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Dismissed by psychologist

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  • 03-03-2006 10:00pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 125 ✭✭


    Hey guys,

    Just a bit of background; I’m a 23 yr old male. I am currently enrolled in a night college course after giving up modelling (in order to have a less pretentious job!) having modelled all over Europe and the US . (A lot of you would probably recognise me from a TV ad I did a few years back for a fragrance.)

    Basically, I feel that I’m breaking down and might be developing paranoid schizophrenia. After a long struggle of whether or not to seek treatment and swallow my pride, I decided to take the step and speak to a doctor. I told him that I was depressed and anxious and he then referred me to a psychologist. I had been seeing the psychologist a few times when I decided that it was time to fully open up and tell him about my experiences. What I feared was that I wouldn’t be taken seriously because on the outer picture-perfect exterior everything seems rosy but its the complete opposite of the internal hell I inhabit inside.

    Like I said, I had been seeing him a few times. From the moment I met him I got a bad vibe off him. This was confirmed during the sessions by his intellectual arrogance and constant use of psycho-babble and metaphor after metaphor just to sound impressive. He was always referring to how young I was, like ‘oh you’re probably too young to understand this’ or ‘you’re probably too young to have experienced this’ etc. He even once referred to me as ‘just a kid’ once. (So much for doctor-patient rapport!). It was not too expensive so I just decided to stick with it and saw it as my opportunity to get help.

    After a few sessions I decided it was time to open up- to hopefully get some help and get my life back on track.
    So I decided to write down everything about what I was going through over a week. I thought about it long and hard and gave what I wrote a lot of thought. It was all or nothing and I chose to tell all. I thought it would be worth it and would be easier to get it all out rather than have it being dragged out of me over weeks and weeks.

    Well to be honest, it seems to have been a big mistake and being one of the most humiliating experiences of my life.

    I presented with the full story on paper and at first he recognised that I had a serious problem and then started explaining it with vague psycho-babble like ‘this is probably due to the that fact that you unconsciously suppressed issues during your childhood and due to the traumatic event these have surfaced’. I was just like saying to myself wtf, all this theorising ‘till the cows come home - how is this going to help me or help me understand what is going on and how I can get better. These silly theories hold as much evidence as saying that aliens abduct me while asleep and plant these ideas in my mind.
    For him everything seems to go back to the childhood. If I’m anxious its because of the loss of my father when my parents split up. In my view it is of no use explaining an unknown with another unknown.


    When I was being told this, I just thought to myself, ‘here I am taking the big step as hard it is to try and get better and I’m basically dismissed and have everything thrown back in my face’. That moment all hope for the future just faded away and just wished to be dead as that seemed like the most logical thing to do. My thinking was ‘Like if I can’t even get recognition for the problem how am I ever going to get better so what’s the point in going on with this charade.’
    Here I was making my cry for help and deciding if I was going to tell something I might as well be all or nothing – all the strange and excruciatingly embarrassing delusions I have. For someone who hold his cards firmly against his chest and does the stereotypical macho thing about never talking about how I feel, this was extremely hard for me. But I decided that it was necessary and would be worth it in order to get treatment to get better. To be dismissed like this and to be told in a ‘You’re the kid, I’m the person with the psychology degree and phD’ way ‘ you don’t have schizophrenia, delusional disorder etc and you’re not going crazy’ was just kicking me down when I opened up and was vulnerable.

    His response would have been perfectly appropriate if say someone had just had a bad few days and just woke up in the morning and decided to see a psychologist because they thought they were going crazy. BUT for me this has been 1. going on for months, 2. I actually took the trouble to write it all down and think about it and 3. Typed it up so its hardly like I rushed in to his office on the spur of the moment because I thought I was going crazy!

    Even as a non-medical person, if someone told me they believed that there were hidden cameras everywhere watching them and you thought people were following you around, I wouldn’t tell them ah sure don’t worry about it. I would tell them to seek help so they don’t believe these things and wont be distressed and worried about them. So it baffles me that a medical ‘professional’ didn’t give me a similar response

    Its only in the last two weeks that ive realised that its not normal, that’s it’s affecting my life and relationships and that I need help. So to have him turn around and dismiss it as not being such a problem has got me so confused again. I put my confidence and trust in this guy and he just threw it back in my face.

    Its getting worse and worse, in the last few weeks I’ve sometimes (for very brief periods…seconds) been confused as who my parents were when talking to them and have trouble reading as the words just don’t mean anything to me sometimes.

    I live my life in isolation and could go days without speaking to a single person. This is someone who loved being around people and meeting new people and hanging out in bars. I just cant picture myself holding down a job (right now I live on loans and some financial support from my parents)


    He basically told me that everyone had fantasies (which I agree with) and its only when u act out these fantasies delluisions that you have a problem.
    Well, I feel that I’m getting progressively worse and feel that its only a matter of time that this will happen. What is perhaps the most alarming thing that has happened is that after an extremely stressful day, something just flipped in my mind, it was a strange experience like being high on drugs and drunk at the same time. I got into my mind that the landlord in our flat had installed hidden cameras and was using them to spy on us. I bought into it so much that I rushed off back to the flat to warn my flatmates (1 hr away). Thankfully when I got there was no one home, but I know that if they were I would have let rip with what was on my mind.
    Its these experiences that really freak me out and think that I need treatment now to nip the problem in the bud.
    I mean, what is wrong with this guy, do I need to be rolling around on the floor and drooling and speaking nonsense for him to take me seriously??

    My current state of mind is that I hope I will flip out so much and be admitted to hospital so I can get the help I need. Surely this is an example of being failed by a medical system, I mean, can he not see a derailment just waiting to happen? And shouldn’t the problem be treated as early as possible??! I wrote this down on the sheets that I gave him and it baffles me that alarm bells didn’t start ringing in his head.


    Having said this he did refer me to a psychiatrist at the same establishment ‘to be given something to relieve the anxiety because the psychiatrist knows more about that kind of thing than the doctors’.
    He seems to be on a first name basis with the psychiatrist, so I don’t know what the psychiatrist’s response will be, will he take it seriously or just dismiss it like the psychologist did?? I just don’t know…


    There is also another dimension to this situation. A few years ago I had a minor and very mild condition and found out from the internet that a medication used to treat schizophrenia alleviated it from up to 90%. However, at the time it didn’t have a big effect on my life at all so I didn’t look into it further. However since the traumatic event this condition had worsened greatly so much so that it is half of my overall problem. So in the back of my mind I’m thinking ‘Am I exaggerating my schizophrenia symptoms so I can be diagnosed with it and used to treat the 2 problems?’ or sometimes even ‘ Am I imagining all my experiences?’. However, when I come around after my different experiences I’m like ‘wow I really need help’ and even have considered ringing 999 or going into the A&E.
    When I found symptom descriptions of schizophrenia on the web and realized that that was what I was experience in a nutshell of course I was shocked but have now come around to that possibility. Of course I don’t want to have the burden of being diagnosed schizophrenic hanging over me for my life and the stigma attached to that, but, at the same time I need to have some definite diagnosis so I can accept the problem and hopefully get on with my life.



    I’m just so angry and on the verge of tears at the moment….

    I welcome your thoughts, comments and any similar experiences you may have had…


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 20,346 ✭✭✭✭KdjaCL


    You need another doctor, tell your GP or who everreferred you to this gimp that hes a gimp. Nothing to dow ith you but hes a muppet possibly got his degreee with 8 tokens from a breakfast cereal.

    I dont think drugs can sure an illness of the mind only alleviate it or push it away till sleep time. Maybe your paranoia comes from your owd job? Either way get a new doctor.



    kdjac


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8 user11035


    I really feel for you Pepsi. What you are going through sounds like a living nightmare. Listen, youve broken that negative cycle - you took a positive step when you went to see somebody for help. For that, you have to be so proud of yourself.
    Its just such a pity you ended up with that monkey boy excuse for a psychologist. You should dump this eejit at once before he damages your nerves anymore. I mean, it is difficult to find a good therapist, not everyone are suited to each other you know?
    I know how frustrated and upset you are feeling aswell. Your faith in people gets a bit of a knocking after the experience youve just had. I suffer from anxiety and depression myself. Like you, I had enough one day and decided to face my fears and ask for help. However I only got as far as a doctor who like the person above said, must have earned his qualifications off a box of cornflakes. This doctor sat there and shouted at me for around ten minutes. Hence, sending me into another panic attack. There are some so called 'professionals' out there that should never be allowed outside their front door, nevermind be trusted with someones deep emotional problems.

    On a positive note, at least you have recognition of what is happening to you. You just need to find a therapist who will actually help you and not make you feel like a 2 yr old with wet pants. If you like, pm me and I will give you the contact details of a really good therapist.

    So dont give up ok..you cant let whoever you have seen knock you back for another couple of years until you get worse.
    I really hope you find peace within yourself soon. Have the strength to pick yourself up and start again with another therapist.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,199 ✭✭✭Jimi-Spandex


    I've decided to be brutally honest. I apologise if anything I say causes offence, this is not my intention. Just to put things in frame I have a friend who has suffered from paranoid schizophrenia so I have some experience with people who suffer from this.


    I wouldn't dismiss the psychologist so fast. He knows mental health alot better than you or me, and just what causes these problems. Just because you disagree with him does not make him wrong.

    It's almost like you are just looking for validation from him, you just want someone to tell you that you are mentally ill, as if it is some easy escape route or just something tangible to point at and say "THIS is what's wrong with me". What I'm getting at is that you seem to be unwilling to explore other avenues i.e. the childhood thing. It may take a while to work through it, I would suggest going back to him with an open mind, you appear too dismissive of what he has to say. It's like you have a chip on your shoulder about him or the profession.

    However if you are really unhappy with him, go back to your GP and ask for another psychologist.

    I would try to work this out without meds, the meds typically used in these cases are exceptionally strong, akin to using a sword to clean your ears. They might ease the problem but they will frequently create others.

    I'd stay away from online "diagnosis" sites. They will only fuel this conviction that you have that you are mentally ill. They will not help you.

    And finally, good luck.


  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,655 Mod ✭✭✭✭Faith


    Dude... how long did it take you to write all that?!

    Anyway, I'd be inclined to agree with Jimi-Spandex here. A lot of people think psychologists can just "fix" them but the truth is, there's a lot of work involved from both parties. None the less, it may help you feel better if you look for another psychologist. There's nothing tying you to this current one.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,807 ✭✭✭chump


    A psychologist is only a person, there are numerous crap doctors, mechanics, dentists, teachers... you just got a crap psychologist... shop around


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,910 ✭✭✭✭RoundyMooney


    In short, don't dismiss his diagnosis, but don't blithely accept it either.

    Two words, second opinion. It may be a bit of a pain to start from scratch again with a new psychologist, but give it a go. You are well within your rights to.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 25,848 ✭✭✭✭Zombrex


    TBH it sounds like you want the doctor to give you a quick answer, tell you exactly whats is wrong and how to fix it. Unfortunately it doesn't work like that. I know people who have been seeing councilors for years and are still working through their issues. But you still have to do it, it just takes time and a lot of hard work.

    I would also avoid diagnosing yourself. Convincing yourself that you have such and such mental disorder might make yourself feel better , that you have some control over what is happening to you, but really you are not qualified to diagnose yourself, even if you had MD in psychology. A diagnosis requires an detachment that is impossible to do properly if you are doing it on yourself.

    But saying that if you are not happy with this particular person, just go see someone else. Maybe go back to your GP and ask to be referred to someone else. Getting help is good, but this guy might just be a not that good psychologist


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 19,986 ✭✭✭✭mikemac


    I'm ready to be flamed here but have you tried any motivantional material?
    Tony Robbins? Steven Convey? Tom Venuto?

    Found them very helpful.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,621 ✭✭✭GreenHell


    Look man, if your not comfortable then change but like the people above say you gota respect the fact that these people know what their talking about, but its your euro if your not comfortable then walk.


  • Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    hey, i'd say your best bet is to ask your gp to prescribe anti-depressants, and to refer you to another psychologist. the anti-d's will, for want of a better word, numb your experiences, and make things a whole lot more bareable, you might have to try 3 or 4 different brands, for about a month each, till you find the right one, or you might get one that suits you first time, whatever you do, if you find that their working, and you are starting to feel better, dont stop taking them. i was kinda on and off them for a year, before things got really bad, and i was prescribed something that just didnt agree with me, but by this stage i was so desperate that i kept taking them, believing that id feel better in just another week, just another week... but i found a brand that helped, it took about 3 months on them till i felt allright, still on them, but thats cos im still waiting for an appointment with a psychologist, got to see a psychiatrist, but he just saw me for five seconds every month, "How are you today?" "ok" "heres a prescription" "ok", and that was it.
    at the start, and all through, my mother was worried about me, she was looking up things on the internet, trying to findout what was wrong with me, and she came up with aspergers syndrome, its a mild form of autism. i was looking at all the checklists "two from this list AND three from this list AND either A OR B,," and i was thinking, yeah, this is me allright, but i mentioned it to my docter and he didnt seem to agree, and another doctor gave me a sheet, told me to tick the boxes, and said i was more anxious than depressed, i dont have a clue, but be carefull about self diagnosing

    oh, and if you go on anti-d's, dont drink too much, they dont mix well, and if your smoking da hasheesh, give it up.
    best of luck


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,082 ✭✭✭lostexpectation


    it sounds like a bit of both, perhaps you mentioned schizophrenia a bit too much, or too early, online diagnosis can't be trusted but occassionally they may be right, especially with bad experiences you describe, I'd go to a different person...

    the your just young thing can be incredibly annoying, the guys not crazy for looking for a fix, its a perfectly logical thing to do, he just needs to slow down and find someone he trusts to help him out...


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,239 ✭✭✭Elessar


    Sounds to me like you're just looking for a sense of importance in your life that you can't get anywhere else. The constant isolation you mentioned has probably shifted your focus to get some attention elsewhere, like a doctor, for thoughts in your head that crop up because of your isolation. Yet when you went to him, he told you exactly what you didn't want to hear, and so YOU dismissed him. He is a medical professional for a reason.

    But if you are really worried, I suggest finding another one and making an appointment there.

    Remember, there are no thoughts in your head that are there without your permission.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,735 ✭✭✭ST*


    the anti-d's will, for want of a better word, numb your experiences

    Anti-depressants do not numb experiences. With depression there is a reduced amount of serotonin in the brain. Anti-depressants are designed to replace serotonin and enhance mood, as opposed to blocking experiences.

    I dont think its in the OP's best interests to be receiving any kind of medical advice from members of boards - even with the best of intentions.


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,774 ✭✭✭antoinolachtnai


    I don't know anything much about you (and I don't pay much attention to fragrance ads) so I can't say anything specific. Also, there is no way you can get advice for your situation in a forum like this. This is a very serious situation, as I think you are aware. You need the help of professionals and friends.

    First thing I think you need to do is ask your friends and relatives, particularly your parents to support you. You don't need to go into all the gorey details with all of them. Just make sure they know that you are sick and that you need support.

    Second thing is to go back to your GP. Do it as soon as you can. Bring a friend for support if you think it might help.

    A few general remarks:

    Loads of peopl think they are perfectly sane and that their professional carers have it in for them and want to make them look crazy. You have the opposite problem.

    It is true that the boundary between sanity and insanity is a very fuzzy line. There is a big literature about this. (For example, see http://members.aol.com/ahunter3/psych_inmates_libfront/vol_2/Rosenhan/rosenhan.html Don't blame the guy too much because he couldn't tell the difference.

    I would point out one thing that you have that you are lucky to have and that a lot of other people do not have: insight. You have insight into your situation. You are aware of your own situation and your own pain.

    Please be careful not to put yourself in a situation where you 'flip' and get admitted to hospital. The experience of being admitted to a psychiatric hospital is one you should try to avoid if you can. That's not to say that there aren't some very good psychiatric hospitals. There are. It's just that hospitalization is always a drastic, last-resort measure.

    Anyway, get yourself the help you need from your friends and from your GP. Do it now.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,251 ✭✭✭AngryBadger


    I think you should go back to that therapist.

    It sounds to me like he's trying to get you to take a different perspective on your life, since your' current perspective seems to be the root of your problems.

    Yous post sees to be mostly ranting about this therapist and what a gimp he is. i think you went to him half expecting validation for the prblems you feel you have, which we all want and which is perfectly normal. After a while you decided to open up a little more, and when you didn't get the response you wanted you bolted.

    A psychologist can't reach into your brain and fix your problems, all they can do is try to highlight what they feel may be the root of your problems, give you a forum to air your feelings, and try to offer other ways to think about your situation, in the hope that you can come to terms with your feelings yourself in time.

    It sounds like that's what he was trying to do, but it wasn't the response you felt you wanted/deserved, you felt insulted that you would come so far as to tell him everything only to have him, in your view, dismiss it out of hand. But I don't believe that's what he was doing.

    I think you should go back to this psychologist, and try harder to understand what he's saying to you.

    I don't mean to undermine your feelings in any way, but this is my impression from a long post which seems to largely consist of you being angry with someone who didn't respond the way you wanted them to.


  • Registered Users Posts: 7,134 ✭✭✭Lux23


    Go and get yourself another doctor, they will not make you feel better if you don't like them.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,735 ✭✭✭ST*


    Badger I can see where you are coming from with this one - but I think you are on the wrong track here.

    We choose our own doctors, dentists, even hairdressers and go back to them because we know, trust and rely on them. It should be no different with a psychologist.

    While it is true that you might not like everything that a psychologist is going to say to you, you have got to be comfortable enough with him/her. you are giving out private and personal information them. Psychologists will provoke you to understand yourself with their questions. If in fact this mans psychologist was dismissive towards him with regard to age - that is unprofessional.

    If it were me, as Roundy said - I'd go for a second opinion.

    Pepsi, we havent heard from you since you posted the thread, hope you are keeping well.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,251 ✭✭✭AngryBadger


    Not disagreeing that a second opinion may be in order. But the posting sounds a bit hypochondriac. Almost as if the OP wants to be diagnosed as being a skitzophrenic.

    By all means get a second opinion, but if that opinion is similar to the first, then maybe you need to revise how you're taking what's being said to you.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 125 ✭✭pepsi1234


    First of all thank you for all the replies.
    Secondly I have calmed down alot since I wrote that post and some of the things I said were said in haste.
    However, having said this I still stand by my view that the psychologist is incompetent.
    Listen, youve broken that negative cycle - you took a positive step when you went to see somebody for help. For that, you have to be so proud of yourself.
    Hey thanks for that. I am proud of myself for the taking the first step and thought that it would be half the problem solved, but not quite how i thought it would be. But hey, I'm on the way there anyway.
    Hearing so many ads for depression from Aware etc urging people to seek help you would think that medical professionals would congratulate people for taking the hardest step of looking for help. I know they deal with these kind of people everyday and so it seems normal to them but to have depression, anxiety problems, you tend to feel isolated and alone. So, having someone say that in person from them would feel great and mean so much instead of getting a 'here we go again' vibe.
    This doctor sat there and shouted at me for around ten minutes.
    These kind of people really shouldnt be working in contact with people especially not in the medical field with people seeking help.
    It's almost like you are just looking for validation from him, you just want someone to tell you that you are mentally ill, as if it is some easy escape route or just something tangible to point at and say "THIS is what's wrong with me".
    Thanks for your food for thought. That is exactly what I was looking for, a label to know what I was experiencing.
    You see, I haven't told any of my family yet. I would like to tell some but it would be unfair to tell some and not others and to expect them to keep it secret from the others. Another thing is that I'm a private and secretive person and do not like talking about my feelings. I do try but its still hard.
    So what I was hoping for was to be told, 'you have X and this is how we plan to treat you' . I envisaged I would start the treatment and then tell my family I have X, I'm getting treated for it and I'm getting better.
    What I didnt want to do is start telling them, 'well I'm anxious, I exprience this and this and this'. For the reason that I didnt want to worry them and also not for them to expect me to give them an update everytime I go to the doctor or psychologist, as by nature I'm a private person.
    Yet when you went to him, he told you exactly what you didn't want to hear, and so YOU dismissed him.

    I did dismiss him, for the following reasons:
    1. On our first meeting about 20 mins in his mobile rang. He answered it. I'm an easy going person so it didnt bother me too much. I thought maybe it was in connection with a referall or with some other patient.But from what I gathered from the conversation it was to do with a part he was ordering for his computer. But then what got under my skin was that half way during the 2 min conversation he spun right around in his swivel chair and turned his back to me!
    2. As if not knowing basic manners was bad enough in addition to this he was not aware of how he was coming accross and how what he said could be perceived. I would of thought a psychologist of all people would be aware of this. For eg, I told him that when I was young my father moved away for two years for work purposes. He asked me how I felt at the time and I told him that it didnt have a great effect on me and that I just moved on. He then quickly snapped back with ' I don't believe for one second that it didnt have an effect on you'. It was almost like he invalidated my feelings. I know what he meant 'That maybe consciously it didnt have any effect but maybe unconsciously it did'. But there are more appropiate ways of getting a message accross.
    3. One thing I thought was highly irrelevant and inappropiate was that he insinuated (sp?) that my parents had in fact seperated during that time! Then later on during the session he was like 'from how you describe your mother, your father must find it hard to live with her'. So now as if I don't have enough to worry about I'm worrying about the state of my parents marriage! . And when you look for signs to confirm your belief in something you can skew things and this is even more true for a marriage since no marriage is hunky dory.
    4. At the end of the last session :When I was leaving and he was giving instructions to the receptionist to refer me to the councellors, he then said his goodbyes and I actually had to remind him to refer me to the psychiatrist. Thats how seriously I think he took my situation.
    5. I can go on and on. But small things would really make me question his therapy skills, like at the start of each session he would ask when we met last,and at the start of each session he would look at my file and go 'Oh yeah you're the guy who did X, y, z and feels X, y z. Impersonal or what?
    I thought I'd go crazy if he asked me one more time what my surname was and how to spell it!!

    What I'm saying is that his BASIC skills in giving therapy like creating a doctor-patient connection and atmosphere of openness were non-existant.
    You're probably thinking, why didnt you just tell him where to stuff it? The reason being is that my college paid for the vast majority of the fee so I might as well have been getting it for free.

    * I forgot to mention something in my original post. He told me he didnt like to label problems. I agree with that. The amount of young children being diagnosed with ADHD and being drugged up at such a young age is a disgrace. Labels shouldnt be thrown around so readily by doctors etc. or else sure, half of the population would be walking around with Social Phobia for wanting to stay in on a Saturday night.
    However, my problem is that I think my condition does warrant a label. However when he did say that I didnt have 'schizophrenia, delusional disorder etc and that I wasnt going crazy' he did then say that I had *mild* PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder). I just took it for granted that I had it. Another problem I have is that it is anything BUT mild. The way he said it, he mubbled it and said it as he was standing up and not even looking me in the eye. It was almost as if he was afraid of labelling what I had and that by being definite about it, it would suddenly become and big problem and swallow me up.
    From what I read on the many PTSD websites, my condition is chronic PTSD as it defines it as symptoms being present for over 1 month (in my case 6 months) and that symptoms of loss of touch with reality and eating disorders may also be present , which is true in my case.
    I have posted the print out I gave the psychologist on a psychiatrist forum board just to see what they have to say. Although I havent got a response from a psychiatrist I, the general opinion is that my problem is PTSD. So my problem seems to be chronic PTSD and not schizophrenia thankfully.
    I just hope that the psychiatrist I will go to see in 3 wks time will take the problem more seriously than the psychologist.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,269 ✭✭✭cathy01


    what part of ireland are you in.Lable are just that , they ae not cures.
    I think you need to see someone else.If a dcotor turned his back on me or even answered his phone I would remind him of who is paying his wage and why.Your time is as valueable as his.
    HTH,
    Cathy


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  • Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    maybe since yr job ended, and u're keeping to yourself so much you're looking for attention? like u want a reason to be considered unique/interesting/eccentric and ur trying to achieve that through mental illness?

    i know myself i had really paranoid thoughts and ideas about things during times when things weren't going to well (sudden death of family and friends in short amount of time), but i didnt want anyone to know really, and if i told any one it was just to get sympathy. i noticed this happening a lot around the same time with some of my friends who were seeing psychiatrists, who'd be self harming and talking about how they'd hullusinate and all, like it was an achievment to be seen as crazy.

    i dunno if it is like this for you, and if it is you probably wont want to believe it. but if u think it might be, then maybe instead of seeing the doctor u should be doing things like getting more hobbies, making new friends, getting out more, doing creative work (music, art etc). things that will make u stand out and feel important for something more substantial/rewarding than your looks or mental illness

    just a suggestion


  • Registered Users Posts: 17,371 ✭✭✭✭Zillah


    After reading over all of this one thing stands out for me:

    This doctor seems to have upset you greatly. If it was simply a case of him being incompetant surely you should simply decide that he's crap and find another one?

    But that wasn't what happened. You came here and listed what happened, almost as if you want supoort in dismissing him. From what you've said it seems that despite his failings, this psychologist has made you look at things in a way you're not comfortable with. You're lashing out and now you feel the need to justify it.

    I'd suggest you really think over what he said and why it upset you so much. Don't be afraid to admit he might be right about things.
    (A lot of you would probably recognise me from a TV ad I did a few years back for a fragrance.)

    Any pictures? ;)


  • Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    'well, i'm with pepsi here. if a doc/therapist makes you feel like they're not taking you seriously, then they cannot be of any help. practically speaking.'


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 47,223 CMod ✭✭✭✭Black Swan


    pepsi1234 wrote:
    Just a bit of background; I’m a 23 yr old male. I am currently enrolled in a night college course after giving up modelling (in order to have a less pretentious job!) having modelled all over Europe and the US . (A lot of you would probably recognise me from a TV ad I did a few years back for a fragrance.)
    I used to fashion model and now act. I'm getting a completely different read on you. Your statement "to have a less pretentious job" just doesn't sound right for some reason. Did something happen or not happen on your last shoot? Did something happen with your agent? Did he/she fail to deliver, offer something below your expectations, ask you to do something you did not want to do, drop you, or what?

    When I am not acting, I am acting out. Reading your post, it sounded to me like you are acting out. Instead of a new shrink, perhaps you need a new agent?


  • Moderators, Motoring & Transport Moderators Posts: 24,924 Mod ✭✭✭✭BuffyBot


    To be honest, I have to side with the others here who feel that you're jumping on him a little too much because you're not getting the answers you want.

    However, we'll never know the complete truth because none of us are present at those sessions. I'm sure you're psychologist would have an entirely different viewpoint on this, somehow.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,045 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    Quit dragging up old threads.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,479 ✭✭✭Kell


    digging wrote:
    'well, i'm with pepsi here. if a doc/therapist makes you feel like they're not taking you seriously, then they cannot be of any help. practically speaking.'

    Seconded. The therapist sounds like he has a serious lack of professional and píss poor bedside manner. To dismiss someone with a sentence such as "I dont believe you" is, in some regards, negligent. What if the OP was bordering suicidal without disclosing this to the therapist and such a dismissal of feeling was the straw that broke the camels back?

    To me, it sounds like the therapist has done fúck all exercise in trying to assess "how" to approach his client. Its one thing saying the OP isnt hearing the answers he wants and therefore blames the therapist. What about the therapist taking the time to find out how to deliver what he wants to say to his client in a fashion that is palatable to the OP? Its extremely bad form to deilver off the cuff statements without regard for the clients state of mind and expect them to swallow it.

    Words, statements and intention mean different things to different people. Its the responsibility of the therapist to ensure that what and how he says things to people will be received beneficially and ensure the client does not react negatively. A therapist is a catalyst for self help- its the patient that does the work in the end, but theres no point in sticking a spanner in a hole that was clearly designed for a screw.

    K-


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