bursting into tears

Agent Smith

i just did something i havent done for a long time,
i just burst into tear's for no apparent reason,

i dont know what brought this on, i just started crying and the next thing i know is that i'm just in tear's remembering all the upseting things that's happened to me...
my grandfather dying from prostate cancer when i was 2, my grandmother's alzimerzer's, my first dog oscar getting knocked down in front of me when i was 6, my friend monica commiting suidide after i told her i loved her, but wasnt in love with her,

it just all flooded back, and many more painfull memory, and mistakes in my life that changed the course of my relationships with people,


now i'm sitting here all upset, on my own, alone and i just feel depressed.

this ever happen to anyone else?



joe

Peewee_lane

Of course babe...to everyone.Our bodies have chemicals that continuosly re-act with each other,making us feel the way we do.Too much of one can be good..great at times,then,other times can be bad.That great feeling of love inside us is just that chemical pumping harder,and that feeling of sadness is just the same.

You never know which way your serotonin gland is gonna swing..theres nothing wrong with your head,theres nothing wrong with you,you gotta remember that crying is a great healing process,it allows you to weep, feel like a child again,and that depressed feelin is when you need someone to hold you,and cradle you,and make thigs go away.Were all just big kids like that.

Dont cry...I got one of them a few weeks ago...outa the blue...and I was so happy at the time! Theres nothin wrong with wakin up one day and thinkin over all the ****ty things in your life..and then havin a little cry over it all.It goes away if you'll let it.Dont ponder over mistakes...its just another part of someones elses story in the end.

Im sorry about your memories...you should use them to strengthen yourself as a person,perhaps you have someone who knows you a bit better who wouldnt mind listnin to a few moans over a cup of tea...?

Chin up kiddo

xxxx

Sleepy

It used to happen me in my late teens a bit alright. Perfectly healthy though. It's your body just letting go, think of it as a release valve. Make a cup of tea for yourself and watch a dense comedy like Zoolander or something...

blondie83

Yeah don't worry Joe, it happens to everyone at some stage or other. And it always seems like it's just come out of nowhere, and for no reason. It's good for us to cry every now and again though - just to let everything out! Like peewee_lane said, get a good friend and chat about it over a few cups of tea. You'd be amazed how much better you feel about stuff when you talk about it with someone you trust

Zulu

Don't think twice about it. Chin up buddy. Cuppa tea, a spliff, and a games of somthing should cheers you up.

Beruthiel

honestly joe,
you've had some sh!t happen to you over the last while, it has to come out somewhere, better out than in!
just be nice to yourself

Sleepy

Beruthiel wrote:

honestly joe,
you've had some sh!t happen to you over the last while, it has to come out somewhere, better out than in!
just be nice to yourself

Or better yet, find some nice young wan to be nice to you

(I know it's slightly O/T Beruthiel, but it's humour for the purpose of cheering a nice guy up so I think it deserves an exception)

Agent Smith

i dont drink tea...


nah i just went to sleep after that post and i just felt a huge weight lifted ofter my body....


i feel fine now, dont know why i cracked, as Beruthiel said, i have had to deal with a lot of stuff over the last 6 month's...


Sleepy, you got any certain "young wan's" in mind?

joe

Mutant_Fruit

agent smith wrote:

i just did something i havent done for a long time,
i just burst into tear's for no apparent reason,

Sorry to put a downer on the thread, but if this happens to you more than once, you might want think about whether you are suffering from depression or not.

A teacher of mine suffered from depression, and one of the last of the "symtoms" that happened to him before he went to a psychiatrist (i can't spell ) was he burst into tears 3-4 times in the middle of shopping, for no reason.

If its once off, i wouldn't worry about it, but if it happens several times...

Peewee_lane

Jesus Christ man.What are you like? Wouldnt want to be running to you for comfort any time. (1)Joe was just havin a weep over 6months of crap and (2) when someone is upset..or down..I wouldnt turn around and suggest depression.Its not a clever thing to do!You just throw the person down the hill further thinkin there screwed up! Joe said it himself..he slept it off and hes cool now...but in future friend...be careful who you suggest depression to.You never know who might take it that extra step and go on anti depressants for something that requires perhaps, a chat,a hug and just a little re-assurance.

A friend of mine was feeling a little under the weather..and her doctor suggested anti-d's.She took em,and because she was so confused how she felt,why she was feeling upset,and the fact was,she wasnt depressed,just a normal adolescent,and unfourtunetly for her,she developed psychosis from the anti-depressents,and actually really became mentally ill then. Im not saying this happens everyone,but its easy to be depressed,and to take any sort of advice if you desperately want that advice regardless of what it is.

Sorry, didnt want to seem snappy but suggesting depression to someone whos just havin a cry is a little hasty, dont you?

AngelofFire

It could have been because you had an excess amount of sodium chloride in your body(tears are very salty), stress and trauma cause sodium chloride to build up.

Peewee_lane

Absoulutely! Were made up of chemicals,and were eating chemicals in foods and drinks and they in turn get pumped around the body.

lilo moo

agent smith wrote:

i dont drink tea...

i don't drink tea either and i'm in a similar situation. i could be fine for a while and then just feel really upset and have to try really hard to keep in the tears when i'm around people. usually end up feeling worse and have cried myself to sleep. i hate feeling like this and don't know what to do. i'm on holiday visiting family, who i love but don't feel comfortable talking with them about it. i don't have any friends around

LegacyUser

Tea is just hot flavoured water,something we drink that has a stigma attached to it that we "relax" and unwind over it.I think theres a soothing quality to the steam rising out of the cup,or perhaps just the warmth.

A cup of tea doesnt stop you from crying!-Or-feeling how you do..its so very good to talk,and release,but as people enjoy their release over a cup of tea,others have that same feeling if they have a smoke,or write a letter to themselves,or start doing something recreational that you can loose your mind in.Painting,drawing,writing,singing,playing an instrument,having a bath,taking a long walk,re-arranging your room are all also things that you can loose your mind in. It takes the build up of concentration first, to do whatever you choose to do,then after a while,you begin to loose yourself in it,and the sub-conscious takes over thats when those racing,crazy conversations in your head take place with yourself.

Of course,you'll never be able to do all these if you set out and think" Im gonna paint a picture, but you wont let your problems go at all,and you torment yourself over and over,and just end up upsetting yourself. You got to go "right me.Im gonna be totally ****ing selfish and forget everything **** Ive ever done and forget all the **** thats happened to me" and just go to whatever you want to do.

Trust me,I was seriously down the depression road not too long ago,and if you saw me now,Im the happiest thing goin now,I just learnt to forgive myself,and lost myself in music,and that helped me through alot.It wasnt easy,I thought Id be a miserable cold person forever,and even though ****ty things have happened in the last 9 months...I just shake em off,cause Im dead proud I got myself out of how I was,and believe me,I was pretty bad,and it is possible.It really is.

And lilo Moo,depending on how old you are,if I can ask you that? Family are good support. If you feel it would be making them uncomfortable to tell them how you feel sometimes,you may want to question whether they'd be hurt or not if you actually did tell them how you felt.If the answers no- theres always friends,or The Samaritans (dunno the number chek phone book) whom I believe are unbelievably sound folks.

Like I said to Agent Smith---- CHIN UP KIDDO X

lilo moo

Peewee Lane wrote:

And lilo Moo,depending on how old you are,if I can ask you that? Family are good support. If you feel it would be making them uncomfortable to tell them how you feel sometimes,you may want to question whether they'd be hurt or not if you actually did tell them how you felt.If the answers no- theres always friends,or The Samaritans (dunno the number chek phone book) whom I believe are unbelievably sound folks.

thanks for replying peewee. i don't think it would make my family feel uncomfortable, it would make me uncomfortable. they wouldn't be hurt either, i just don't feel able to talk about it with the particular family i'm staying with. because i'm on holidays, i don't have any friends around and won't see them for another three weeks. as for the samaritans, i'd have no promlem calling but again i'm not at home.

(i know tea isn't a cure, i was just telling agent smith that i don't drink it either)

Crash

Joe tbh i know exactly what you mean, been through it all recently.

Had moments between the start of January and a month or two ago where everything that had happened as of late hit me (exam pressure, grandfathers death, a very close friend of mines death in January) and i couldnt do ****. i just shut down. But it passes and it eases tbh.

silverside

it happens man... just give someone a big hug, have a good nights sleap, youll be grand in the morning. as b says better out than in. talk about it with someone (neednet be best buddies) just get it off your chest. Just usual stuff like relations dying, being dumped, losing jobs, stress at work all builds up - totally natural to get a little bit upset.

Doodee

You just had an emotional breakdown. It happens to some moreso than others.
I have a friend who seems to suffer from them quite alot, then again, she is female

I've had it happen once or twice when there was tonnes of pressure on me, really you just need to take you mind off of it. Theres no sure fire method, just really to wait it out. its good to hear that you feeling better though.

Best of luck.

embee

lilo moo wrote:

(i know tea isn't a cure, i was just telling agent smith that i don't drink it either)

I dunno..... the act of sitting down with a friend or loved one and talking and releasing your hurt/frustrations over a cup of tea can be very good for the soul. Works wonders for me, anyways Also, talking to someone you trust and know won't patronise you would be helpful too. A problem shared, and all that.....

Sarky

Also, tea is good for you. It boosts your immune system, amongst other things. Tea heals all.

luckat

Crying is good; when you cry from grief, it releases all kinds of nasty stress chemicals.

But you sound as if you're in a bit of a stress trap there, with too many bad things having happened to you.

You can't bring your grandparents back from their journey, though with Alzheimer's it helps people to visit them, even if they don't seem to know you or remember that you've been there.

And you can't bring back your friend from her suicide; she had a moment of madness and succumbed to it. Nothing you can do now will help; and it's unlikely that anything that you could have done then would have helped either - any more than it could with Alzheimer's.

But if you've had that kind of level of sadness and loss, maybe it's time to look for some help. When things like this happen when you're young, the trouble is that your friends haven't experienced them, so they can't empathise.

From the physical end, you're going to have to make sure that you're eating well, and exercising well. Up your amounts of vitamin C and E and B and folic acid a bit - don't go mad, just take a few vitamins while this is going on, to help you to process the stress. And take exercise every day, to get those endorphins moving. And make sure you're eating properly; the body needs good nourishment for the hard work of processing grief.

Talk to the people who shared your love for your grandparents and your friend. Try writing a few stories - not about what's happened to you; just write what comes into your head.

Whatever you do, don't *draw* anything to do with the traumas you've been through; apparently drawing and painting reactivate the trauma rather than working it through, because of the area of the brain that you use when you draw.

And it might be a good idea to go to your family doctor and ask about grief counselling - explain that you've had these three big losses, and you're finding it hard to take it.

Cry when you need to. Sunt lachrymae rerum...

Paddy20

I have not read through all the posts on this thread.

As all I have to say is that we were given tear ducts for a reason. They are there to be used when needed, and we are damn lucky to have them.

If only people [particularly Males] used them more, we would have less screwed up people all around us ?..

Be happy & lucky