How can I help? [may contain rantings]

LegacyUser

Long time lurker, first time poster (but i read the rules )


So I just learned today that I am going to be an Uncle...

Now the couple is young, both early twenties, and working & living together away from home. They have been going out for a long time now and are madly in love. I've always been careful and my girlfriend agrees with me. Now I know that my borther has confided in me even before telling the folks about it so I'm keeping this one to myself until all the all the family know first, I really dont want to make an ass out of myself and I can see myself in about 10 months time breaking the news of a christening and trying to hurry the girlfriend kicking and screaming into the car.
(she's not on boards... should be in the newbie FAQ, "what you posted/boasted last year will seem like yesterday for the otherhalf if they discover it" )

I havent been this close to friend or couple in this type of situation before...I dont rely on countless years of TV to point me in the right direction...I dont react well to surprizes

<gf>: The house is on FIRE!
*me rubs sleep from his eyes
<me>:...we should get everybody outside...then call the firebrigade
*me grabs robe
<me>: Time to go

Its like the horrible wooden acting of "the house of elliot" or other english period drama I throw under that name...or the Larson cartoon showing two guys fishing in a boat and looking at the mushroom clouds on the horizon, with one saying to the
other "I'll tell you what this means, Norm, no size restrictions and screw
the limit!"
Scroll on 2 days later...

<me> WHAT THE ****?, WHO LEFT THAT ******** POT THERE?, we could have been KILLED!


So when I was told last night about it, playing on my phone at the time, I questioned my sanity for a few moments...looked up and said congratulations, made a small joke about the brother's swimmers, and later I said I was very Happy for the both of them and couldnt think of two of the most awesome people to bring a new life into the world...and then i had to go home where I have mulled over the TV for the last few hours...

Now correct me if I'm wrong but pregnancy can have some tough times, and for a young unmarried couple there could be a lot of strain and hassle...

What I'd like to know is if other boards.ie parents can tell me of nice thoughtful things or ways that friends or siblings helped out at the early stages of pregnancy for a young couple's first time (it's 5 weeks gone atm)... not to call out Mommy's and Pappa's (you can help unregged)

So before the surprize hits me, whats good or whats not, what can help or what gets me excommunicated to a distant Jupiter moon...

I've printed out nearly all of Foxinsocks parenting list for them (thank you... I dont think you can post unregged in Parenting) and I bought a nice bottle of Remy Martin & a pair of Romeo + Juliet which I hope to share with him tomrrow...

Good Idea?, too early?


Cheers

M

Beruthiel

probably a tad too early, but no harm.
I don't mean to be a wet blanket, but anything can happen in the first three months, I personally was very cautious about any type of celebration till I was well past that.
For me, the biggest and best help from my sisters was the baby sitting, especially the help I got on the return from hospital. It's dead scary bringing home a new baby for the first time, especially if you are not used to them. Having help at that stage was only fantastic. Everyone is different though, so when the time comes just ask your brother what you can do to help. Shopping for food, helping with the bottles, washing clothes, all the little things that help make life easier when all you have time for is a baby.

billy the squid

I have been an uncle eight times and each time it was different.

best thing to do is just to offer them help once but don't patronise them they will callupon you when they need you. The fact that they told you first means that they trust you more than anyone else. this is a good thing.