Women & Their Fantasies

LegacyUser

My partner is pretty much amazing at fulfilling my fantasies & she says she loves being able to do that for me, but when I ask her can I return the favor & help fulfil any of hers she says she has none - is it possible she's being honest with me & actually has none (as she's pretty frank about sex with me!!!) or do you think she has some but perhaps she's afraid to say?

If she is with-holding, how can I help her get to the stage where she'll tell me freely or is it a case I should relax, enjoy the fact I've a woman who caters to my every sexual need & whim whenever I want & just remember how bloody lucky I am????

- Confuzzeled!!!!

seamus

If she's fairly frank and open, then it's possible she just doesn't have any.

I don't have any. I do think it makes me weird, but you can't force yourself to have fantasies...

Actually, that said, I do think the existence of fantasies depends on the person whom you're with. For example, when I was single, a rendezvous with two random hot women would have been a fantasy, but I don't fantasise about having my girlfriend and another hot girl.

rsynnott

Eh, I don't have any; I don't think they're mandatory.

Ag marbh

None spring to mind either. Im just happy with what I get and don't crave any particular situation or anything.

Pretty normal not to have a specific one

metrovelvet

Fantasies I think are more a man's hobby. I wouldn't worry about. Just relax and enjoy....

jcoote

i think with women the whole sex thing is more sensual than it is in a blokes mind...

like my girlfriend is totally happy just lettin me lead the way and havin a cuddle afterwards,and i have had this with previous girls too...

thats not to say that a **** load of girls have fantasies that would drop a mans jaw

Nevyn

metrovelvet wrote:

Fantasies I think are more a man's hobby.

I certainly disagree.

Confuzzeled!

Have you ever tought that maybe in fulfilling your fantasies she is fulfilling her own ?

Beruthiel

metrovelvet wrote:

Fantasies I think are more a man's hobby.....

how wrong you are...

Blub2k4

Thaedydal wrote:

Have you ever tought that maybe in fulfilling your fantasies she is fulfilling her own ?

Bang on there ladydeath, I was thinking the same, maybe you are providing her with enough material, why bother having her own fantasies

Nevyn

It is not why bother Blub2k4 it could just be wonderfully for them that thier
giving and recieving is fulfulling both thier fantasies and she is having needs/wants/desires/kinks already met.

WhiteWashMan

i dunno really what the definition of a fantasy is.
i mean, there are certain scenarios or things that 'get me off', but to have my partner dress up in a cat suit, say 'meow' and let me call her michelle pfieffer is not something i need to be fullfilled (although, it might be nice:))

so what the definition of a fantasy?

i have always wanted to make love in a certain position, or in a certain location. i think those are more just turn ons than fantasies.

rsynnott

WhiteWashMan wrote:

i dunno really what the definition of a fantasy is.
i mean, there are certain scenarios or things that 'get me off', but to have my partner dress up in a cat suit, say 'meow' and let me call her michelle pfieffer is not something i need to be fullfilled (although, it might be nice:))

so what the definition of a fantasy?

i have always wanted to make love in a certain position, or in a certain location. i think those are more just turn ons than fantasies.

Anything which falls outside the norms of human sexuality, I think. Either a fetish, or a scenario fetishised.

murphaph

Thaedydal wrote:

Have you ever tought that maybe in fulfilling your fantasies she is fulfilling her own ?

In a submissive sorta way maybe. One never knows.

Nevyn

It doesn't have to be submissive at all, some people just like to please and thank the gods for them.

metrovelvet

Thaed and beruth -

Can you say more? Are you guys the exception that proves the rule?

Which ones would you say are most common among women?

IMO people often dont realise just how much control you are in when you are the one doing the pleasing. It may seem submissive but ..... I think its the opposite.

jcoote

are u saying your in control when being submissive???

rsynnott

http://deviantdesires.com (So NSFW you wouldn't believe it)

jcoote

thats a good site...

fetishes come from primal emothions or fears so anything can be a fetish....

one bloke was obsessed with ring cos his mother used to let him turn her wedding ring when he was in her arms as a child...in turn he had women wearing up to 5 rings on each finger during his sexy time wit them

anything folks anything

metrovelvet

Im saying when you're the one giving, you're in control.

I dont think its submissive.

jcoote

ah the penny just dropped yeah your right in a way

if someone say to u 'do this now' your in control of how its done is that it???

very good

jcoote

explain??????

metrovelvet

No that's not it. Not quite.

Wurly

Your girlfriend, eh? Jcoote? Ha, very interesting indeed.

Nevyn

Tri off topic and unhelpful posts will get you banned from this form.
Do read the charter and abide by the rules.
Have a nice day.
Thaedydal

The Corinthian

metrovelvet wrote:

Can you say more? Are you guys the exception that proves the rule?

They’re not. Trust me, they’re not.

Which ones would you say are most common among women?

I don't think any one man (or woman) would know what is the most common fantasy, but were I to guess I would suspect it might be a less extreme form along these lines.

jcoote wrote:

one bloke was obsessed with ring cos his mother used to let him turn her wedding ring when he was in her arms as a child...in turn he had women wearing up to 5 rings on each finger during his sexy time wit them

That is more an example of a paraphilia or fetish rather than a fantasy
(paraphilias are far more compulsive than fantasies) - the example you gave is actually a textbook example of this. And, AFAIR, it was his aunt, not his mother.

brown*eyed*girl

Fantasies are different to fetishes in my opinion but suppose can often merge together at times. Most people fantasise about different sexual encounters or scenarios in their lifetime. I often fantasise about having sex with total strangers on a train or a really sexy plumber who’s come to fix something in my “house”:eek: . This is the opposite to reality for me and something I’d probably never do but its nice to fantasise about it as it’s a turn on. As they say some fantasies are best kept in your head. Then there are some fantasies that I would do and have done which I’m not saying here. To the OP just enjoy it as it is because if your partner is open and honest then I’d doubt she’d keep quiet if she wasn’t satisfied. Also things may change. I mean the fantasies / fetishes you have when you’re younger change as you get older and more experienced. Just enjoy and keep the lines of communication open both ways.

metrovelvet

The Corinthian wrote:

I don't think any one man (or woman) would know what is the most common fantasy, but were I to guess I would suspect it might be a less extreme form along these lines.

Ok TC I'll trust you.

Is that a womans fantasy or a man's fantasy of a womans fantasy life?

I would still guess they are more common among men then women, though Im not saying that women dont have them. Im not saying I dont have them either.

But I would still guess that its a mans preoccupation, and this could partially be due to cultural permissions women give and dont give themselves. Or perhaps because men are supposedly more visual.

The Corinthian

metrovelvet wrote:

Ok TC I'll trust you.

You shouldn’t really...

Is that a womans fantasy or a man's fantasy of a womans fantasy life?

The former, I’d imagine, given that a woman wrote it.

I would still guess they are more common among men then women, though Im not saying that women dont have them. Im not saying I dont have them either.

I don’t know if more men have fantasies than women and unless you’ve a lot of experience with both, I suspect neither have you.

metrovelvet

Its the audience and not the writer we should focus on. But yes I see your point.

BTW - I was responding to your statement when I said Id trust you.
They’re not. Trust me, they’re not.

So when you retort by telling me not to trust you are you effectively telling me your full of ****?

I didnt understand your last sentence. You suspect I havent got a lot of experience with neither men or women? Ok suspect away.

The Corinthian

metrovelvet wrote:

Its the audience and not the writer we should focus on. But yes I see your point.

Actually, it was a woman that brought me to see it.

BTW - I was responding to your statement when I said Id trust you.
They’re not. Trust me, they’re not.

So when you retort by telling me not to trust you are you effectively telling me your full of ****?

Relax. I was being flippant.

I didnt understand your last sentence. You suspect I havent got a lot of experience with neither men or women? Ok suspect away.

No, I said with both; men and women - and by your own admission you don’t lick the wrong side of the stamp.

So, unless you have some reputable research you’d like to share with us, you’re basing your assertion on your own experiences; the men in your life and yourself representing women. And last time I checked, one was not considered a very good sample size.

Gaz

If you use a feather its kinky but try using a chicken just once ... suddenly labled a fetish ... go figure !

metrovelvet

The Corinthian wrote:

Actually, it was a woman that brought me to see it..

Based on what you saw, would you say that it was more for your or her arousal? I havent seen it, btw.

Given the immensity of the porn industry and of hollywood, compared with one small independent film, I think we can see that there is a far greater market for male fantasy. Which is suprising because I thought men liked getting women horny, youd think this instinct would be present in out entertainment fields.

The Corinthian wrote:

Relax. I was being flippant...

Ok. Im relaxing.

The Corinthian wrote:

No, I said with both; men and women - and by your own admission you don’t lick the wrong side of the stamp.
.

Yes, lol thats true, but its still taboo among women to talk about like female masturbation, which indicates to me that there is still something very hushed about it. Women talk about everything else in sordid detail with each other, but not these things, imo.

Hey what do you think of my invention of postal stamps and envelopes that taste like women?

The Corinthian

metrovelvet wrote:

Based on what you saw, would you say that it was more for your or her arousal? I havent seen it, btw.

Actually, based on what she told me. That’s why she brought me to it in the first place.

Given the immensity of the porn industry and of hollywood, compared with one small independent film, I think we can see that there is a far greater market for male fantasy. Which is suprising because I thought men liked getting women horny, youd think this instinct would be present in out entertainment fields.

I wouldn’t confuse masturbation with sexual fantasy. Anyhow, the reverse is true in the sexual aids industry.

Ok. Im relaxing.

I see...

Yes, lol thats true, but its still taboo among women to talk about like female masturbation, which indicates to me that there is still something very hushed about it. Women talk about everything else in sordid detail with each other, but not these things, imo.

It’s not like men discuss these things all that often either.

Hey what do you think of my invention of postal stamps and envelopes that taste like women?

Only if I can still use them to floss.

metrovelvet

The Corinthian wrote:

I wouldn’t confuse masturbation with sexual fantasy. Anyhow, the reverse is true in the sexual aids industry..

Me neither. Im only correlating them in the sense that they are taboo for women still. Because for the woman to be the starting point of desire is still to some extent unthinkable.

The Corinthian wrote:

It’s not like men discuss these things all that often either...

But given how much detail women offer each other about everything else... its a telling silence.

For example, we can all say that two women is an across the board fantasy for your average straight male. Why do we all know this? Because men talk about it all the time. What do we know about womens? [Other than spanking thanks to your educational instruction today].

Your flossing rebuke... is that as dirty as I think it is?

simu

There are loads of books out there on the topic of women's sexual fantasies tbh. Surely their existence can't be news?!

Nevyn

There are several publishing lines as well, written by women for women.

The Corinthian

metrovelvet wrote:

Me neither. Im only correlating them in the sense that they are taboo for women still. Because for the woman to be the starting point of desire is still to some extent unthinkable.

In Saudi Arabia, perhaps.

For example, we can all say that two women is an across the board fantasy for your average straight male. Why do we all know this? Because men talk about it all the time.

That’s more a question of male bravado rather than fantasy. Men talk about it to prove to other men that they’re alpha males.

Although in the case of a threesome it’s probably a fantasy too.

What do we know about womens? [Other than spanking thanks to your educational instruction today].

It tends to be less visual and more situational.

Your flossing rebuke... is that as dirty as I think it is?

Why? Was it in poor taste?

metrovelvet

The Corinthian wrote:

In Saudi Arabia, perhaps.?

Yes, because the imagination police and the ghosts of self conciousness dont ever ever haunt Irish women. :rolleyes:

The Corinthian wrote:

That’s more a question of male bravado rather than fantasy. Men talk about it to prove to other men that they’re alpha males..?

So the speak around male fantasy as about assertion of rank/power rather than a subject of pleasure or are you saying the they are linked?

The Corinthian wrote:

It tends to be less visual and more situational...?

Say more.

The Corinthian wrote:

Why? Was it in poor taste?

I think thats for you to tell me....:p

Nevyn

Ok at this stage this wandered well away from the ops questions.
I suggest that those wanting to continue thier disscusions do so in a more fitting forum.