An American Appraisal

cjs19

Been toying with the idea of putting this up here as it may cause offence to some Americans, although that seems to be the trend these days so here it is anyway... any comments welcome.



Therapy in Liberty Land

Your next guest, your fair representation,
Why did you do that, not see it’s wrong
I feel that I could never live without it,
Do you know how they go from one to two?
At this point you say that logically...
What if? intelligence, Love and caring
Wouldnt that be, I can’t trust myself because I’m a slave
Isnt this a vountary thing? Just quit. Psychologically
Life looks bleary
Such a wonderful person
He's gonna die
Your brain is like, what are we doin?
Do you think I know what I’m doin?
I’m gonna tell you what you need to do this,
You need to stay there,
You are dying as you sit there before me today,
Were reachin out, you need to grab hold.

Ha, ha you talk, you jest, you play amid the things I messd,
Around around around I go, and who are you to know whats no
But degree upon the doctor said, that I should stay and fill my head
Ha, ha you talk, you jest, you say, but I know what I will someday.

And all around Liberty Land, the boxes spout their spasms,
The contrast with the carousels and tinkly little forest chimes,
Creeps a little closer in the vehement, sultry night.

(Lines 1-16 taken from TV Show Dr. Phil)

BEAT

well, I generally stay away from pieces that I have nothing good to say about but I cant help myself.

There isnt anything in here that I can see as offensive as far as personal offense goes.
What I take offense to is the complete and total lack of writing skill.
Nothing flows..its all jumbled together and the piece in whole makes little sense.

Im all for political prose...try again maybe you can make something out of it.

cjs19

Thanks for the feedback. However a total lack of writing skill, I think was a bit extreme. If you dont find anything offensive then youre probably not American, if you are then you might consider re-reading it. I never said it would be easy to make sense of but if you really think it's "all jumbled up" then youve missed the point entirely. There is an underlying comment in the Dr. Phil extract, in the placing of the phrases and in fact it is a dialogue between the American megalomaniac ideal and the therapeutic world. Try a little harder next reading. Thanks for your critique though. If you still dont understand, then Im sorry, but Im not about to simplify it for one person.

BEAT

I need no explanation. It is written horribly.
the end.