May the acord guide you to wisdom

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

put this on another forum in response to.. nothing much, I don't have a site to put it on atm so I thought I'd put it here. I just want to waste boards bandwith :0 (yes, I know, My punctuation is, terrible. I don't care,)

(This was written in response to allegations made by myself that the squirrel empire was the force behind a strange series of events on this forum)

after careful consideration of the facts,I have concluded that the squirrels had absolutely *nothing* to do with this. I want to make it clear that my initial assumption was not only false, but offensive to the proud Squirrel race. The Squirrel Empire wants nothing more than to live alongside the human race as equals, sharing in our public transport systems, medicines, literature and pornography. In return they will give us a gift that evolution foolishly deemed unneccesary, that's right.. they will teach us the secrets of acorn hoarding.
We are not yet prepared for the awesome responsibilites this power brings with it, but with guidance from the great bushy tailed herself it is this squirrel lovers hope that one day we will put aside our short-sighted 'freedoms' and subject ourselves williningly and completely to securing the stability of Squirrelus Pottus; the holy land spoken of to twitchtwitchsqueaktwitch the third in the seventh quadrant of being, whereupon he pilgrimmaged on the onset of winter after giving all his stored acorns to starving orphan squirrels (side note: On his return, he discovered that the green tailed squirrels in the crowd took control of the acorn reserves in his absence, using the power this gave them to briefly live as gods on the treetops. His rage was swift and holy. Haven't you ever wondered why you don't see any green tailed squirrels around? well now you know. perhaps in time, we will come to accept that we are not so different from our squirrel brothers after all).

Incidentally, I wish my family the best of luck in their new life among the squirrels. They are staying in the palace of King Simon* as honoured** guests*** . of the empire. I am told they are free to leave at any time of their choosing, they simply prefer life tilling the acord fields. And why wouldn't they?


*(it has become fashionable in recent years for younger squirrels to adopt human names, mainly for shock value)

**(the letter said treasured, but I assume this to be a mistake in the translation)

***(another mistake here, instead of guests was written "property". I believe there are still some subtleties to the english language that have so far escaped the grasp of the great ones)

BEAT

nicewan Mordie...you can post whatever you like in here