A Day In The Life Of A Zookeeper

willowmegs

hi everyone. im in 6th yr and doin honours english. umm...working on essays right now and had this one for my homework. so..hope ya like it. looking forward to comments..

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My name is Paul and I am delighted to be given this opportunity to tell the readers of Wild Animals magazine about my everyday life as a zookeeper in San Diego zoo.
My day begins at 5am. I awake from my deep slumber and slap my ringing alarm clock. I feed my dog, Larry, and make myself some toast and tea. My movements are quick as I must be at work for 6am in time for the animals' breakfast feeds.
My house is a twenty minute car journey from the zoo. There is hardly no traffic on the highway at this time of the morning. The early sun warms me through the windscreen. I reach the gates of the zoo and find my parking spot. I head to the store rooms to collect the buckets of food and scraps for the animals. A quick glance at the roster tells me that this morning I am in charge of making sure the monkeys, the giraffes and the lions get their breakfast.
First I head to the monkey house. It's a large cage with railings and bedding. I can hear them calling to each other and screeching as I make my way down the path. I unlock the side entrence and place their food down. They are ecstatic and screech with delight, huge smiles almost showing their full set of teeth. While they tuck in, I set about cleaning their cage and removing the mess and banana skins from the evening before.
When I've finished with that, I return to the store room to collect the food for the "fierce" lions. To me, they are not at all fierce, but they have grown accustomed to all the staff here now. They can be at times wary of visitors, especially those who try their best to receive a negative reaction!
On my way to the lions pen, I pass the cheetahs and the leopards. They are relaxing in the hot morning sun, enjoying the rest of the quiet time before the influx of visitors arrive after 9am. Again I unlock the side entrence to the lions pen and slowly step in. I move slowly and cautiously, I do not want to disturb them. The cubs are still small and curiously run over to me. I distribute the food which is mainly meat and leave.
It's almost 8am now and I have, finally, the giraffes to feed. Once again, I collect their food and make my way to their sector. We have many giraffes here in the zoo and they are very popular with our visitors.
At 9am, the gates open to the public. I go to catch a morning snack and a cup of coffee in the staff canteen. I also like to read the daily newspapers on my break.
Throughout the morning until lunchtime, I walk around the zoo, keeping a sharp eye on the members of the public and our animals. Our visitors mainly consist of school kids on field trips. We always make sure they have a great time here.
At lunchtime, I return to the canteen where I enjoy my meal of fish and chips and another coffee. I chat with fellow workers of how our day is going and if we are receiving any new animals. Last week we were lucky enough to receive a baby panda and there was huge excitement all around. John has been looking after the cheetahs today, one is poorly so the vet had to be called. Our zoo holds so many animals that it is convenient to have our own vetinery on site.
At 3pm, I return to work and distribute food and scraps to the monkeys, giraffes and lions. They seem to be in great form and are enjoying all of the attention from the visitors. The feeding and cleaning trip takes two hours like this morning and I am usually a bit tired afterward. At 5:30pm I start to get ready to head home.
The highway is always a nightmare at this time and the journey home can usually take around an hour. Once I'm in the door, I feed my dog and make myself some dinner. Sometimes I'm too tired to prepare something nutritious so I order a pizza or some Chinese food.
I spend the rest of my night watching tv and catching up with friends. By 9pm I can no longer keep my eyes open so I head for the safe cosy sanctuary of my bed to rest my body for another early start.

is_that_so

Nice personable style but there are a few errors in grammar and spelling which stand out. The simple sentence style makes it very readable but there are some sentences that would be better combined.

Overall I'd look at it as a draft and consider rewriting it. Try reading it aloud to yourself and see which bits work. I would also consider combining some of the sentences.


Grammar

There is hardly no traffic on the highway

It's almost 8am now and I have, finally, the giraffes to feed

Throughout the morning until lunchtime,

I chat with fellow workers of how our day is going

Punctuation

lions pen

Spelling

entrence

There is hardly no traffic on the highway at this time of the morning.

There is hardly any traffic on the highway at this time of the morning.

Unless you meant it like that

Yeah, as is_that_so pointed out, you did make some mistakes. If you're doing honours for the Leaving I'd advise you to carefully read over your essays. And practice more.

willowmegs

Thanks. Yeah we are practising techniques etc in class, we had to write a short story prompted from one of the images on our pre for homework. Thanks again.

BossArky

So what did I think? When writing an essay it is usually good to start with a question. This gets the reader engaged in what is to follow. See, I started with a question and you wanted to see what I thought! Try it - readers have to think about what you are writing as opposed to breezing through.

lizzyd66

I would say nicely written (apart from the spelling/grammatical mistakes - not my forte either!) but.... I do feel that you have told us about a day in the life of any zookeeper not one in particular - you haven't got inside his head - what makes him unique, did he want to be a zookeeper, does he get on with his boss, does he get pissed off with the commute etc etc. Little personal touches would make it more interesting. Good luck with the exams!