Baked Beans

sprinkles

Once there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked
beans.
She loved them but unfortunately, they had always had a very
embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her.

Then one day she met a man and fell in love. When it became
apparent
that they would marry she thought to herself, "He is such a sweet
and
gentle man, he would never go for this carrying on." She made the
supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.

Some months later, her car broke down on the way home from work.
Since she lived in the country she called her husband and told him that she would be late because she had to walk home. On her way, she passed a small diner and the odor of the baked beans was more than she could stand. Since she still had miles to walk, she
figured that she would walk off any ill effects by the time she
reached home. So, she stopped at the diner and before she knew it, she h consumed three large orders of baked beans. All the way home she putt-putted, and upon arriving home she felt reasonably sure she could control it. Her husband seemed excite to see her and exclaimed delightedly,
"Darling, I have a surprise for dinner tonight."

He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the table. Sh seated herself and just as he was about to remove the blindfol from his wife, the telephone rang. He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned. He then went to answer the telephone.

The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband was out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight to one side and let it go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of pulpwood mill. She took her
napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously. Then, she shifted to the
other cheek and ripped three more, which reminded her of cooked cabbage

Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, she
went on like this for another ten minutes. When the telephone farewell
signaled the end of her freedom, she fanned the air a few more
times with her napkin, placed it on her lap and folded her hands upon
it, smiling contentedly to herself. She was the picture of innocence
when her husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked he
if she peeked and she assured him that she had not.


At this point, he removed the blindfold ... and she was
surprised!!

There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish
her a "Happy Birthday"!!!

Spalk0

While id hate to burst your bubbly on this i think i posted that joke a couple of days ago!.....sorry!.....mind you, its very funny though!

sprinkles

Damn it! Got in a email today, thought it was hillarious, decided to share. Ah well