Undressing

LegacyUser

Ok, this may sound like a stupid question. I've been going out with a girl now for almost a year. Everything is great. The one thing that is bugging me though is the fact that she still does not undress in front of me (try writing that without trying to sound like a perv). Anyway what I mean is that she will go into the bathroom or whatever to do stuff like this. I totally resepect the girl's need for privacy or whatever, but it makes me feel very distant etc, when it is happening all the time... Maybe this sounds weird. I feel that she is concious of her body which I happen to think is awesome!, but it gets to me sometimes that she cant seem to relax around me...
Am I being irrational with these thoughts...??

Canis Lupus

Did you see that comedy sketch over christmas by the american guy on how Irish girls can somehow get undressed infront of you and never show you any skin. I thought it was hilarious.

Anyway you're not being irrational but you need to talk to your girlfriend. We can't make her take her clothes off infront of you.

bp

a lot of girls are like that and as far as i know there is no girl who is totally happy with her body/ self! ....give her time, tell her she is beautiful (not sexy or words like that, say beautiful, it is more meaningful,i think so anyway)........girls like to hear that!

*Shelly*

She seems to be very insecure about her body. After a year she should be comfortable enough to undress in front of you. If she's insecure about her body there's nothing you can say that will change her mind but what you can do is try to make sure she knows that you love her body even if she doesn't. Hope it helps

Dave

I don't understand? Does she then return from the bathroom naked or what? Are you in a sexual relationship? Is it just the undressing in front of you that she has trouble with or is it being around you naked?

Chrissy

Constantly remind her that you do think her body's awesome & that doesn't have to be in a pervy way either, nor does it have to be just when you're getting some.

Just let her know she's incredible in your eyes.

How would she feel with you helping her undress in the heat of the moment?

Actually, Dave has some good questions there...

440Hz

This same topic was on Ray D'Arcy yesterday and loads of girls texted in to say they were exactly the same way with their boyfriends. Tbh I think a really high percentage of girls would admit to this. But as a previous poster said, all you can do is talk to her about it really. Just tell her how great you think she looks and that you understand that she may not be happy enough with her own body to undress in front of you yada yada yada... just be supportive and she *probably* will come around to it in her own good time. Either way, its totally normal.

Stabshauptmann

Totally normal, for Irish girls.
Its rediculous and annoying but very ****ing common.

LegacyUser

Don't worry about it, it's women, and some may say it's more prevalent in Ireland.

If she doesnt have confidence in herself then beyond complementing her and making her feel better about herself, there's not a lot you can do.

As Dave asked, are you in a sexual relationship with her? Are you intimate with each other? Is she one of these women that needs total darkenss to be undressed?

LegacyUser

Yes I am in a sexual relationship with her, which adds to the fact I dont understand it - of course I have seen her naked... but on a day-to-day basis she reverts to the hide the body method!

mccarrd2

The quick answer is women are weird, Ive seen my girlfirend naked hundreds of times and sometimes she pulls the same stunt. I wouldnt worry about it. At the same time its nice to see them get undressed in front of you.

panda100

Canis Lupus wrote:

Did you see that comedy sketch over christmas by the american guy on how Irish girls can somehow get undressed infront of you and never show you any skin. I thought it was hilarious.

Anyway you're not being irrational but you need to talk to your girlfriend. We can't make her take her clothes off infront of you.

Yep des bishop got this one right!ah dont worry thats Irish girls for you.Chrissy is right just keep telling her how amazing you think her body is etc

Do you not see her naked at all ?? even when in the sack ???
tell her you want to have sex with no covers on as they get in the way
(which they always do) or even with the lights on and ALSO reassure her about her body

panda100

panda100 wrote:

Yep des bishop got this one right!ah dont worry thats Irish girls for you.Chrissy is right just keep telling her how amazing you think her body is etc

Yeah i seen him in vicar street V funny
I'd have his babies

Canis Lupus

panda100 wrote:

Yep des bishop got this one right!ah dont worry thats Irish girls for you.Chrissy is right just keep telling her how amazing you think her body is etc

That's the fella. Thought I'd choke watching it. Irish girls are strange animals.

LovelyHurling

Is it just me or does everybody else not just take their clothes off during the sex? Ive never had a formal "take your clothes off" experience, its always just happened rather horizontally in the course of the event to be honest. Then again, doing it another way isnt anything to worry about, could just be her way.

simu

Odd. Maybe she has really horrible underwear or sth! Or else she's insecure - annoying but not really enough to go have therapy over! Guess you'll just have to put up with it!

@people who said a lot of Irish girls are like this: why would that be so? I mean, it's not like how to undress in front of a guy is something that's passed down from mother to daughter! You'd think everyone would develop their own technique!

LegacyUser

Maybe she doesn't want to be naked in front of that often in case you get bored of her.

hullaballoo

According to this email I got on bebo there today, it burns 187 calories if you undress someone without their consent. Just a thought.

Victor

Maybe its modesty gone mad, but maybe she wants to do womany things like remove tampon / pad, check for smells, etc.

How about you take her to a beach sometime and see how she undresses there?

hullaballoo wrote:

According to this email I got on bebo there today, it burns 187 calories if you undress someone without their consent. Just a thought.

Behave!

misswex

I understand that it would take a while to get comfortable with someone but I would have thought that after a YEAR she would have been comfortable enough to undress in front of you!!!

She's obviously just insecure about her body, all women are but I would say that if you keep reassuring her that she will eventually undress in front of you.

simu

shy_girl wrote:

Maybe she doesn't want to be naked in front of that often in case you get bored of her.

As if!

maybe she wants to do womany things like remove tampon / pad, check for smells, etc.

Would not be an issue every day.

Sounds like she is just insecure.

Seraphina

this is a common thing with irish girls???

dont get it myself tbh... all sounds very old fashioned and weird to me. i mean how does that work? you obviously see her naked, why will she not undress in front of you? do she go to the bathroom and do it?
the only suggestion that seems to make sense to me is the ugly underwear one, i cant for the life of me fathom the reasoning behind this!!

JustCoz

She's probably just a bit insecure and I think a lot of girls can relate with that. Maybe she just wants to get changed without feeling like someone's checking her out. There probably isn't much you can say to give her more confidence, it'll have to come from her.

How old is she and are you her first boyfriend?