22M + 17F - ok or not?

anothervictim

This question mightnt be as serious as some of the others here but its wreckin my head and nobody that i ask gives me a straight answer. So, does anybody here have an opinion on whether or not its ok for a 17 year old girl to go out with a 22 year old fella.

Tiriel

dont' think it'd be a problem but her circumstances would make a difference.. I mean is she doing her Leaving Cert or is she in college? depends on her maturity too.. but yeah I think if u both like each other go for it

elivsvonchiaing

This depends on a LOT of variables... In principle if they are of like and sound/mature mind -yes. Other way - very unlikely to happen - fellas mature slower. Biggest problem here imho is society. By society's narrow standards this is often not acceptable. Biggest obstacle - her dad - if he's cool with it- think eveyone else might buy in. But my own feeling is all of this is a long-shot! Biggest problem definitely her dad/step-dad/maybe elder brother!

Zaph

Don't see the problem myself, once they're both reasonably mature. When he was 21 my brother started going out with a 16 year old. 10 years later they're still together and gor married a couple of years ago. So it can work.

Capt'n Midnight

22M + 17F - ok or not?

F=M/2+7 - close..

Nuttzz

if there is grass on the pitch then its playable.....

4 years in nothing, get over it

mayordenis

Capt'n Midnight wrote:

F=M/2+7 - close..

thats the rule as long as your close to that its ok so no problems and yeah 4 years matters not

chump

stick it in and win

as for my advice... play ball, or let her play ball

MrNuked

Irish law states that it is legal for 17 year old guys to sleep with 17 year old girls, but it is not legal for 18 year old guys to do so.
It's ok, in the sense that it's not immoral, but 17 year olds are kids, and as such she is highly likely to wreck your head.

PaddyjDunne

as long as shes good looking, bop her silly

ballooba

Nuttzz wrote:

if there is grass on the pitch then its playable.....

4 years in nothing, get over it

Isn't 22 - 17 = 5???

Has the whole world gone topsy-turvy?

koneko

17-year-old girls can be fairly mature (compared to some 17-year-old lads). I wouldn't really say it's a problem unless her family make it a problem. Maybe keep it low-key until she's 18 though, if there's the chance her family or other people make it an issue.

Nuttzz

what makes anyone think that a 22 year old male is that mature?

cajun_tiger

its leagal there for ok

Sleepy

Well, cajun, as MrNuked pointed out, it's not actually legal as 17 only stands as the age of consent when both parties are 17. Otherwise you have to be over 18.

I think Koneko gave the right advice. Go for it but keep the relationship fairly low-key until she turns 18. Is that any time soon?

pretty-in-pink

personally haveing tried that I would say keep away, but mine was a bad experience so I'm biased. I wouldn't try it again, and going out to places could be hard with a kid in tow. unless your the chick? I wouldn't be so up on the trusting older guys bit.....

1 really bad experience
1 funny on reflection but kinda fcuked up experience.

its your decision, so do what feels right for you both

cajun_tiger

what i read was that 16 year old is leagal for men and 17 for women
nothing to do with there partners age as long as they are over that age 16 for m 17 for f

DapperGent

Sleepy wrote:

Well, cajun, as MrNuked pointed out, it's not actually legal as 17 only stands as the age of consent when both parties are 17. Otherwise you have to be over 18.

I don't think this is correct. Once anyone hits seventeen they can do what they like sexually.

woosaysdan

go for it if anything happens or she wrecks your head blame the age difference as the reason for breaking up!!!

Gordon

If it's legal I don't see a problem with such a difference, if the two parties are into each other.

If people are debating their thoughts on the legalities can you at least back up your claims of what the legalities are. Provide Governmental links please.

DapperGent

http://www.ageofconsent.com/ireland.htm

seamus

http://www.interpol.int/Public/Children/SexualAbuse/NationalLaws/csaIreland.asp

Age of consent for sexual activity

The legal age at which a person is currently competent to consent to sexual intercourse is currently seventeen (17) years.

http://www.oasis.gov.ie/relationships/

The age of consent to sexual activity is 17 and it may be a criminal offence to have sex with a person under the age of 17. This means that providers of contraceptive services are entitled to refuse to provide those services to people under 17. In general the age of consent for health services purposes is 16. There is no doubt that services may not be refused to adults - that is, anyone aged 18 or over.

It's 17, there are no special cases or prerequisites once both parties are 17 or over.

I dunno how stuff like this gets made up and passed around.

The Corinthian

MrNuked wrote:

Irish law states that it is legal for 17 year old guys to sleep with 17 year old girls, but it is not legal for 18 year old guys to do so.

Incorrect - go read DapperGent's link.

I remember being in much the same position as the original poster. For me ther psychological barrier was as much that the girl in question was three months younger than my baby sister as the age difference.

She was also a model and had been on the cover of Image magazine.

Somehow, I got over the age difference dilemma.

JackKelly

said before but stick with the rule, half your age plus seven, or thereabouts

MrNuked

Further proof that my sanity is deteriorating. I have a clear memory of looking this up and it being correct.
Maybe I read it wrong.

Ren0

Its 100%. 5 Years isn't that much of a big deal.

If she was 5 years older than u then it would be issuse, cos girls want to get married and have kids (the majority anyway).

Coconut

On the age of consent thing, I once had somebody try to convince me that it was 16 in Ireland and refused to believe me that it was 17. Her watertight reason being she had received birthday cards on her 16th that implied she was now 'of age' etc.

I hadn't the heart to tell her the cards, like most, were obviously English ones..

The Corinthian

Coconut wrote:

On the age of consent thing, I once had somebody try to convince me that it was 16 in Ireland and refused to believe me that it was 17. Her watertight reason being she had received birthday cards on her 16th that implied she was now 'of age' etc.

I hadn't the heart to tell her the cards, like most, were obviously English ones..

She probably has a very easy job. The kind that robots will be doing some day.

anothervictim

oh my god theres an ad at the top of the page for a statutory rape lawyor. I expected a lot of people to frown upon it but your all so open minded. I feel better, thanks.

seamus

anothervictim wrote:

oh my god theres an ad at the top of the page for a statutory rape lawyor..

LMAO

/me hugs google ads

It'e legal. She's young and nubile. Can't see any reason not to tbh

Tiriel

maybe you're not so ok with it yourself and need reassurance from others? be confident in your decision and respect it. otherwise you'll be very confused and will only end up hurting both of ye.. even though that's the last thing you mean to do

anothervictim

yes i do need reasurance from others, thats why i wrote the post. and thanks.

Stench Blossoms

Im 18 and im going out with a 23 year old but to be honest i'd probably be more mature than him.

nobodythere

I have a friend who was 23 with a 17 year old. he had a problem with her not being 18 yet -- I.e. she had to answer to her parents who wouldn't really let her anywhere even though she was in college and as well she had a problem getting into pubs without ID so he couldn't really go out with her. Just be aware of that.

With age difference on moral issues it's really about individual maturity at this stage.

unkel

orla wrote:

Im 18 and im going out with a 23 year old but to be honest i'd probably be more mature than him.

Fair play orla, I'd say you're probably right

My youngest sister met her fella when she was only 16 (just before her 17th birthday) and he was 22 and a half. None of us ever had a reason to even think it wasn't right. BTW they're happily married with two baby girls now

A bit off/topic but I would like to see all current legislation changed so as to recognise that any 16 year old is regarded to be an adult...

DapperGent

orla wrote:

Im 18 and im going out with a 23 year old but to be honest i'd probably be more mature than him.

I'd say you're not but have managed to convince yourself otherwise.

unkel

Capt'n Midnight wrote:

F=M/2+7 - close..

That's an old camel-lovers definition, isn't it? Not really applicable as a law in these parts of the world :rolleyes:

Stench Blossoms

DapperGent wrote:

I'd say you're not but have managed to convince yourself otherwise.

you dont actually know me so how can you make a comment like that?
i no exactly where im going in life...he'd rather think bout where he;s gonnna go drinkin next weekend

YellowEllo

well the general rule is half ur age plus seven, or plus eigh if she is hot. :rolleyes: