Can someone tell me where I can find....

Numina

A Satanist Bible, I'm not actually Satanist or anything, i'm just really interested in reading the thing, and I want one for my birthday.

Nevyn

I am really rather puzzled why you are asking here as Pagans are not Satanists.
I would suggest like any book you either look on line or get the details of the publishers and go into easons or waterstones and ask if they can order it in for you.

hairyheretic

www.amazon.co.uk would probably be a good place to look.

Numina

I'm asking here because I wasn't sure where to ask a friend suggested asking here. and thanks for the help so far

Sapien

Numina wrote:

I'm asking here because I wasn't sure where to ask a friend suggested asking here. and thanks for the help so far

Waterstones and Hodges Figgis both stock La Vey's "The Satanic Bible".

NeilJ

Isn't there a difference between the La Vey brand of satanism and the typical idea people get when they mention satanism? I thought they were different beliefs, not that I know much about either

Neil

Talliesin

NeilJ wrote:

Isn't there a difference between the La Vey brand of satanism and the typical idea people get when they mention satanism?

Quite a lot. For a start the general baby and/or virgin sacrifice thing in the common conception doesn't tend to go down to well with law-enforcement in reality, so La Vey couldn't really do too much of that.

La Vey's philosophy is essentially one of materialism and individualism, and does not believe in a literal Satan. It can be somewhat summarised by quoting the Nine Satanic Statements:

1. Satan represents indulgence instead of abstinence!
2. Satan represents vital existence instead of spiritual pipe dreams!
3. Satan represents undefiled wisdom instead of hypocritical self-deceit!
4. Satan represents kindness to those who deserve it instead of love wasted on ingrates!
5. Satan represents vengeance instead of turning the other cheek!
6. Satan represents responsibility to the responsible instead of concern for psychic vampires!
7. Satan represents man as just another animal, sometimes better, more often worse than those that walk on all-fours, who, because of his “divine spiritual and intellectual development,” has become the most vicious animal of all!
8. Satan represents all of the so-called sins, as they all lead to physical, mental, or emotional gratification!
9. Satan has been the best friend the Church has ever had, as He has kept it in business all these years!

The The Eleven Satanic Rules of the Earth:

1. Do not give opinions or advice unless you are asked.
2. Do not tell your troubles to others unless you are sure they want to hear them.
3. When in another’s lair, show him respect or else do not go there.
4. If a guest in your lair annoys you, treat him cruelly and without mercy.
5. Do not make sexual advances unless you are given the mating signal.
6. Do not take that which does not belong to you unless it is a burden to the other person and he cries out to be relieved.
7. Acknowledge the power of magic if you have employed it successfully to obtain your desires. If you deny the power of magic after having called upon it with success, you will lose all you have obtained.
8. Do not complain about anything to which you need not subject yourself.
9. Do not harm little children.
10. Do not kill non-human animals unless you are attacked or for your food.
11. When walking in open territory, bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask him to stop. If he does not stop, destroy him.

And The Nine Satanic Sins:

1. Stupidity—The top of the list for Satanic Sins. The Cardinal Sin of Satanism. It’s too bad that stupidity isn’t painful. Ignorance is one thing, but our society thrives increasingly on stupidity. It depends on people going along with whatever they are told. The media promotes a cultivated stupidity as a posture that is not only acceptable but laudable. Satanists must learn to see through the tricks and cannot afford to be stupid.
2. Pretentiousness—Empty posturing can be most irritating and isn’t applying the cardinal rules of Lesser Magic. On equal footing with stupidity for what keeps the money in circulation these days. Everyone’s made to feel like a big shot, whether they can come up with the goods or not.
3. Solipsism—Can be very dangerous for Satanists. Projecting your reactions, responses and sensibilities onto someone who is probably far less attuned than you are. It is the mistake of expecting people to give you the same consideration, courtesy and respect that you naturally give them. They won’t. Instead, Satanists must strive to apply the dictum of “Do unto others as they do unto you.” It’s work for most of us and requires constant vigilance lest you slip into a comfortable illusion of everyone being like you. As has been said, certain utopias would be ideal in a nation of philosophers, but unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately, from a Machiavellian standpoint) we are far from that point.
4. Self-deceit—It’s in the “Nine Satanic Statements” but deserves to be repeated here. Another cardinal sin. We must not pay homage to any of the sacred cows presented to us, including the roles we are expected to play ourselves. The only time self-deceit should be entered into is when it’s fun, and with awareness. But then, it’s not self-deceit!
5. Herd Conformity—That’s obvious from a Satanic stance. It’s all right to conform to a person’s wishes, if it ultimately benefits you. But only fools follow along with the herd, letting an impersonal entity dictate to you. The key is to choose a master wisely instead of being enslaved by the whims of the many.
6. Lack of Perspective—Again, this one can lead to a lot of pain for a Satanist. You must never lose sight of who and what you are, and what a threat you can be, by your very existence. We are making history right now, every day. Always keep the wider historical and social picture in mind. That is an important key to both Lesser and Greater Magic. See the patterns and fit things together as you want the pieces to fall into place. Do not be swayed by herd constraints—know that you are working on another level entirely from the rest of the world.
7. Forgetfulness of Past Orthodoxies—Be aware that this is one of the keys to brainwashing people into accepting something new and different, when in reality it’s something that was once widely accepted but is now presented in a new package. We are expected to rave about the genius of the creator and forget the original. This makes for a disposable society.
8. Counterproductive Pride—That first word is important. Pride is great up to the point you begin to throw out the baby with the bathwater. The rule of Satanism is: if it works for you, great. When it stops working for you, when you’ve painted yourself into a corner and the only way out is to say, I’m sorry, I made a mistake, I wish we could compromise somehow, then do it.
9. Lack of Aesthetics—This is the physical application of the Balance Factor. Aesthetics is important in Lesser Magic and should be cultivated. It is obvious that no one can collect any money off classical standards of beauty and form most of the time so they are discouraged in a consumer society, but an eye for beauty, for balance, is an essential Satanic tool and must be applied for greatest magical effectiveness. It’s not what’s supposed to be pleasing—it’s what is. Aesthetics is a personal thing, reflective of one’s own nature, but there are universally pleasing and harmonious configurations that should not be denied.

In answer to the OP's question, LaVey's The Satanic Bible can be found online or in most large bookshops.

[Moved to Spirituality as this has no relevance to Paganism, though Settians could be argued to be both Satanists and Pagans depending on how exactly you define your terms, they are different again to LaVey's Church].

Dades

11. When walking in open territory, bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask him to stop. If he does not stop, destroy him.

That is legendary.

joseph dawton

There is no such thing, at least not in antiquity (Anton Levay does not really count). A host of grimoires exist which is as close as you might get. The Necromonicon is often believed to be a 'satanic bible' but was infact a history by Abdul Alhazred (the mad arab). Other works by Agrippa, Levi, Bruno etc and the important texts such as ''The Key of Solomon' point to divination and use of celestial beings (both dark and light) but they are not satanic, only occult works given a bad name.

Satanism exists more as a twisted idea employed by curious kids and power obsessed fools rather than an organised religion, most of our ideas about it seem to come from horror films and have little basis in fact.

http://www.electricpublications.com

Talliesin

joseph dawton wrote:

There is no such thing, at least not in antiquity (Anton Levay does not really count).

Of course LaVey makes no claim to have unearthed any sort of antique, none the less it is a Bible, that is to say a book, which serves as the primary text of a religion that labels itself "Satanic".

joseph dawton wrote:

The Necromonicon is often believed to be a 'satanic bible' but was infact a history by Abdul Alhazred (the mad arab).

It's also of course a fictious book first described by H P Lovecraft and later written as a hoax (or more accurately, later a handful of different works of varying quality were written as hoaxes by separate authors).

joseph dawton wrote:

Other works by Agrippa, Levi, Bruno etc and the important texts such as ''The Key of Solomon' point to divination and use of celestial beings (both dark and light) but they are not satanic, only occult works given a bad name.

I don't even see much point in considering such works at all in response to the OPs question, except perhaps that they are generally much more worth reading in my opinion than LaVey's work.

joseph dawton wrote:

Satanism exists more as a twisted idea employed by curious kids and power obsessed fools rather than an organised religion, most of our ideas about it seem to come from horror films and have little basis in fact.

I see no reason to dismiss Satanism as a religion, and one that can be claimed as "organised" to at least some extent. I'm not much of a fan of LaVey, but one should give the devil his due, so to speak.

joseph dawton

Lovecraft's claim was outrageous in that he knew it would be hard to prove him wrong, whether true or not it has been assumed as the truth by most. I am not sure what the truth is but there is strong evidence that it does/did exist. See below for more info:
http://www.digital-brilliance.com/necron/necron.htm

As for the other texts, these works form the basis of most modern occult practice in the west and through their misinterpretation in the media etc have helped form modern ideas about devil worship, raising demons etc, hence I think they are as relevant a source as anyone is likely to find on the origins of both ceremonial magic and 'satanism'.

http://www.electricpublications.com

Dagon

To Numina, the original poster, if you want a copy of the Satanic Bible, you can have mine! I bought as a curious teenager and I see little use for it now.

It's not quite as sinister as you would think; more of a gospel for rebellious, pissed off teenagers who are interested in dark music and art. There isn't really anything spiritual in it, which also makes it deceptively harmless. However, these book will not bring you or those around you any happiness...

bounty_hunter

Dagon wrote:

However, these book will not bring you or those around you any happiness...

I don't think the OP expects any happiness from it, he's just curious. And I must admit it's an interesting read, as long as you keep an open mind about it.

Dagon

yeah, it's definitely an interesting read alright. La Vey was an intelligent and articulate individual!