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tattoo poem

Silent Grape · 2004-10-23 18:25:19

This is a poem i wrote about my new tattoo, again, feel free to critisize. This swirly twirly writing, Entwining my wrist, Tightening, and releasing Burning and cutting Freeing and hoping - For another day, Another chance, Another way around the wrist.

23-10-2004 6:25pm

#1

Silent Grape

Closed Accounts Posts: 574 ✭✭✭

Join Date: March 2002

Posts: 517

This is a poem i wrote about my new tattoo, again, feel free to critisize.

This swirly twirly writing,
Entwining my wrist,
Tightening, and releasing
Burning and cutting
Freeing and hoping -

For another day,
Another chance,
Another way around the wrist.

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Comments

#2 24-10-2004 11:10am

shiv

Closed Accounts Posts: 408 ✭✭

Join Date: July 2004

Posts: 335

i like it, especially the first and last lines

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#3 27-10-2004 11:14am

Silent Grape

Closed Accounts Posts: 574 ✭✭✭

Join Date: March 2002

Posts: 517

cheers, thanks. still working on the first stanza, seems a bit twee and obvious to me, but anyway, thanks

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#4 28-10-2004 1:53pm

Shad0r

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,167 ✭✭✭

Join Date: October 1999

Posts: 1030

I like it, I think mainly because it says alot without saying alot.

If that makes any sense.

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