I think I fancy him..

No_Regrets

Well I met this guy the other day, in a kinda awkward situation as family were around, but I got the vibe that he might have fancied me. I have been single for quite a while and am not the flirty type but I smiled and tried discreetly to let him know I liked him. Anyway, I had to leave very soon after we met but he suggested we meet up (in a friendly sense really) next weekend and said we should exchange emails, which we did. I left by saying "talk to you soon" and to be honest, I have been having a tough time thinking about anything but him since then. He left SUCH an impression on me and I have never felt this before...I haven't even really had anyone on my mind in a long time. I keep hoping he'll email but I feel so nervous and unsure and I am trying my best not to set my sights too high. I have more or less decided I will take the plunge and contact him in a couple of days to say I would like to meet up if I don't hear from him. I know it's foolish and girly, but I have been hurt before and I guess that is what is making me so confused and worried about really going for it. Any advice would be really appreciated, thanks.

Sandals

Why don't you do the right, honest yet scary thing.

e-mail him that above post exactly.

magick

Fortune favours the bold.......
life is short ,
go for it and good luck

Rabies

Email addresses were exchanged. Why are you waiting on him to email you?
It isn't up to the guy to do all the chasing.

LegacyUser

No_Regrets wrote:

but I have been hurt before and I guess that is what is making me so confused and worried about really going for it.

Send him an email. Most of us have been hurt at one point or another, but you cant tar every guy with the same brush.

Give yourself a chance to be happy.

Fanny Cradock

it's not like your entire chance of happiness is contained within an email. so what is there to worry about? why don't you email him today? you dont have to pour out your feeelings in the email. just a simple "hello, how are you doing?" if you wait a few days you will just be putting more pressure on yourself.

No_Regrets

Yes, I know that guys should not and don't have to chase all the time, the problem is my nervousness about this kind of situation because I haven't been made to feel attractive in a good while and I hope I wasn't picking up the wrong kinda vibes!! I think I will go for it though. Something tells me he is worth the chance.

Fanny Cradock

yeah, i hope you are right, op. not all guys are assholes. we aren't all out to hurt you - bear that in mind.

be positive. be confident.

good luck!

Heyes

Sandals wrote:

Why don't you do the right, honest yet scary thing.

e-mail him that above post exactly.

Do not email him the above, that is something you talk about when you are together, not on the first port of contact you have together.

Email him this afternoon to see how he is, and then arrange a meet up at the weekend.

Hope it works out for you girlie let us know how you get on

stovelid

Hi

Do NOT email the OP in it's entirity However, with no other qualifications except being a bloke; i can say that it would have been great at many times when i was single for a woman to make contact first. He may not have been in contact yet for many innocuous reasons and might be really pleased to hear from you.

Although it takes courage to make the first move, i can't believe that anybody would favour "not knowing" over taking the chance in a situation where your feeling are so strong.

Do it!!

Femelade

i agree with heyes on that one, dont email him your post, do u want him to run a mile?, just keep it simple and to the point. do it this eve or 2moro, its not up to guys to make the first move anymore.

best of luck.

-Femmy

metrovelvet

Email him and give him a compliment. Even if it goes no where you will make him feel good and he will like that.

I met someone a few weeks ago and they sent me an email telling me they have never met anyone as lit up as me. I was so flatterred because I thought it was an unconventional compliment and also genuine.

Dont lay your heart on your sleeve.

Just say how cool it was meeting him and say something nice to him. But dont email him your OP - its too vulnerable and he is after all a stranger at this point.

MercMad

Email him something simple and short like " Hi how's it going, really looking forward to the long weekend...........any plans ? "...........or something to that effect !

Good luck !

omb0wyn5ehpij9

OP, e-mail him! You have nothing to lose! IF he doesn't reply, then you have lost nothing If he reply's, then ask him about meeting up. Best of luck

No_Regrets

I did it!! I emailed him a few moments ago and was friendly and nice and told him if he still wants to meet up this weekend, to let me know. I also complimented him by saying that I was happy to meet him. I know I have nothing to lose, but I also know if I hear nothing I'll be pretty sad, but like some of you have already said, it is a FAR better thing to give it a go than to just let it go. Here's hoping! I will let you know if/when I hear from him, thanks for all of your replies, xx.

Heyes

No_Regrets wrote:

I did it!! I emailed him a few moments ago and was friendly and nice and told him if he still wants to meet up this weekend, to let me know. I also complimented him by saying that I was happy to meet him. I know I have nothing to lose, but I also know if I hear nothing I'll be pretty sad, but like some of you have already said, it is a FAR better thing to give it a go than to just let it go. Here's hoping! I will let you know if/when I hear from him, thanks for all of your replies, xx.

Ah good women, at least you ll know either way. Hopefully its all for the positive.

Let us know how ya get on

Eminem

Wait awhile and see if he e mails you he should if not make the first move yourself if you want

Best of luck

Eminem

No_Regrets

Well, it has now been about a day since I emailed him and I have heard nothing back...I don't want to be freaking out and I suppose everyone does not check their emails everyday, but I am a little disappointed he hasn't replied. Ah well, I suppose it still is early days!

johny28

Heyes wrote:

Do not email him the above, that is something you talk about when you are together, not on the first port of contact you have together.

Email him this afternoon to see how he is, and then arrange a meet up at the weekend.

Hope it works out for you girlie let us know how you get on

Yea. this is the most logical approach among all the other opinions.

Because, that way it will sound more natural and it's better to take it step by step.

Fanny Cradock

well no matter what happens you did something positive. whatever happens with this guy it's a step it the right direction for you.

ferdi

good on ye. try and put it out of your head for now, you've done all you can. if he dosnt write back, **** him - its his loss.

No_Regrets

Hey, thanks again for all your replies, although there has been none from him and I am kinda sad...but he's not worth it if he doesn't even have the common courtesy to reply to a nice, friendly email. We'll see, I will let you know if anything changes, but either way I don't regret it (cue my nick, lol!). Happy Paddy's Day to one and all!!

illicit007

Being a typical man I hear a problem and I want to fix it by telling you everything you SHOULD do. I even have this great link to this killer website that has a free mailing list for single women.. but something up and it isn't loading right now but maybe later.

Anyway... I've been in the same situation before with girls and I'm sure I've put many girls there too. It kinda sucks waiting with baited breath and excited anxiety hoping any moment your whole life will be turned upside down with a really great happy event and the excitment will just grow. There is still a chance I mean I basically live with my computer, I can't decide if I love it or my girlfriend more... :-) But I didn't check my email for two whole days.. so maybe you know.

LAstly, my two cents, get out there more! Date more guys casually. Get better at being flirty and attractive and soon you'll be able to handle these situations easier. Seriously. I didn't have any luck with women until recently and that was only because I tried hard for years before it all started to click into place and I felt chicks actually fancy me more now than the majority of guys out there. find another guy, then start another post ok! ;-)

No_Regrets

Well, so I saw him last night, randomly and my friends were there too. We chatted and he was being quieter, he said he had only received my email that day, blah blah blah. I doubt that was true. He said to me he was happy that we had bumped into one another, but I knew he wasn't as comfortable as the last time. Then his girlfriend rang him, his gf of four years, who he lives with!!! I pretended like I was fine about it, but obvioulsy it was the last thing I expected. He did not send out any vibes to that effect before then. I am pretty sad today I have to say. He is a great guy, funny, intelligent, open-minded but he's taken and I have a feeling that he knows that I am attracted to him. I think I dealt with things fairly well though and I am pretty sure he respects me, but it just puts me in a situation where I am even more at a loss to the thinking of men. I don't get it. I am sad. I want someone to love me as I have lots of love to give (cheesy and clichéd as that may sound, it is very true).

metrovelvet

Well thats dissappointing. It sounds like this meeting was self concious?

This isnt that baffling. Men will flirt even if they are taken, even if they are in the presence of their other halves. Did you ask him by the way if he was married or spoken for when you had your first encounter? You need to ask this if they dont volunteer the info.

What you need is more men in your life who you know casually. You dont have to sleep with them, but you should be around them. Like what illicit says. Hes absolutely right.

Keep your feet on the ground and dont let yourself get swept away by them. They are just guys and theres plenty of fun to be had in this big wide world.

stovelid

and women won't? :0)

Sorry to hear what happened noregrets. I hope it won't put you off taking the initiative in future.

metrovelvet wrote:

This isnt that baffling. Men will flirt even if they are taken, even if they are in the presence of their other halves

Zombrex

No_Regrets wrote:

Well, so I saw him last night, randomly and my friends were there too. We chatted and he was being quieter, he said he had only received my email that day, blah blah blah. I doubt that was true. He said to me he was happy that we had bumped into one another, but I knew he wasn't as comfortable as the last time. Then his girlfriend rang him, his gf of four years, who he lives with!!! I pretended like I was fine about it, but obvioulsy it was the last thing I expected. He did not send out any vibes to that effect before then. I am pretty sad today I have to say. He is a great guy, funny, intelligent, open-minded but he's taken and I have a feeling that he knows that I am attracted to him. I think I dealt with things fairly well though and I am pretty sure he respects me, but it just puts me in a situation where I am even more at a loss to the thinking of men. I don't get it. I am sad. I want someone to love me as I have lots of love to give (cheesy and clichéd as that may sound, it is very true).

Hey head up.

You meet a nice guy, you got on with him, you asked him out, then you found out he had a girlfriend. Nothing to be embrassed about. And certainly no reason why he, or anyone else, wouldn't respect you.

Sounds like you handled the situation very well, and he sounds like a bit of a dick for ignoring your email (if thats what he did). He should have just said "flattered but taken".

Out of the whole thing you handled it in a mature normal fashion.

No_Regrets

Thanks again for the replies...today I am already feeling better about things and I know I deserve better than this kinda guy. Hopefully someday I will meet him and not be scared to give things a shot!!

TomBeckett

Oh if only there were more women in the world like you!!
There is nothing as nice as a women making the first move:)
I dont know why its always left up to us to do that:eek:
There is this girl ive fancied for ages and still cant get up the courage to ask her out some day i prob will providing that i can just stop the palpatations every time that i see her..

anyway sorry things didnt work out for you this time. all the best..

Zombrex

TomBeckett wrote:

Oh if only there were more women in the world like you!!
There is nothing as nice as a women making the first move:)
I dont know why its always left up to us to do that:eek:

Amen to that!

No_Regrets

Aww thanks, but I doubt I am the only woman to have ever made a move and I am proud of myself. Take it easy.