A problem

mrbombastic

I know this is gonna sound a bit bizarre, but bare with me.
Last night my girlfriend and her female friends were groping each other like mad, and I didn't like it. Why? Because there were other guys standing around them and I know they were enjoying it...and I actually started to feel sick to my stomach. I tried to explain it to my girlfriend but she just shrugged it off.
She then said that it was funny cause guys have watched them do it before. That got me really pissed. She doesn't understand that I feel really uncomfortable about it, and that she's basically teasing these guys. I know well one day that she'll be doing it and some guy won't take no for an answer.
What the hell should I do?

Dr. Loon

Dump her and get yourself a boyfriend.

moridin

The next time you're both out with a group of friends start groping the guys and see what she says

Banjo013

That would piss me off big-time too.

If she can't understand your feeling on this, or is even unwilling to, just dump her. She'll probably try and make a big deal out of it by saying something like you're adn uptight git or that you're just jealous or something ...

But f**k that - no girl is worth a headache and that's what this is.

Agent Orange

My dear friend, some women need to be struck regularly, like gongs. Your girlfriend is one of these women. Hope this helps.

Gordon

Originally posted by Agent Orange
My dear friend, some women need to be struck regularly, like gongs. Your girlfriend is one of these women. Hope this helps.

If I owned a gong I would probably only strike it once a week after the original thrill of having it.

I'm curious though, Agent Orange - would you talk to her about the problem before you gonged her? Or are you just talking shite?

Doodee

Im just curious as to how far this groping went.
If she was fondling one of her female friends then...ehh...i'd be worried.
If it was only for show then then aint much you can do. Leopards never change their spots, and she will continue to do it when your not around.
Also age can be a factor, if she is rather young then she wants the attention recieved from both yourself and from other men.


If all else fails just go out onto the dance floor, get chatty with some burd, and do like Patrick Swayze in dirty dancing.

"I had, the time of my life..................................."

Dr. Loon

Originally posted by Gordon
If I owned a gong I would probably only strike it once a week after the original thrill of having it.

I'm curious though, Agent Orange - would you talk to her about the problem before you gonged her? Or are you just talking shite?

Gordon... do you really think he's serious?? People are taking things waaay too seriously in here lately. I refer also to the recent suicide thread that was clearly a píss take.

Gordon

The question is not whether or not I or you think that he is serious Dr. Loon.

If you have any more questions please send me a pm.

hedgetrimmer

FWIW, whether this is a troll or not serious is not really of issue in any of these PI threads - others may be experiencing the same thing, or may in the future experience something similar, so any advice offered may be of use to those who read, if not to the original poster.

Also, if it is a genuine post, any negative emails would not, I'd imagine, help the individual(s) with their problem.

Sorry for the OT post, but I think it relevant to reply in order to defend the original post and poster

mrbombastic

Thanks dude. And this is a serious post - I'm really pissed off bout this **** and I asked for some advice, not some bloody pisstakes.

mrbombastic

mrbombastic
please leave the moderating to the moderators
B

Dr. Loon

Sorry Gordon... I'm not questioning your moderating ability. I just think it's obvious Agent Orange is taking the píss.

You should put a load of sticky's at the top;
1) Suicide
2) Jealousy
3) Cheating
4) Spots on penis

etc...etc...etc..

As for original post. Obviously speak to your gf about it. If she doesn't quit it, dump her as she obviously doesn't respect you. Simple really.

mrbombastic

Also, dumping her is seriously out of the question- we've been going out for far too long to break up over something like this. Plus in the past she's put up with a lot of my stuff, so I'm looking for a way to try and get her to tone it down/stop it all together rather than beak up with her.

Dr. Loon

Tell her speak to her!! If she doesn't stop. She doesn't respect you. So don't break up with her and live in misery. They're all the options I can see! Not an option!?!

dudara

Some women seriously don't realise how much their teasing and flirting and semi-lesbos gropings can influence men. With some men, it goes too far leading to sexual assualt, so it's a fine line to tread.

She's a spoken-for woman now, and she needs to remember that. It's fine to flirt still, but you have to remember where to draw the line. If after explaining this to her, she still doesn't realise that, then I wouldn't blame you for leaving her.

Seraphina

Originally posted by mrbombastic
Plus in the past she's put up with a lot of my stuff

she put up with you behaviour, so you put up with hers. simple really.

let her have her fun if she wants, you had it apparently.
*shrug*

mrbombastic

She didn't put up with public behaviour or coming onto women (or men for that matter!) or anything, just personal problems that I had.
Hell I've barely looked at another girl since we've been going out - some of my friends in college think I'm a closet case for fudges sake!

D!ve^Bomb!

Originally posted by Seraphina
she put up with you behaviour, so you put up with hers. simple really.

let her have her fun if she wants, you had it apparently.
*shrug*

this is the stupidest thing i've heard in a long time.. 2 wrongs don't make a right.. if she 'put up with him in the past''(whatever that means) then it was her decision to forgive, that doesn't mean using it against him in the future

Seraphina

whoops. ah well.
stop being so possessive, you dont own her

mrbombastic

It's a good point, but surely if I'm this uncomfortable with it I should at least tell her about it and ask would she mind toning it down a bit, even just when I'm there or sommat.

Beruthiel

Originally posted by mrbombastic
It's a good point, but surely if I'm this uncomfortable with it I should at least tell her about it and ask would she mind toning it down a bit, even just when I'm there or sommat.

if you wish, ask her to tone it down, after that, it's up to her whither she will do so or not, you accept her decision whatever it is, because at the end of the day you take her as she is or find someone who makes you more comfortable.

fitz

If this is something that has only started happening recently, and you've told her you're not happy with it, the reasons why, and she persists...then you need to have a serious chat with her about things, cause that's not showing respect for your feelings.

Relationships should not be tit-for-tat. Just cause you may have been an asshole in the past, doesn't mean she has license to be now.

She either forgave you at the time or didn't, she can't use that as an excuse now.

Kell

Originally posted by Seraphina

stop being so possessive, you dont own her

Methinks mrbombastic is attempting to get his GF to respect his feelings not possess her. And theres another thing. When does the line between doing what you want to and trampling on your better halfs get crossed as it does often.

Relationships are about keeping your intrinsic identity while bearing the feelings of your better half in mind and making judgement calls where needs be i.e. it makes me feel good to do x but should I do it if it fúcks him over? If relationships werent about compromise and everyone did exactly as they liked, no relationship would work.

You cant ask a partner to endure things that pÍss them off indefinitely. People just arent as strong as we would like them to be.

K-

Victor

Originally posted by mrbombastic
What the hell should I do?

The "good" answer is to ask for a threesome

Tell her you consider is as good as cheating. Would she like it if you were doing that to her friend?

Sleepy

If you all just step back from this a second and unlearn the social conventions regarding sexuality in our age: what separates this from her groping guys in a public arena? It's effectively cheating, or at least inappropriate behaviour for someone in a committed relationship, regardless of the sex of the person she's behaving inappropriately with.

Try point it out to her in that way, maybe she'll see the point because I'm sure she wouldn't like to see you groping your friends, whether they be male or female.