'Friendship'

LegacyUser

Alright, so I've been through some VERY rough times lately.. But tonight, we were at my house and planning on heading to a club.. My friends wanted to go to some random guy (we hate) 's house, but I said we should head straight to the club.. So we ended up heading to that guys house even though I strongly didn't wanna.. So we get there (after the taxi dropped us miles from where we wanted to go and had to walk there) and find the patries over!

So I was raging! it was exactly how I said it'd go, and to top it all off, I'd paid most of the fare..

So we were trying to hail a taxi for ages, and none were stopping, even though their lights were on.. So I was raging, and they knew it, so I went for a piss, came back to find an empty bus stop! They'd gotten a taxi without me!

Now, I'm a strong believer in not leaving someone on their own, I've shown this to them many a time! Yet, they abandoned me!

Now, I'm at home after having the worse time ever!

So, who's right or wrong?

I don't think I can be friends with them any more, even though I've known them well for years! and stood up for them many a time..

Faith

Sometimes when people are very drunk, they act like assholes and lose all consideration for others. If this is the case with your friends, stop going out with them.

However, if they treat you like that when they're sober, then they obviously have no respect for you and they don't deserve to have your friendship. If so, drop them like hot potato cakes and go get yourself some new friends!

My friends at home have been my friends for so long that they totally take me for granted and it can be irritating. When I moved away and made new friends that treat me brilliantly, it really highlighted what my friends at home lack.

Oh, btw, you were right, but they were the majority...

ST*

Faith wrote:

However, if they treat you like that when they're sober, then they obviously have no respect for you and they don't deserve to have your friendship....

Drunk or sober thats not right. With everyone having a few drinks on board, her friends should have been even more so concerned for her welfare.
I'd be feeling very hurt by what they done right now tbh.

OP - true friends are supposed to care about you, not abandon and hurt you. I'd rethink my friendship with them.

ando

not on. Thats rough leaving you there on your own. Did they not even phone to say they were leaving, hurry up? Did you ring them and say wtf? Either way thats bad form

daiixi

It was bad form.. did they realise you were only going off for a minute? Could there be a possibility that they thought you had taken yourself off home??
Then again if you were "raging" as much as you say you were, can you blame them?*




*just a thought...

Heyes

OP im sorry but your "friends" behaviour was totally out of line. You need to say this to them aswell. Nobody should leave there friends alone, particularly in the middle of no where.

Some above said that it may be down to the fact that they were very drunk, i still dont think that excuse holds, yes we all do things when were pissed, many wander off for a little while and then return, but doing the above is totally out of line.

Yes you may have to re think your friendship with these people, however in my opinion the first thing you should do is tell them you were annoyed, and see how they respond.

Nevyn

Murphaph , he is already banned from this forum.
Learn to use the report post function rather then going off topic and breaking the forums rules yourself.
Thaedydal

LegacyUser

So I'm not stupid to think of this as such a big deal!

To be completely honest, I was seriously pissed off with the situation at the time, punching the bus stop etc, and I walked off around the corner.. I just went to the toilet and came back to see them gone! What annoyed me so much was that they didn't bother coming to talk and calm me down (as I have done many a time for them, aswell as jumping in and saving them from fights I'm not even involved in) but they just hopped in a taxi without even calling me. Like, nobody knew where we were, so the last thing you want to do is leave a friend alone there! They didn't even call me to say they're getting in a taxi and to just go with them, and they didn't even know if I had taxi fare or not.

I haven't spoken to either of them yet, although one of them sent me a message last night appologising saying that they thought I'd stormed off in a huff, but even if I did, you don't abandon someone in a strange area..

Femelade

jesus i'd be raging, yeah u were probably in a bad mood, no reason to leave you, its very inconsiderate and very dangerous too!

if i were you i wouldnt be bothered with them anymore, harder to say than do i guess if they are your only friends, but they would want to do some serious sucking up if they expected u to forgive them for that.

Heyes

Friend wrote:

So I'm not stupid to think of this as such a big deal!

To be completely honest, I was seriously pissed off with the situation at the time, punching the bus stop etc, and I walked off around the corner.. I just went to the toilet and came back to see them gone! What annoyed me so much was that they didn't bother coming to talk and calm me down (as I have done many a time for them, aswell as jumping in and saving them from fights I'm not even involved in) but they just hopped in a taxi without even calling me. Like, nobody knew where we were, so the last thing you want to do is leave a friend alone there! They didn't even call me to say they're getting in a taxi and to just go with them, and they didn't even know if I had taxi fare or not.

I haven't spoken to either of them yet, although one of them sent me a message last night appologising saying that they thought I'd stormed off in a huff, but even if I did, you don't abandon someone in a strange area..

The only positive thing that has come out of that, is at least they have recognised what they did is wrong. Just talk to them and say that kinda crap is not on, and to just cop on. You wouldnt have done it to them, so why would they do it to you,.... simple as.!

jesus_thats_gre

There would be slaps...

daiixi

tbh it sounds like you have a bit of an anger issue.. and your friends are just that, friends.. not your babysitter..

Nietzschean

daiixi wrote:

tbh it sounds like you have a bit of an anger issue.. and your friends are just that, friends.. not your babysitter..

regardless of an anger issue, you don't leave a girl in an unfamilar place by herself... you can be in a huff with her the following day for getting angry if you like but in a random location in the middle of the night isn't the time...

daiixi

Nietzschean wrote:

regardless of an anger issue, you don't leave a girl in an unfamilar place by herself... you can be in a huff with her the following day for getting angry if you like but in a random location in the middle of the night isn't the time...

Eh, I would and I know a lot of my friends would as well. But you're entitled to your opinion.

Hugh Hefner

Nietzschean wrote:

regardless of an anger issue, you don't leave a girl in an unfamilar place by herself...

I'm not sure it's a girl.

Doesn't sound like anyone was on top form that night. I say forget about it and in the future try to do things right, all around.

Femelade

yeah i dont think this person is a girl either (originally thought it was) but going on about "fights" and "hitting the bus stop", sounds like a guy with a bit of an anger problem perhaps....but in saying that, friends should still not have left him/her regardless.

The Sweeper

Friend wrote:

To be completely honest, I was seriously pissed off with the situation at the time, punching the bus stop etc,

Gotta say, if you were out with me and you started punching a bus stop because a party we went to was over when we got there, I'd leave you standing and get a taxi too.

I mean, anger management?

And for anyone who says "your friends shouldn't have left you there" - the only thing I'd say about that is if it was me I'd tell you you were acting like an ass and leave you there. Then again, I've no idea how big you are - there's a good chance if you're huge I'd just runawayrunawayrunaway!

TheVan

It is always awful to be let down by friends, even over something small.

The way your friends behaved would be disgraceful sober or drunk. Personally I wouldn't talk to people who treated me with such little respect and friendship. I wouldn't even do that to people I don't particularly like, even if i was pissed.

Obviously we don't know you and your friends but I would get away from people who treat you like that.

the_syco

Friend wrote:

I was seriously pissed off with the situation at the time, punching the bus stop etc, and I walked off around the corner..

<snip>

I haven't spoken to either of them yet, although one of them sent me a message last night appologising saying that they thought I'd stormed off in a huff, but even if I did, you don't abandon someone in a strange area..

It sounds like you had done that, from the first few lines, tbh. Also, if they were going to another party, after you "raging", they may have thought it'd be best to leave you there.

Canis Lupus

Agrees, I've been out with mates who go off on one and quite frankly I'm happy to leave em cos all they're doing is bringing everyone down to there level of misery and sometimes I'm not interested in having my night ruined and in turn I've been in a bad mood and been told to **** off by my mates.

You were in a bad mood, you got left behind, whoopie doo.

The OP

Friend wrote:

So I'm not stupid to think of this as such a big deal!

To be completely honest, I was seriously pissed off with the situation at the time, punching the bus stop etc, and I walked off around the corner.. I just went to the toilet and came back to see them gone! What annoyed me so much was that they didn't bother coming to talk and calm me down (as I have done many a time for them, aswell as jumping in and saving them from fights I'm not even involved in) but they just hopped in a taxi without even calling me. Like, nobody knew where we were, so the last thing you want to do is leave a friend alone there! They didn't even call me to say they're getting in a taxi and to just go with them, and they didn't even know if I had taxi fare or not.

I haven't spoken to either of them yet, although one of them sent me a message last night appologising saying that they thought I'd stormed off in a huff, but even if I did, you don't abandon someone in a strange area..

I know it's a hard fact to face, but most likely they don't like you. Don't bother with them anymore, because they probably take the piss out of you when you're not there too. NO mates would do that to someone.
Drunk or not, they knew exactly what they were doing, and saw that as a perfect opportunity to ditch you, by hopping in a cab when you left for a minute - and they obviously insisted on going to the party against your wishes, in case you decided not to go with them - it's blatantly obvious, and a common technique used to ditch the mate nobody likes. Meh - I've done it myself, but I usually don't care becasue it's someone I don't like!

And why would you all go to the house of a guy that you ALL hate? That doesn't make sense. Or is it just you who doesn't like the guy?

LundiMardi

if you went off with a temper tantrum then it's your own fault tbh.

LegacyUser

But the thing is, I'm always helping them out.. If one of them doesn't get into a club, I wouldn't go in.. If they need taxi fare and I have it, I'll give them it etc.

I was pretty pissed off at the time and I was pretty angry (and showed it) but I'm usually never like that, and they know it well..

I've sorted it out with one of them, gonna see the other tomorrow.. Fingers crossed!

Jonny Arson

LundiMardi wrote:

if you went off with a temper tantrum then it's your own fault tbh.

I think the OP had quite a justified reason to be pissed off in the first place. I certainly would be frustrated if my mates went against my word in saying that I didn't want to go that party and then to find out it was over.

Even if the OP did have a ''temper tantrum'' nothing takes away from the fact the OPs mates were total arseholes for going off without him/her. That was deliberate and if they can't admit that they were in the wrong there then I'd give them the elbow.

LundiMardi

they were assholes yes, so a tempter tantrum would make it all better?

If i don't want to go somewhere, i don't go.

Chinafoot

Sounds like there was wrong-doing on both sides tbh.

If you really didnt want to go to this party then you shouldnt have gone. Especially if it was going to ruin your night. However, it was hardly your friends' fault that the party was over so losing the rag, punching a bus stop and walking off without actually saying "i'm going for a p1ss, I'll be back in a minute" wasn't exactly going to achieve anything.

Having said that, I wouldn't leave my mate alone when there is drink involved, particularly not in an area they didn't know. In the past few weeks there have been two students who have gone missing after being separated from their friends after a night out, the more recent one was unfortunately found dead.

I do believe that friends should look out for each other, especially in situations like that. However, it also sounds like you have some anger issues that you need to sort out, instead of putting them on your mates when things don't go your way.

Beruthiel

The OP wrote:

I've no problem with you - I just find it funny that you thought you "pwn'd me" coz you'd seen my photo, but the joke was on you.

take your off topic comments elsewhere.
B