Nursery Rhymes with a difference

waffles

Mary had a little pig,
she couldnt stop it gruntin,
she took it up the garden path
and kicked the little cu nt in

Mary had a little skirt
with splits right up the sides
and every time that Mary walked
the boys could see her Thighs
Mary had another skirt
twas split right up the front
but she didn't wear that one very often

Simple Simon met a Pieman, going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pieman,
What have you got there?
Said the Pieman unto Simon,
Pies, you twat.

Georgie Porgy pudding and pie.
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too, cause he was gay.

Little Boy Blew.
Hey. He needed the money.

Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard
to fetch her poor dog a bone.
When she bent over
Rover took over,
And gave her a bone of his own

Kazu

got a laugh out of me

Sarky

Mary had a little lamb
That ran into a pylon.
A thousand volts shot up its ass,
And turned its wool to nylon.

Capt'n Midnight

Mary had a little bear
with fur as black as soot
and everywhere that mary went
you could see her bear behind


The once was a man
not spinally erect
an un-poetic opening
but politically correct


johnson, mooney and o'brien
went to bed at half past nine
in the middle of the night
johnson gets up to have a sh1te
...
it must be done, it must be done
so out the window goes his bum
just then a copper passing by
hears a rumbling from the sky
and when he looks up to see the cause
gets it right between the jaws


the night was dark and eyrie
the toilet light was dim
I heard a crash,
and then a splash
Good Grief !
he's fallen in.

SpankyFart

Originally posted by Sarky
Mary had a little lamb
That ran into a pylon.
A thousand volts shot up its ass,
And turned its wool to nylon.

hahaha !!!

Vader

all very good

Töpher

Hehe! I likes em all.

UnrealQueen

Originally posted by Capt'n Midnight

johnson, mooney and o'brien
went to bed at half past nine
in the middle of the night
johnson gets up to have a sh1te
...
it must be done, it must be done
so out the window goes his bum
just then a copper passing by
hears a rumbling from the sky
and when he looks up to see the cause
gets it right between the jaws

Brill, I luv it!!!!!!!!!!!!:D

Mary had a little lamb,
a lobster and some prunes,
a glass of pop, a piece of pie,
a whole plate of macaroons.
She also ate two large cream cakes,
a portion of cod's roe,
and when they carried Mary out
her face was white as snow.

Mary had a little lamb,
you've heard this tale before,
but did you know she passed her plate
and had a little more.

waffles

mary had a little lamb
she kept it in a bucket
she also had a randy dog
who always tried to fu<k it

mary had a little lamb
her father was a butcher
now it goes to school alright
between some bread and butter

Drex

<

---

(see expression)

Dempsey

Originally posted by waffles
Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard
to fetch her poor dog a bone.
When she bent over
Rover took over,
And gave her a bone of his own

Class:D

kmart6

There f**kin brill:D

Capt'n Midnight

When Mary had a little lamb,
the doctor cried and cried
when old McDonald had a farm
the poor lad nearly died.

quank

Originally posted by waffles

Simple Simon met a Pieman, going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pieman,
What have you got there?
Said the Pieman unto Simon,
Pies, you twat.

Georgie Porgy pudding and pie.
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too, cause he was gay.

LOL
excellento:)