Communal showers

coug01

I am a guy 19 and I Play soccer every week
my problem is I am too shy to have a shower with the lads after the match. I am not gay ,
After each match I go to the dressing room look around and then make excuses and rush off home in order to avoid showering with them, I look around the dressing room and I feel the lad are much better endowed then me and llok more mature please help does every boby feel like this at some time?

AARRRGH

I don't think anyone likes communal showers. And I doubt they are all better endowed than you!

Don't worry about it. Just go home and have your shower. If anyone picks you up on it just make a joke about it (There's no way I'm having a shower with you queers looking at me...! etc etc.)

Endurance Man

Hell, i wouldnt shower with other men no matter how well endowed i was :eek: , i just wouldnt. I dont think you should worry about it .

cruiserweight

I play soccer 3 times a week and have no problem with communal showers, normally because I am heading back to my office or for a few drinks afterwards! But there are some of the guys, who like you go home and nobody ever says anything to them, and if they did it would be just messing!

seamus

Penises always look bigger from a third-party perspective. Nobody would be thinking any less of you for not doing it. Just be aware that everyone else is doing their best *not* to look at anyone else's, it's not like they're going to bring it up in any arena.

BeardyGit

Tell them you have a shower with your girlfriend when you get home....

padser

dublindude wrote:

And I doubt they are all better endowed than you!

Don't worry about it. Just go home and have your shower. If anyone picks you up on it just make a joke about it (There's no way I'm having a shower with you queers looking at me...! etc etc.)

Firstly if thinks they are better endowed then him, and he has seen them walking into the showers, I dont see how he could be wrong (and def dont see how you could know better)!

Secondly the answer surely is not to call them all queers......thats really going to lead to everyone leaving him alone about it!

My 2 cents would be just to bite the bullet and dive in. In my experience
a) there is very little said about penis sizes in communal showers for a number of reasons. No one wants to be seen to be looking at other men. No one is particularly proud of their size when its on the flop (as it should be in a all male communal shower) and if it isnt it would be a lot worse from a slagging point of view
b)most ppl are embarrased the first couple of times. I went to an all boys school with loads of sports etc after school so we got over our inhibitions a lot earlier but even then some ppl took longer then others to stop being uneasy about it.

unfortunatly the longer you wait the harder it will be since ppl may notice that its a change in your regular practice.

AARRRGH

padser wrote:

Firstly if thinks they are better endowed then him, and he has seen them walking into the showers, I dont see how he could be wrong (and def dont see how you could know better)!

I somehow doubt he has been staring at their dicks and measuring them with a ruler. More than likely he is just feeling a little paranoid.

padser wrote:

Secondly the answer surely is not to call them all queers......thats really going to lead to everyone leaving him alone about it!

I said make a joke about it. The lads wouldn't actually believe he thinks they are gay. I don't know if you are aware, but it is normal for lads to slag each other off. Of course, he can take your advice and do something he is very uncomfortable with.

Goodshape

coug01 wrote:

does every boby feel like this at some time?

Echoing what others have said, yea I'm sure every one does at some point or other. The comunal shower is hardly the highlight of any day.

If you feel that uncomfortable about it then simply don't bother - go home and have your shower, I seriously doubt anone will think less of you.

At the same time don't be too afraid to just 'join in' -- it's a shower, not an orgy. No one's there to stare at your tackle.

padser

dublindude wrote:

I somehow doubt he has been staring at their dicks and measuring them with a ruler. More than likely he is just feeling a little paranoid.



I said make a joke about it. The lads wouldn't actually believe he thinks they are gay. I don't know if you are aware, but it is normal for lads to slag each other off. Of course, he can take your advice and do something he is very uncomfortable with.

You dont need a ruler to know if something relatively speaking is smaller then something else.

Im simply saying getting into a slagging match is unlikely to help matters.

What would solve the problem once and for all would be to get over his fear, and it would have personal hygiene benifits also.

el tel

If you are worried about you size compared to the other guys in the shower just do what most guys do before hitting the showers - give it a wee shake to 'loosen' it up a little.

But really be careful that you don't give it too much of a stirring (two shakes is a w@nk as they say). A guy in my school did this and he ended up standing in the showers with a semi. 15 years on and this is what he is still remembered for.

padser

Ill be honest El tel. In the old communal showers im inclined to go for the 'less is more' approach. You can always shrug off a bad day with 'its f*cking freezing outside''. There is little or no excuse for having it standing to attention!!

Uthur

Don't sweat it - dudes always think other blokes have bigger ones cos
you are always looking at your own from above and at theirs head on.
They are probably thinking the same thing about you - if they are bothered
thinking about it at all.

Endurance Man

padser wrote:

You dont need a ruler to know if something relatively speaking is smaller then something else.

Im simply saying getting into a slagging match is unlikely to help matters.

What would solve the problem once and for all would be to get over his fear, and it would have personal hygiene benifits also.

I really dont think there is anything wrong with just jumping in your car and showering when you get home. Hell, you could even take a bath with the lady friend, screw showering with a bunch of men.

WhiteWashMan

have a shower. no one cares what your penis looks like.

really.

no one cares.

jump in, the waters lovely.

tommyboo

well in my experience its always the "bigger" lads who are first into the shower, and let them off! there genuinely proud of it but its not really gonna matter when it comes to ladies if they cant chat 'em up!

i never did the whole communal showers thing either cos, being honest, i wouldnt feel comfortable letting them think they've got "one over on me"! id consider myself average, im no mick hucknell like! but i wouldnt even feel a bit awkward walking out to the car without showering. id just come in change the boots for runners and throw on a hoodie and say you'll meet them in the pub later!

you've nothing to be self conscious of in that respect!

Seraphina

you sound even more gay because you just had to add in 'im not gay'
no offence but grow up! its just a shower. stop comparing tackle and wash yourself, thats what the purpose of a shower is. fine if you want to go home and shower, whatever, but i dont get the fuss.
and the fact that it's penis size thats making you embarrassed is just ridiculous. flaccid size doesn't always reflect erect size, and besides, it shouldn't even matter! thats like me not wanting to shower cause some of the girls have bigger boobs than me :rolleyes:

rubadub

tommyboo wrote:

id consider myself average, im no mick hucknell like!

what??

Seraphina wrote:

thats like me not wanting to shower cause some of the girls have bigger boobs than me :rolleyes:

It is not really the same, girls breast size is obvious in normal clothes so it is no surprise if you go in the showers, nobody is going to go "oh my god, jennys tits are tiny!" everybody already knew. Still I am sure many women are uneasy moreso due to body shape or breast shape rather than size. Most womens showers have cubicles while most mens do not, I have heard this is due to the women being far more self concious. What would be more comparable would be if women were unable (for some reason) to shave their pubic hair. I am sure that women with overly hairy genitals would be as embarrassed going into the shower with hair going up to their belly-button as a guy with a small penis. Breast size is not directly linked to sexual satisfaction whereas penis size is (no matter how many size-doesnt matter stuff you hear). Just like the guy who got the semi was remembered a guy in school with a tiny penis may be nicknamed after it, all the local girls finding out etc. A hen party walks past and sees a guy stripped and tied to a lampost with a tiny cock, a stag party walks past a woman stripped and tied up with small breasts, who do you think gets more taunting?

Anyways I bet it is not that small, there is an actual term for that viewing angle thing "something-syndrome" or "something-effect". You are viewing from different angles and it is like an optical illision.

el tel

Telling the boys you have a verruca would be a good excuse not to enter the shower. Alternatively you could even use that as an excuse to wear flip-flops - noone would notice your penis then.

Cake Fiend

I doubt anyone feels really comfortable in a communal shower, and I'd say everyone is probably far too preoccupied with their own self-consciousness to worry about your weiner. Just get it over with and you'll soon get reasonably used to it.

Stark

Just be glad it's not the old days where you'd have to take a shower after school PE and a teacher would be on "shower duty"

Don't worry about size, it's not a thing that anyone notices or even cares about. Your tackle gets smaller the more you work up a sweat anyway, so any lack of endowment will just be attributed to you working hard on the pitch. You're always your own worst critic anyway, so let the body issues aside, no doubt everyone else will have enough of their own body issues for them to worry about yours

padser

el tel wrote:

Telling the boys you have a verruca would be a good excuse not to enter the shower. Alternatively you could even use that as an excuse to wear flip-flops - noone would notice your penis then.

Got to take my hat off to you el tel. That is by far the best advice so far. Hell you could be without a penis and no one would notice!

Endurance Man

padser wrote:

Got to take my hat off to you el tel. That is by far the best advice so far. Hell you could be without a penis and no one would notice!

You dont have to have any excuse for heavens sake, if you dont wanna shower infront of a bunch of men, dont! You dont have to explain to them why and give them reasons, you just dont have to.

chuci

wear a swimsuit/trunks problem sorted

BeardyGit

chuci wrote:

wear a swimsuit/trunks problem sorted

Then you've to contend with the rather high probability that a wedgy will be served upon your nether-regions. I know it's childish and immature....But believe me, it would be far too hilarious and WAAAAY to easy to pass up on....

I'm not being unhelpful, I'm just pointing out to our female co-contributor that boys will always be boys. And the shower room is not a haven of immunity....

If you don't want to shower with a bunch of blokes walking around with their dongs hanging out like they're the only ones gifted with a penis, I really can't fault you. Just go home, straight to the pub or whatever you normally do afterwards. Deodorant will buy you enough time for a couple of beers or the lift home until you can shower in comfort.

Cheerio,

Gil

the Guru

dont worry , I cant stand them either , showering with other men is just not for some people , just keep on doing what your are doing , or you could do some stretching for a while after the game that way all your team mates will be out of the shower and you can head in.

the Guru

chuci wrote:

wear a swimsuit/trunks problem sorted

Ha ha it does not work that way in the boys changing room , he will get destroyed , then they will wonder why he is wearing speedo's and make his situation worse.

nitrogen

I'm 24, never had communal showers and never will! Don't feel bad about it mate. I have mates that wouldn't even piss in a urinal, shower with men! Forget it!

Uthur

nitrogen wrote:

I'm 24, never had communal showers and never will! Don't feel bad about it mate. I have mates that wouldn't even piss in a urinal, shower with men! Forget it!

Yeah I hate that too. Some joker with a massive wanger down to his knees
always has to stand beside you when you're trying to go! It makes you
so self-conscious you can't squeeze out a drop. Then they always put
an arm around your shoulders and it all goes bad after that I find

Canis Lupus

Seraphina wrote:

you sound even more gay because you just had to add in 'im not gay'
no offence but grow up! its just a shower. stop comparing tackle and wash yourself, thats what the purpose of a shower is. fine if you want to go home and shower, whatever, but i dont get the fuss.
and the fact that it's penis size thats making you embarrassed is just ridiculous. flaccid size doesn't always reflect erect size, and besides, it shouldn't even matter! thats like me not wanting to shower cause some of the girls have bigger boobs than me :rolleyes:

Your a girl, you don't understand

OP Do whatever makes you comfortable, Seraphina does make a good point in so far as there is no reason to make an issue out of either option, some stay some go home no one really gives it any thought.

WhiteWashMan

yeah, because guys in the shower are really that worried about the size of someone elses knob.

listen, if youre not comfortable, then just dont get in the shower.

its really f*cking easy. if you dont like it, then dont do it.

Lex_Diamonds

This little trick works well for me; whip a sound system of some sort out of your bag/locker, then start up Stone Roses - Fools Gold. Then just start swinging your mickey like you own the place and strut confidently into the shower. The more noncholant, the better tbh.

padser

WhiteWashMan wrote:

listen, if youre not comfortable, then just dont get in the shower.

its really f*cking easy. if you dont like it, then dont do it.

In fairness its not that easy at all. The problem is that not doing it will get noticed in the long run, and that will lead to a slagging which is i assume what was trying to be avoided in the first place

Manic Moran

You think that's bad, try communal toilets.

Yes, a row of five or six toilets, all in a row, with no barriers, partitions, curtains, or anything of the sort. Just everyone sitting down side by side, in one big, happy family.

<sigh> Gotta love the Army.

NTM

Atrocity

Stark wrote:

Just be glad it's not the old days where you'd have to take a shower after school PE and a teacher would be on "shower duty"

most merciful lord jesus, are you serious? shudder.

rsynnott

Hmm, it would never have occurred to me that this was an issue.

Look, it's very, very unlikely that anyone is noting down dimensions. Even if they were, what on earth would they do with them? Don't worry about it.

rubadub

Atrocity wrote:

most merciful lord jesus, are you serious? shudder.

at least we weren't in the states. I have read that most schools up to the early 80's made guys swim naked during gym class. The girls were allowed wear costumes for "sanitary reasons" i.e. keeping the gee-rag in place. There were stories in mixed schools of girls in the gym next to them seeing their male classmates when a door was opened, or girls being able to spy from certain places. It was usually a male teacher but there was a story of the swim teacher being sick and the female coach in her 20's having to take a class of 15 year olds. now thats not right...

SexeeAussie

Dear oh dear boys, boys.......

Just remember bigger is NOT necessarily better...........

I always figure it's a bit like the gym scenario.......the blokes at the gym are never checking out the muscles of the other gymmers....they are too busy checking themselves out in the mirrors. Be happy with who you are...memba you are more a person than your cock size or what not

Dave!

rubadub wrote:

at least we weren't in the states. I have read that most schools up to the early 80's made guys swim naked during gym class. The girls were allowed wear costumes for "sanitary reasons" i.e. keeping the gee-rag in place. There were stories in mixed schools of girls in the gym next to them seeing their male classmates when a door was opened, or girls being able to spy from certain places. It was usually a male teacher but there was a story of the swim teacher being sick and the female coach in her 20's having to take a class of 15 year olds. now thats not right...

Oh good lord... !

el tel

SexeeAussie wrote:

Dear oh dear boys, boys.......

Just remember bigger is NOT necessarily better...........

I always figure it's a bit like the gym scenario.......the blokes at the gym are never checking out the muscles of the other gymmers....they are too busy checking themselves out in the mirrors. Be happy with who you are...memba you are more a person than your cock size or what not

Yeah, as Al Murray – The Pub Landlord - says, size isn't important when you have a great big c0ck.

WhiteWashMan wrote:

have a shower. no one cares what your penis looks like.

really.

no one cares.

jump in, the waters lovely.

^^The best and most poetic advice ever ^^

coug01

Hi Guys thank you for your advice and reassurance really appreciate it, I did not mention the other reason for most of the shyness is recently I was circumcised and have not told anybody still healing, being different will really make people notice will I make a joke about it or say nothing. I don’t think any of the other lads are circumcised.

daveyjoe

Uthur wrote:

Don't sweat it - dudes always think other blokes have bigger ones cos
you are always looking at your own from above and at theirs head on.

The other lads might not appreciate you looking at their willies head on.

It's no big deal from my (very limited) experience they all look about the same size anyway *.

* I'm not looking or anything but sometimes you'd catch a glimpse out of the corner of your eye, yes, I'm aware of how gay that sounds.

WhiteWashMan

padser wrote:

In fairness its not that easy at all. The problem is that not doing it will get noticed in the long run, and that will lead to a slagging which is i assume what was trying to be avoided in the first place

yeah. it is.

what do you suggest then?

perhaps gather all the lads around and give them a lecture on not slagging someone off becuase its not nice?

so let me see if i have this right?
someone wont go into the showers becuase theyre afraid of being slagged, but they dont want to go without, for fear of getting slagged?

bit of a no win situation there. i guess it doesnt matter what you do then!

el tel

coug01 wrote:

Hi Guys thank you for your advice and reassurance really appreciate it, I did not mention the other reason for most of the shyness is recently I was circumcised and have not told anybody still healing, being different will really make people notice will I make a joke about it or say nothing. I don’t think any of the other lads are circumcised.

Ahh you've been circimsized! Well I don't know if you doctor told you this but you shouldn't really be playing soccer or contact sports when your Jon Bon Jovi is still healing.

rsynnott

coug01 wrote:

Hi Guys thank you for your advice and reassurance really appreciate it, I did not mention the other reason for most of the shyness is recently I was circumcised and have not told anybody still healing, being different will really make people notice will I make a joke about it or say nothing. I don’t think any of the other lads are circumcised.

I'm circumcised (again not from birth) - people have never mentioned it in showers. It's uncommon here, but not HUGELY uncommon.

AARRRGH

I really don't think the other lads will be staring at your dick in the shower. They certainly won't be examining you to see if you have a foreskin!!

Personally, I don't like communal showers, but not because other blokes will be looking at me, but because the idea of being in a room with a bunch of naked guys is less appealing then wandering home and having a nice shower in my bathroom...

Civilian_Target

OK - I'm sure much of this has been covered before but:

a) If you look at a cylinder at 5° and at 70°, from which angle does it appear bigger? Same goes for your penis.
b) Do you think that guys actually look at each other's cocks in the changing room? Of course not!
c) Even if they do, what does it matter that a bunch of lads have seen your cock? Like you said, you're not gay.

The fact is, communal showering and changing rooms are a bit strange the first time you use them, and the second, and the third. By the 10th time you won't even notice. Get on with it.

Atrocity

someone's bound to get a glance at your willy wonka.. but nothing will be said about it. Unless it was one of those real tiny penises, then maybe there'd be a joke or something.. but nothing would really happen

SexeeAussie

Atrocity wrote:

someone's bound to get a glance at your willy wonka.. but nothing will be said about it. Unless it was one of those real tiny penises

Meaning?????

rubadub

el tel wrote:

when your Jon Bon Jovi is still healing.

I dont like his music, but calling him an out and out prick is a bit harsh

solution- give up the footie!
I think the smaller it is the less likely you are to be slagged. I was a bit overweight and got slaggings in work, from friends etc, but truely obese people do not get the same slaggings. But you said you are 19 I think people will not be slagging at that age.

fischerspooner

I actually enjoy the communal showers after training. We're always talking about what we're doing that night and joking etc. If you think any of the lads care about your body or penis you're crazy. There's a whole showering naked together etiqutte that comes natural to us, main rule being don't look at their penis area. You can look anywhere else, you can even show cuts etc. on your body but not the penis. Just do it a few times and before you know it you'll be walking around naked without a care in the world, it's great.