Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Alcohol on first dates

  • 12-01-2006 6:47pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I was wondering what peoples opinions are on taking a girl out for a drink on the first few dates. The last couple of girls Ive been out with Ive taken them for drinks in pubs and bars, It helped with any akwardness that there may have been, and generally most of the nights were really good at the time, in the long run Im not so sure, as there is a come down after this and doubts start coming into your head and the next time you meet them you’re a little unsure of how to act as the last time you met you were all over eachother and your not sure If the other person was really into you or was it jus the alcohol.

    I was thinking the best thing to do was to take a girl out for just one or two drinks on the first date just to loosen up a bit but not get tipsy or drunk, and then on the next date to do something that does not involve alcohol at all. Do you reckon this is a good strategy or should you take them out on the first date to somewehere were no alcohol is involved and the next time (If there is a next time) to take them to a pub/bar.

    Do you reckon you should just not go near alcohol for the first few times and see If your comfortable with eachother, the problem is for me personally im very shy and fairly not confident and not good in public places and need the drink to get over this. Any advise would be welcomed.


Comments

  • Hosted Moderators Posts: 7,486 ✭✭✭Red Alert


    bring her ice skating or bowling or something for a second date. useful to go for dates at different times of the day too.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,347 ✭✭✭daiixi


    I agree that going for a couple of drinks helps break the ice but maybe try not to get trashed!! Good ideas from Red Alert for the second date.. You can go for coffee, lunch, a movie...


  • Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 10,446 Mod ✭✭✭✭xzanti


    Yes Id have to agree that alcohol definately gives people a false sense of security and can trick you into thinking that you are getting on great with your date when in reality you may be incompatible.... So yes a non alcoholic first date is probably best.. IF you are dating with a view to a relationship that is...

    HOWEVER if its a case where both parties are simply looking for a good time then IMO the pub is always a good place to start (once both parties are aware of the arrangement of course) IMHO


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 10,440 Mod ✭✭✭✭Mr Magnolia


    Took my GF to the cinema on our first date, went to the pub afterwards and the two of us got fairly oily and had great crack, married her 7yrs later.

    I wouldn't get to hung up on it, if ye're meant to be together it won't really matter. Your not going to decide to marry her after 1 good date.

    Hope you understand what I'm getting at.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,099 ✭✭✭✭WhiteWashMan


    always arrange the second date before you end the first one.

    it helps get rid of any awkwardness.

    just say you ve had a really great time, and youd like to meet up again. nail the time and date, id suggest something easy like the cinema. no brain power required, and it means that you have a second date!

    so when you leave each other you both have something to look forward to. if she phones up and says that something has come up, then try and get the time and date again, if she wont commit, then go out with someone else.

    these hints and tips have been brought to you by wwman, who had a very succesfull love life when he was single :)


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,029 ✭✭✭um7y1h83ge06nx


    I think the pub is a good idea if ye only have literally one or two.

    The problem with the cinema etc. is that it is hard to get to know someone, i mean you'll be spending almost 2 hours in the cinema not chatting.
    If you find a quiet pub and have just one or two slow drinks, you'll be able to get to know each other much better. Of course if the beer is flowing freely it's a disaster!

    Personally I tend to go for the pub and restrict myself to two.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 128 ✭✭smurfbaby


    I think that going for dinner would be the best option. You can still have a few drinks to relax, but you wont feel as uptight as you might sitting in the pub. If conversation runs out, you can discuss what you want to order off the menu etc. If all goes well you can always go for a couple of drinks after. At this stage your stomachs will be well lined anyway so there's no chances of getting horribly drunk!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 78,580 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    The problem with the cinema etc. is that it is hard to get to know someone, i mean you'll be spending almost 2 hours in the cinema not chatting.
    Thats two hours with them, without needing to "perform". Meet for a drink before the movie (theres a bar in Cineworld / UGC) and if you have time have a drink / coffee after.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 121 ✭✭LORDOFDOOM


    Dude, take her for one or two drinks MAX. And don't drink fast either. No self respecting girl wants to go out with a guy who lashes 6 pints into himself on the first date!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 387 ✭✭fischerspooner


    I always bring girls to pubs on dates, and drink a rake of pints. I couldn't handle it sober, I find it hard to talk much in those situations unless I have the help of drink. But it's never caused any problems, always been successful.


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,551 ✭✭✭panda100


    I like going to the pub on the first date cos you can get to know someone and relax a bit.But the second date should have no alcohol involvment like going to the cinema so you can get to know each other without the black stuff.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 698 ✭✭✭nitrogen


    George Costanza in Seinfeld used to always make sure he had date #2/3 before it ended. Sometimes leaving something at her house or what ever. Very funny.

    My 2 cents would be avoid movies for the first date (Although I like that concept, 2 hours in which you don't have to perform,lol), talking is the key thing here. I see no problem with the pub but ONLY 1 or 2 for a first date.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,885 ✭✭✭Stabshauptmann



    these hints and tips have been brought to you by wwman, who had a very succesfull love life when he was single :)

    But that was a long long time ago :p

    Other advice from WWM is never text and bring a girl flowers and chocolates:rolleyes:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 241 ✭✭leftofcentre


    Sometimes i think if it wasn't for alcohol the irish race would have died out years ago ;)

    Its a question of balance:
    A few drinks = relaxed happy mood
    Too many drinks = asleep in the corner

    To much drink if one of the main mistakes people make when they are out on the pull, girls hate drunk guys hitting on them, and drunk women are just embrassing.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,099 ✭✭✭✭WhiteWashMan


    But that was a long long time ago :p

    Other advice from WWM is never text and bring a girl flowers and chocolates:rolleyes:


    i will certainly accept that if you can find it and quote it with regards to the chocolates.

    i see no reason why you would text someone. after all, if youare trying to build a relationship, you should talk.

    only people who are in that position who text are afraid of being rejected. its the old, if i phone her, she may actually tell me shes not interested, so if i jhust text her, we can pretend shes interested....


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 121 ✭✭LORDOFDOOM


    That's not true. If she's not interested then she's not interested, a phone call/text won't change that. Unless you're the typical ugly boards user, in which case she probably isn't interested to begin with. Unless she's a moon pig of course :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,885 ✭✭✭Stabshauptmann


    Twas only meant in jest WWM

    But I could have sworn I read you giving advice in one of those "I like this girl, what do I do" threads where you said bring her flowers.
    But the search says no, so obviously Im wrong.

    But the txt'n thing I think you're out of date. Its fun to just send one or two lines and it can be a fun way to get to know someone or keep things interesting between dates. Obviously you wont build a relationship by txtn but it has its uses. But I am going OT


Advertisement