Bit on the side

LegacyUser

Im a builder from the north who is married. Anyway I'm bisexual but my wife doesnt know. I've went with a few fellas who I work with that are married aswell so it's just a bit on the side. This kinda thing happens a good bit in my line of business. Anyone else at this? I know its wrong but its just a bit of fun.

newgrange

I hope you are safe, whatever you get up to, particularly for your wife's sake, since she is unaware of it.

Rock Climber

I'm sometimes shocked surprised and delighted at who turns out to be bisexual.
last night my self and my bf got talking and messing in a club with a lad I've fancied for ages, he asked if he could kiss us.
I certainly didn't mind
Be safe and enjoy

*edit*
Oh on a serious note there is the whole cheating on your wife thing
Either tell her or do not get caught

Jpaulik

Anyone else at this? I know its wrong but its just a bit of fun.

Yeah there's bound to be other dishonest people that cheat on their wives out there.

As for fun, hmmm, looking it up in a dictionary I fail to see where deceiving someone you promised to love and honour for all your days is classed as fun.

Your wife deserves better.

BuffyBot

Hmm.

You know it's wrong but it's just a bit of fun. I'm not going to condemn or criticise because i simply don't know the full facts.

Let's face it though, you aren't the first married bi-sexual guy to do it with guys on the side and you won't be the last. It happens quite lot.

Your post sounds like you feel guilty about it though. We can't really tell you if its right or wrong - you are the only one who can make that desicion, and be comfortable with it. However, as others have said it probably is best to play safe while you are doing it.

Joe23

Having spent several years working on building sites (started young) I have to sy this really really isn't the norm, especailly in Dublin. In fact you probably would be taking your life in your hands.

OfflerCrocGod

I afto agree with Joe23 this is a blatant troll. Sorry to smash some fantasies but this is not normal:rolleyes:.

claire h

Originally posted by OfflerCrocGod
I afto agree with Joe23 this is a blatant troll. Sorry to smash some fantasies but this is not normal:rolleyes:.

Gosh darn it, and the thought of two builders going at it was getting me all hot and bothered!

Joe23

Originally posted by claire h
Gosh darn it, and the thought of two builders going at it was getting me all hot and bothered!

Aint you a Lesbian? Building is mens work... sorry don't kill me. :ninja:

Jpaulik

Actually I know a good few gay builders. They do keep it to themselves though. There's so many people in the building trade now that theres bound to be a big gay population.

Call into some of the gay bars after end of day at the building sites and you'll find them there.

Oh you mean you thought there were no builders that were gay or bisexual and thought anyone that liked same-sex action was a hairdresser ?

Jpaulik

Originally posted by Rock Climber

Either tell her or do not get caught

Would you give the same advice to your bf ?

Stark

Oh you mean you thought there were no builders that were gay or bisexual and thought anyone that liked same-sex action was a hairdresser ?

We're not that narrow-minded, obviously we're aware that there's the hairdressing side of things and then there's the fetish side of things

claire h

Originally posted by Joe23
Aint you a Lesbian? Building is mens work... sorry don't kill me. :ninja:

Bisexual, actually. And turned on by a whole lotta things. Though I must admit the builders comment was rather, um, sarcastic. :rolleyes:

Joe23

Originally posted by Jpaulik
Oh you mean you thought there were no builders that were gay or bisexual and thought anyone that liked same-sex action was a hairdresser ?

Is this directed at me. IF so I ment that while its obvious that there is a gay population in any occupation, In my experience its not something one expresses openingly on a building site due to the nature and attitudes of a fair proportion of the labourers, even then it stil lcauses awkwardness working in close quaters for allot of people in hte trade.

Rock Climber

Originally posted by Jpaulik
Would you give the same advice to your bf ?

If I was sharing him with his wife/girlfriend-YES
Have you not been watching coronation st ;P

Been there done that-monogonomy is boring I know but it's best and it's what I'd advocate.
Theres no substitute for committment and loyalty.
Obviously this builder isn't sexually fulfilled by his wife or he wouldn't be doing this.
He's got to decide whether its worth telling her, with all the hassle that brings or to continue with his bits of lads on the side.
He must have known he liked guys when he got married and theres the complication/bed he made/catch22 or whatever, he passed through that door and now it's eithre (a) repress his gay side or (b) play a bit
First option is probably gonna drive him mad and the second is risky because he's got married and has brought his wife in as a third party who may well get very hurt-theres a right catch22 of his own making.
It's not a situation or a road that I'd recommend anyone in his shoes to have gone down...
But it's too late now he's in the mine field he must do what he feels is best but it could and probably will all blow up in his face.

I just hope he has a good mate if or when it does.

Jpaulik

Originally posted by Rock Climber
If I was sharing him with his wife/girlfriend-YES

It's not sharing, it's him shagging someone without the wifes knowledge. What if you found out your boyfriend was doing the same for a few months and when you found out he said "but didn't you advise someone before to not get caught ? "

Been there done that-monogonomy is boring I know but it's best and it's what I'd advocate.

What an insulting statement. You make it sound like monogamy is the blandest thing around and that it's some kind of compromise thing where you have to choose it in the end.

Monogamy isn't boring, people who can't commit to one person are boring. There's obviously something lacking in a person that they can't be happy with one person and end up cheating on them numerous times.


Obviously this builder isn't sexually fulfilled by his wife or he wouldn't be doing this.

Yeah it's her fault. Awwww the poor guy....

BuffyBot

Monogamy isn't boring, people who can't commit to one person are boring.

There's obviously something lacking in a person that they can't be happy with one person and end up cheating on them numerous times.

Isn't it nice and easy to be so black and white about things.

dub45

Originally posted by builderman
Im a builder from the north who is married. Anyway I'm bisexual but my wife doesnt know. I've went with a few fellas who I work with that are married aswell so it's just a bit on the side. This kinda thing happens a good bit in my line of business. Anyone else at this? I know its wrong but its just a bit of fun.

How would you feel if you found out your wife was doing exactly the same thing?

And as a matter of interest why did you make the post? Are you feeling guilty? or looking for others in the same boat?

Stark

If it's just a bit of fun, why don't you tell her wife? Would breaking her heart be a bit of fun as well?