real");
   
3. Posting in one forum where another is more appropriate is not allowed either, irrespective of your reasons. That means that you shouldn't post in here because you don't want PI answers. They would have just said the exact same to you anyway.

I'm not going to lock or delete this thread as I should simply because I don't like to hear about kids being bullied in school. I hope you resolve this the way you should. By the way, even if you marched into the school yourself and up to the headmaster and played the video for him, none of the kids are going to know it was you who did it and you look like far less of a coward than someone who anonymously emails it in.

1. Ok, I can except that I can't come here looking for legal advice, I wasn't expecting something I could take to court with me. I'm not sure how exactly to put it, but the advice I was looking for could probably be very loosely be termed "legal advice".

2. Had hammer read my post properly he'd have seen I wasn't trying to avoid what I know is my moral obligation and if I feel like asking someone to read something I posted again, for clarification, its my call. As for "get real", I apologise if thats against the policy of this forum.

3. I know I'm not a moderator here, and I wasn't trying to preempt a Moderator either. I do however Moderate on another board and know that having members abide by the rules makes my job much easier so I'll try take that into account in future.

Right, that being said I think this issue is finished with here. Have a good weekend chaps. I'm out of here.

Btw, if this thread really can be dangerous for the board, a Moderator is more than welcome to delete it. I'd understand completely.

hullaballoo

Well, as you pointed out yourself, the thread is not likely to cause too much damage because you were really just seeking to be advised on how to deal with a situation that, as you say, is not likely to ever reach a court. However, I cannot operate on double standards, so the same rules have to be applied equally. Thanks for your apology, that sort of modesty will hold you up as an esteemed contributor to the forum in future. Thanks again, and Happy Easter.

Eru

maidhc wrote:

Your idea of an anonymous email isnt a bad one.

Go into a internet cafe, register a hotmail address and job done.

Im absolutely baffled by why anyone would even be looking into this. Who exactly are you going to email this clip too?

Im also confused as too why the clip would be linked to your son if he didnt take it and its doing the rounds.

Lastly, Im very confused as too why you havent simple shown this clip to the headmaster and/or contacted the poor childs parents.

Bullying, in my opinion, is one of the hardest and most damaging thing a child, nay an adult, can encounter and I hope you take the steps needed.

besty

I would tend to agree with Jammer's analysis of the situation. I appreciate your primary concern is for your own child but you have a moral obligation to report this ASAP (or at least you should do.)

As Hullaballo said, the children involved will not find out your identity regardless so there isn't really anything stopping you. Don't even tell your own child that you're reporting it!

maidhc

Forgive me, but I see the OPs problem exactly. It is Ireland, things get around, and there is nothing worse for a child than to be called a snitch, gasbag, rat, and whatever else.

besty

maidhc wrote:

Forgive me, but I see the OPs problem exactly. It is Ireland, things get around, and there is nothing worse for a child than to be called a snitch, gasbag, rat, and whatever else.

But if it were reported in the correct manner, that would not be an issue. The OP's child need never know it has been reported, therefore sparing them any possible recriminations.

The clip is doing the rounds at the school so it is highly unlikely that it could be traced back to the OP/their son or daughter.

maidhc

besty wrote:

The clip is doing the rounds at the school so it is highly unlikely that it could be traced back to the OP/their son or daughter.

I know, but it could well come out that it was his/her parent that reported it. All the op is doing is informing the school, who may well be unaware of the problem (although they should be, sometimes things go unnoticed). He is fulfilling his moral obligation as far as I can see.

It is possible that the student population would find out eventually... e.g. a written complaint, or a written memorandum of the complaint could end up being the subject of an FOI request. Alternatively things just "leak", although they shouldn't.

Believe it or not I was asked before by a principal about whether setting up such a anonymous email/form script on a school website would be feasible.

Eru

Are you suggesting that theres an internal gossip brigade that could get information from the principal and back to a bunch of kids?

I find that hard to accept, afterall its only a phonecall to the principle, thats pretty easy to do.

maidhc wrote:

a written complaint, or a written memorandum of the complaint could end up being the subject of an FOI request.

Thats just silly. This isnt Morris or Barr were talking here.

maidhc

Karlitosway1978 wrote:

Thats just silly. This isnt Morris or Barr were talking here.

It can and does happen! never underestimate the resolve of a parent who *believes* their child has been wronged.

TapouT

Karlitosway1978 wrote:

Im absolutely baffled by why anyone would even be looking into this. Who exactly are you going to email this clip too?

Im also confused as too why the clip would be linked to your son if he didnt take it and its doing the rounds.

Lastly, Im very confused as too why you havent simple shown this clip to the headmaster and/or contacted the poor childs parents.

Bullying, in my opinion, is one of the hardest and most damaging thing a child, nay an adult, can encounter and I hope you take the steps needed.

Did you say your a guard in another post?. These are very simple questions to work out the answer's.

1. I intend emailing the clip to the school principle.

2. You should know yourself how crafty these scangers are, I'm absolutely NOT taking the chance that this will fall back on my son, as a guard you should appricate this.

3. Again another easy one to answer, refer to my original post and answer #2.

Bullying, I hate it. I detest bully's and do I feel for both the child and his family. But there's absolutely not a chance in the world am I letting this fall back on my son's shoulders.

Anyway, this thread has turned rediculous. I'm totally out of it now.

Jammer

The way i see it, if you son isn't involved, and he did get the clip because it was going round, then he has nothing to worried about.

On the other hand, if he was involved, he should get whats coming to him, and you shouldn't stand in the way because if kids get away with this kind of thing (it is assault at the end of the day), who knows what they'll go onto in later years.

Bullying is assault, assault is a crime. Some poor kid is going through a tough time for no reason, and you can stop it.

Eru

Tapout,
Yes I am a Garda as the thread concerning our knowledge of ballistics demonstrated, dont strat getting your knickers in a twist.

Tapout and Maidh,
I think your both being ridiculous. This is school yard bullying. There is no French resistence and the principle is not dirty, he isnt taking bribes.

there is absolutely no way in gods green earth that this will get back to 1 child simple because his father walks into the school. Parents do this daily.

The image is or is not in the publuic domain, which is it? If its within the publiuc domain then again, how and why would it be attached to your son?

Im finished, I think this thread is a piss take.

hullaballoo

Closed at the request of the OP.