When to say i love you??

galwaydude

Just wondering when is the right time to say i love you.I was in bed last night and my girlfriend came home after a nightout with her friend, ok she may have been a bit tipsy but she said i love u in some form of words.This kinda stunned me, well didnt really as i do like this girl alot but mmmm love i dont know, then again i have never been truly in love so i dont know what to expect.This aint making any sense and this thread had prob been done before.what to do what to do!!!

Chinafoot

well either u feel it or u dont and to be honest if u were in love with her then you'd know it.

however, to be logical about it. if u think she's going to start the whole saying i love you era of the relationship then you have to think. do u think u could fall in love with her? if u do then i think u should tell her u love her too. it would save u a lot of trouble as she's bound to get paranoid if theres an uncomfortable silence after she says it.

maybe thats not right and u should be honest but thats what i'd do unless i knew i really didnt and wouldnt love them. in that case i'd call it quits cos it wouldnt be fair to either person.

that probably didnt help at all. sorry!

ShriekingSheet

I think sometimes you can really feel like saying it early on in a relationship but you gotta hold yourself back for political reasons - crap and unromantic as that is!!

But if she's the one saying it to you - and you feel it - fcuk political! say it right back!

seamus

Um....you live with this girl, but you don't know if you love her? That's the way your post comes across...

When you know, you know. Chances are she was just saying it because she was drunk. Once alcohol and women get mixed together, use of the word 'love' becomes liberal. She loves everybody. That's not to say that it doesn't mean anything, but it's just something people say when they're drunk. I've lost count of the amount of people I've told that I love them (male and female) when drunk.

galwaydude

i dont live with her, i was just staying at her apartment for the weekend while her flatmat is away.At the moment im just taking things nice and handy as no point in saying i love u if u dont mean it, not fair on the other person so i will say it when i feel ready, god knows when that will be though, could be today or tomorrow or next week or month who knows.Maybe the problem is with me as i have qa few personal issues with myself at the moment which need sorting first.

Rock Climber

Originally posted by seamus

When you know, you know.

Thats so true.
If you're asking the question, it's not what I'd call love at least yet anyway the kind of love that makes you want to stay with someone.
I suppose there are several different scales of love.
I've loved many times, but I guess I've only really been truly in love once.
When I met him, my stomach sank and I went gulp!
We clicked and he was as eager as me and we haven't looked back.
To be honest,I can't imagine what it would be like if he was gone.
It's just magic, it's a deep trust, its something that just gives a continous deep buzz and contantly puts a smile on your face.
Thats heaven

Victor

Originally posted by galwaydude
When to say i love you??

When you love the person. Saying it doesn't make you a bad person.

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

why can nobody think for themselves and find out how they feel on their own anymore?

Sarky

I don't know, what do you think?

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

passive

say it: whenever, its just a damn word.

mean it: when you're sure you feel it.

there's no correct time to say it.... though your girlfriend seems to have the right idea with "when very drunk"

Delphi91

When's the best time to say it?

When you mean it!

Wolfie

Originally posted by Mordeth
why can nobody think for themselves and find out how they feel on their own anymore?

The world got complicated sometime between 1985 and now....

The Sweeper

Just before you cum?

Wolfie

Originally posted by Minesajackdaniels
Just before you cum?

LOL.. thats good.

Typedef

Never say it first, perferably never say it at all.

Women are the enemy... great fun in the sack and at parties... good for the whole washing of your underpants bit....

Just don't get too used to having them around and don't under any circumstances, become so pussy whipped as to tell one you 'love' her.

Alternatively, we could put out an APB on a pair of testicles... last seen, in your bird's pocket!

Typedef

Originally posted by Minesajackdaniels
Just before you cum?

That's shocking.

You need to have used that particular line to remove the knickers to begin with.

Besides... this gag makes it difficult to speak!

Johnny Versace

How long have you been with her?

...

You'll know when to say it because you'll want to say it. There are no rules.

galwaydude

Have been with her 4 months now, going very well in fact.

uberwolf

say it when you feel it, just kinda slipped out when I said it, knew I did, didn't really think it was the right time, early, scared of the response.

Should of seen the smile on her face.


*of course you shouldn't cos of where we were, but you know what I mean

Johnny Versace

Well I know I'd normally be in love by then, and prob would have said it already.

But that's just me...

I think it's pretty normal she kind of wants to say it now.

Originally posted by galwaydude
Have been with her 4 months now, going very well in fact.

ravenhead

Yeah four months is a pretty long enough time to know what your feelings are towards someone.

Is there anything that's making you think that you might never feel that way about her?

Trix

Originally posted by galwaydude
she said i love u in some form of words.This kinda stunned me,

are you sure she was actually saying she loved you. you might be getting your man knickers in a twist about nothing. if you're sure she did then just wait till ur ready. she probably doesn't remember saying it anyway if she was drunk(not saying now she doesn't mean it) so just relax.

Ivan

Simple question. Simple answer.

When you love someone you say I love you. Not before that (except during sex)

God, I'm a cynic.

galwaydude

No nothing has changed, i think i am in love with her but i have my own issues to deal with which sometimes get in the way of the relationship.

tinkerbell

Only say it when you mean it, otherwise tiz gonna bite you in the ass down the line! That kinda word ain't one you should throw around. Wait until you know (you'll just know) and then say it.

Wacker

With me, I found it was more difficult for me NOT to say it than it was to say it coming up to the time before I actually did drop the "L" word.

It just seemed like the most natural thing in the world to say, so I was extra-careful in every conversation. I had been in a situation before where that word ruined a relationship for me. I didn't want that to happen again.

Wacker

Of course, after I did say it, iut got said back to me, which was nice.

Since then, we have over-used it to the pint that it is absolutely meaning-less. That is a common enough occurence, I am led to believe.

rymus

Before I offer an observation I'll add to the thread by saying, Only say it when youre 150% sure you mean it. Otherwise it's just not worth it for the amount of trouble it gets you in..

Now for the observation. This is the most depressing thread I've read all week.

Wolfie

Originally posted by Typedef
Never say it first, perferably never say it at all.

Women are the enemy... great fun in the sack and at parties... good for the whole washing of your underpants bit....

Just don't get too used to having them around and don't under any circumstances, become so pussy whipped as to tell one you 'love' her.

Alternatively, we could put out an APB on a pair of testicles... last seen, in your bird's pocket!

I'm sensing a hostility to women in your posts Typedef. You must let it go. I confess to having misogynistic tendencies myself, but going through life with a hardened exterior is a way of hiding and protecting yourself. You need to free your mind. Let go of the dark side and feel the love brother.

galwaydude

sorry ryymus lol, u can close the thread if ye want as the last thing i want to do is bore all of ireland with my petty problem.Thanx for all the replies thouigh,

Deadwing

Originally posted by Typedef
Never say it first, perferably never say it at all.

Women are the enemy... great fun in the sack and at parties... good for the whole washing of your underpants bit....

Just don't get too used to having them around and don't under any circumstances, become so pussy whipped as to tell one you 'love' her.

Alternatively, we could put out an APB on a pair of testicles... last seen, in your bird's pocket!

BEST. POST. EVER!!!!

KlodaX

Originally posted by galwaydude
Have been with her 4 months now, going very well in fact.

:eek: hold your tounge

if you have to ask .. you shouldn't say it.

he last thing i want to do is bore all of ireland with my petty problem

its call boards.ie for a reason ... we are bored all ready... well I am anyway .. not sure bout the rest :ninja: ?

technically its lying if you don't mean it ... you'll feel weird when the words come out .. like .. 'who said that?' .. and look over your shoulder thinking 'that couldn't have been me!'

rymus

Originally posted by galwaydude
sorry ryymus lol, u can close the thread if ye want as the last thing i want to do is bore all of ireland with my petty problem.Thanx for all the replies thouigh,

Ahh shur I was only taking the self pity thing a bit far. I'm grand now!

As for when to say it though, I'll stand by my previous post and say only when you mean it. Otherwise you'll end up wishing you hadn't opened your gob.

As for myself and the missus, the "say it when you mean it" was within 36 hours of first meeting her. Yes, love at first sight actually exists in this modern dog-eat-dog(biscuit) world.

Best of luck with whatever you decide galwegian fella, I'm sure everything will work out for the best. Life has a funny way of doing that when you least expect it.