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The Gary Neville Diaries!

  • 19-03-2004 10:59am
    #1
    Kone
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,372 ✭✭✭


    Friday
    Put the cones out for Sir today and he glanced at me. Made me feel
    special. He never looks at Phil like that. Told Mum and she said I have to
    share but that's not fair because I got to the cones first. Moustache
    looks a bit thicker today.

    Saturday
    Won today but I didn't play Watched MUTV all night to see whether Sir
    said he missed me. Am sure they edited it out. Hung out with Rio until he
    told me to 'go away innit'. Will tell Sir tomorrow. Deffo not a penalty
    today - gave that girl Boa Morte a nasty stare after the game to let him
    know that I know. Man in wheelchair laughed at my moustache. cried myself
    to sleep.

    Sunday
    Took Sir an apple. But Weasley gave him a bottle of red wine so he'll
    probably play on Tuesday. Creep. Went to Mum's for dinner but she tried to
    make me eat sprouts and then laughed when I banged my fists on the kitchen
    lino. She won't laugh again. Read Sir's book in bed. Coloured in moustache
    with marker. Looks manly.

    Monday
    Rained at training. Marker wasn't permanent.

    Tuesday (early)
    Playing tonight so was definitely worth washing bibs for Sir. Looked at
    papers and I was in them again! Will put in scrapbook. So glad I said
    Porto don't act like men. Am really getting good at this mind games
    business. Photo on back of The Sun made my moustache look thin but Mum
    says it's just the ink. She says I look handsome.

    Tuesday (late)
    Not fair. Not fair. Not fair. It was a goal and we should have won and
    someone pushed me and someone tried to hurt Ronaldo and the girls dived on
    the floor and the referee blew the whistle before we could score and they
    celebrated in front of OUR fans and that made me so angry but I had to go
    and tell the TV that they deserved it (they didn't and I had my fingers
    crossed. Ha!). It's just not fair because we're the best team in the whole
    wide world.

    Have given Philip a Chinese burn for that free-kick and told Sir to
    sell him.

    Wednesday
    Sir not happy today. He didn't even cheer up when I gave him my drawing.
    Wonder if he'll put it on his fridge with the others? Saw a small boy
    laughing at me so held him down until he said that Manchester United were
    the best team in the whole wide world. Feel better now. Bought some
    Re-Gane and put on top lip. Can't wait until the morning to see my bushy,
    manly 'tache.

    Thursday
    Phoned David to ask him to ask Elton about hair transplants. He said he
    was 'too busy preparing for the quarter-finals of the Champions League'.
    Am going to tell Sir and then I'm going to fly to Spain and then hold him
    down until he says that Manchester United are the best team in the whole
    wide world. And I'm going to take back the Man United sovereign ring I
    sent him for Christmas.

    Update: Mum says I can't go to Spain.


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