Ejaculation Problems

LegacyUser · 07-10-2003 4:39pm #1

I've been having sex for about three years, usually one night stands. My problem is that I have never ejaculated during sex - either oral or vaginal. Everything works fine when I masturbate and I have no problems getting or sustaining an erection its just that I never get to orgasm with a woman.

I now have a really nice girlfriend and I don't want this to get in the way of a healthy sex life. If anyone has a similar experience or ideas about how I can sort this I'd be much obliged.

patch · 07-10-2003 4:42pm

Hmmm...... Have you tried masturbating directly into her mouth?
This might just get you over the mental block.

Beruthiel · 07-10-2003 4:45pm

helpful advice P69 please

azezil · 07-10-2003 4:54pm

Because you can ejaculate when you're alone it would appear to be a psycological problem. do you find that you're not aroused, or even sometimes bored when you're having sex?

Try taking a more active role or asking your partner to do things you know will arouse you.

Victor · 07-10-2003 5:31pm

Isn't it more about the fun than the ejaculation bit? You'll hopefully have more experiences with her and a greating chance of orgasm.

Or try bringing yourself to near orgasm before penetration to get ove rhte mental block, i.e. lower the threshold.

GuanYin · 07-10-2003 5:45pm

Originally posted by azezil
Try taking a more active role or asking your partner to do things you know will arouse you.

Thats probably the only advise of relevence. I doubt its psychological, its just that you know the exact things that work for you because you can gauge the reaction yourself.

She needs to be shown or directed into doing something that better stimulates you. Try both of you talking about what you like and see if you can improve things for both of you.

*Failing that, hire a hooker and have her teach your girlfriend some good tricks in bed. This way your girlfriend will get advice from a professional and you get the added bonus of a threesome.

* Sykeirl recommends that you ignore this option

patch · 07-10-2003 5:52pm

Originally posted by Beruthiel
helpful advice P69 please

Sorry B.

Ok, I had a similar problem when I first started out in the mating game. I was afraid of ending the whole thing too quickly, and so my brain wouldn't let me shoot!

I'd say just relax and enjoy yourself. It's a problem many lads would be delighted to have!

Selik · 07-10-2003 6:17pm

Hmmm....

I've had this problem the odd time but it has only ever really happened when I've either had too much alcohol or substances and/or I really like and care about the lady in question. If I don't care I can pretty much cum whenever I feel like it! I suspect it's purely a psychological problem unless you can't even jerk off in front of her....

As I've said before - " Running the marathon is great in itself but there's nothing quite like crossing the finish line!"

LegacyUser · 07-10-2003 9:22pm

Originally posted by FrustrationFix
I've been having sex for about three years, usually one night stands.

Lovely. STDs can affect performance. Enjoy passing it on.

MojoMaker · 07-10-2003 10:09pm

Originally posted by sykeirl
*Failing that, hire a hooker and have her teach your girlfriend some good tricks in bed. This way your girlfriend will get advice from a professional and you get the added bonus of a threesome

First of all, there is a healthy chance that the poster is a latent homosexual, sorry to voice it.

Secondly, sykeirl, man do you have some growing up to do dude. You reckon hookers are good at sex and have 'tips' to pass on??? Get the leaving cert outta the way before you try to to help the next chap. :eek:

daveg · 08-10-2003 9:19am

Originally posted by patch69
Sorry B.

Ok, I had a similar problem when I first started out in the mating game. I was afraid of ending the whole thing too quickly, and so my brain wouldn't let me shoot!

I'd say just relax and enjoy yourself. It's a problem many lads would be delighted to have!

Patrick I really wished I hadn't read that. I'll never be able to look you in the eye again... although

Originally posted by patch69
Hmmm...... Have you tried masturbating directly into her mouth?
This might just get you over the mental block.

I spurted my coffee all over my monitor when I read that.

daveg · 08-10-2003 9:20am

Originally posted by SeriouslyThough
*snipped* << Fio >>

Thats a bit personal. Were you too much of a chicken to post that under your own username? *snip* is entitled his opinion too.

po0k · 08-10-2003 9:33am

you just gotta find "the groove" in her.
In missionary, try slightly adjust you Angle of Attack, you Thrust Depth and Swivel Angular Velocity.

If all else fails, go with what patch69 said. Bring yourself off in her mouth (after giving her a right pleasuring of course). Make sure you see it too. Should get you over any posisble psycological/"stereotypical catholic Irish" stigma you may have.

Ber, I'm being totally serious here.

If any 14 year old is reading this, don't get caught cranking in front of the PC.
If any 14 year old's parents are reading this, get out the domestos and some J-cloths and get scrubbing. Probably want to replace the keyboard too. And you were wondering why it was all sticky.....

Beruthiel · 08-10-2003 9:45am

Originally posted by SeriouslyThough
*sniiped* << Fio >>

ST - if you are someone who claims to know *snip* and have something to say, have the balls to use your own nickname instead of this cowardly attempt at humour

patch · 08-10-2003 10:17am

Originally posted by daveg
Patrick I really wished I hadn't read that. I'll never be able to look you in the eye again... although

I spurted my coffee all over my monitor when I read that.

You say it like thats the first time you spurted over your monitor!!

GuanYin · 08-10-2003 10:37am

Originally posted by MojoMaker
First of all, there is a healthy chance that the poster is a latent homosexual, sorry to voice it.

Secondly, sykeirl, man do you have some growing up to do dude. You reckon hookers are good at sex and have 'tips' to pass on??? Get the leaving cert outta the way before you try to to help the next chap. :eek:

You seem to have missed the small case text that indicated that this was a joke.

Of course, it probably helped your case in making you look cool and in the know by belittle-ing someone, but really, have a good look at the post and context next time and then you won't come across like such a muppet (although i can't guarentee this).

And if someone was a latent homosexual what would your problem be with that? Are you a homophobe? Jeez, who needs to do the growing up I wonder? :rolleyes:

Beruthiel · 08-10-2003 11:34am

MojoMaker no more baiting other posters please
keep on topic
B

MojoMaker · 08-10-2003 6:52pm

Originally posted by sykeirl
You seem to have missed the small case text that indicated that this was a joke.

Of course, it probably helped your case in making you look cool and in the know by belittle-ing someone, but really, have a good look at the post and context next time and then you won't come across like such a muppet (although i can't guarentee this).

And if someone was a latent homosexual what would your problem be with that? Are you a homophobe? Jeez, who needs to do the growing up I wonder? :rolleyes:

Fair enough if it was a joke, but I think you threw in the hooker comment to, ahem, [sic] "look cool" eh? The last person you would contact to learn anything about sex is a hooker, and that's staying in context.

Where did you get the idea I had a problem with latent homosexuality? I merely voiced an opinion that the poster could be...I think you protest too much. Especially for a young lad. lol.

Protest waaaay too much in fact. Why?

The poster has no problem ejaculating on his own. He has a problem in the company of women. His problem is psychological. Actually problem is probably not the right word, 'issue' is probably better. He might benefit from seeking the advice of a professional rather than a bunch of students, in all fairness.

GuanYin · 08-10-2003 7:23pm

If you actually go up and read the post? you will see what denotes it as a joke. Just because you seem to be having problems, I'll quote it here and underline it....

*Failing that, hire a hooker and have her teach your girlfriend some good tricks in bed. This way your girlfriend will get advice from a professional and you get the added bonus of a threesome.

* Sykeirl recommends that you ignore this option
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

...did that make it easier for you?

Originally posted by MojoMaker The last person you would contact to learn anything about sex is a hooker, and that's staying in context.

I wouldn't know, I've never paid for sex, but I'll bow to your expertise on the matter.

Originally posted by MojoMaker
Where did you get the idea I had a problem with latent homosexuality? I merely voiced an opinion that the poster could be...I think you protest too much. Especially for a young lad. lol.

Protest waaaay too much in fact. Why?

I dunno, something about your posting style. You brought it up and I don't think you did out of courtesy and concern.

Oh, and your suggestions that I am gay are bsed on what? and what exactly am I supposed to do? Cry denial and run to reaffirm my sexuality?

I think you should hush now before the mods spot you trolling. theres a good muppet.

Originally posted by MojoMaker
The poster has no problem ejaculating on his own. He has a problem in the company of women. His problem is psychological. Actually problem is probably not the right word, 'issue' is probably better. He might benefit from seeking the advice of a professional rather than a bunch of students, in all fairness.

Oh for gods sake, he just needs to loosen up with foreplay. And my, aren't we the condescending one. Well, if it makes you feel special......

patch · 09-10-2003 10:35am

Mojomaker, stop being a tit.
PI whilst being a source of advice, remains popular due to the fact that people tend to make replies witty where possible.

This whilst being entertaining, in my view softens the blow of getting advice from strangers.

Get yourself a sense of humour. ww)

Beruthiel · 09-10-2003 11:07am

agreed
now let this be the end of it and back on topic

Kell · 09-10-2003 11:25am

Jeebus- when did people on PI's get so sensitive?? FFS. This is turning into another PTH debacle!!

K- :mad:

po0k · 09-10-2003 11:35am

So, is Harry On The Boat?

Doodee · 09-10-2003 1:10pm

Originally posted by FrustrationFix
I've been having sex for about three years, usually one night stands. My problem is that I have never ejaculated during sex - either oral or vaginal. Everything works fine when I masturbate and I have no problems getting or sustaining an erection its just that I never get to orgasm with a woman.

I now have a really nice girlfriend and I don't want this to get in the way of a healthy sex life. If anyone has a similar experience or ideas about how I can sort this I'd be much obliged.

Are you noticing the Bored look in their eyes?
maybe they aint having as much fun so they aint giving as much
*shrug*

i dunno,just a suggestion.

smiaras · 09-10-2003 8:18pm

This post has been deleted.

tman · 09-10-2003 9:58pm

Originally posted by SyxPak
So, is Harry On The Boat?

harry on the barnett would be a perfectly suitable alternative

pablo21 · 10-10-2003 6:21am

Jesus Girls, cant we all just get along?????

Fry · 10-10-2003 6:48am

Why dont you teach her how to yank your chain ???

po0k · 10-10-2003 2:07pm

because most of em can't do it right.

aodh_rua · 10-10-2003 2:43pm

Originally posted by SyxPak
because most of em can't do it right.

Why is that?

cartman · 10-10-2003 2:51pm

you could be gay but just havnt noticed yet...
Try having sex with azezil..

Big Chief · 10-10-2003 3:03pm

Originally posted by cartman
you could be gay but just havnt noticed yet...
Try having sex with azezil..

that was below the belt...

you just gotta find "the groove" in her.
In missionary, try slightly adjust you Angle of Attack, you Thrust Depth and Swivel Angular Velocity.

first girl i was with i couldnt cum for the life of me, the above is what helped, probably the only good advice ive seen on this thread. To me it dosent seem psycholgical, but then again maybe im basing this on past experiences from my own life.

glad to see you put it in a physics kinda way though syxpak as i was going to try and explain it and i thought 'heh now how the hell do i go about explaing this' i was just going to give up till i read that part of your post

Big Chief · 10-10-2003 3:07pm

Originally posted by MojoMaker

Where did you get the idea I had a problem with latent homosexuality? I merely voiced an opinion that the poster could be...I think you protest too much. Especially for a young lad. lol.

i like people who are presumptious of others, no really...

Didn't i meet you at one of those boards beer things syke? (doyles i think?) didnt seem like a young lad to me.. quite a spot on character if i remember rightly.

Hate presumptious people, taking it a step further and insulting on presumptions just plain down pisses me off though.

Littletinyman · 10-10-2003 3:29pm

Originally posted by Big Chief
that was below the belt...

Which coincidentally is where azezil's brain resides

Mac daddy · 11-10-2003 3:46pm

Originally posted by Littletinyman
Which coincidentally is where azezil's brain resides

LOL

back on topic sorry hear about your problems:D LOL

secret_squirrel · 12-10-2003 12:15am

have you actually thought it might be useful...with a lot of effort men can learn to multiple orgasm..without actually shooting yer lot...all the pleasure...and less mess too

po0k · 12-10-2003 12:38am

Big Chief:
/me bows and apologises for atrocious spelling mistakes.

secret_squirrel:
the film "Go". As an added bonus, has Katie Holmes, some strippers and a threesome. Not to mention some good old violence. And the tantric sex.

xx · 12-10-2003 11:35am

Originally posted by FrustrationFix
I've been having sex for about three years, usually one night stands. My problem is that I have never ejaculated during sex - either oral or vaginal. Everything works fine when I masturbate and I have no problems getting or sustaining an erection its just that I never get to orgasm with a woman.

I now have a really nice girlfriend and I don't want this to get in the way of a healthy sex life. If anyone has a similar experience or ideas about how I can sort this I'd be much obliged.

Maybe you're gay??? Only joking ;-)
I have a theory on this actually. When you're having sex with a girl, does it...erm...feel good? What I mean is, are you getting the sensations that lead to an orgasm? If you're not, then this could be the problem. Same thing happened to me for ages - I'd be having sex with a girl, my erection would be fine, but the sex just wouldn't be 'doing' anything for me. I wouldn't be getting closer to an orgasm and in general just wouldn't feel like climaxing. What I put it down to was that I was afraid of getting the girl pregnant, even when condoms, pills etc. were in use. So I'd be having sex and only going thru the motions basically. I just didn't want to cum anywhere near a girl, but DID actually enjoy having sex. If this sounds like you - then there's good and bad news.
Good news - you can get over it.
Bad news - it takes a while to get over it.
My advice to you is to fool around with the girl for a while before you have sex (no smartar$e comments about foreplay from the girls please!!!). Just get comfortable around her really, and relax so that you feel the 'urge' as it were.
Let me know how you get along.

LegacyUser · 12-10-2003 4:55pm

Originally posted by xx
Maybe you're gay??? Only joking ;-)
I have a theory on this actually. When you're having sex with a girl, does it...erm...feel good? What I mean is, are you getting the sensations that lead to an orgasm? If you're not, then this could be the problem. Same thing happened to me for ages - I'd be having sex with a girl, my erection would be fine, but the sex just wouldn't be 'doing' anything for me. I wouldn't be getting closer to an orgasm and in general just wouldn't feel like climaxing. What I put it down to was that I was afraid of getting the girl pregnant, even when condoms, pills etc. were in use. So I'd be having sex and only going thru the motions basically. I just didn't want to cum anywhere near a girl, but DID actually enjoy having sex. If this sounds like you - then there's good and bad news.
Good news - you can get over it.
Bad news - it takes a while to get over it.
My advice to you is to fool around with the girl for a while before you have sex (no smartar$e comments about foreplay from the girls please!!!). Just get comfortable around her really, and relax so that you feel the 'urge' as it were.
Let me know how you get along.

Thanks xx - that sounds about right. I do enjoy the act, but I never feel like I'm approaching climax. Hopefully it's a matter of relaxing and being comfortable with my partner. Thanks as well to the rest of you - I'll let you know how things go!

Evil Phil · 14-10-2003 10:37am

You've mentioned one night stands so I'm taking it you're not in a relationship. This leads me to believe you masterbating with too tight a fist. STOP LAUGHING, I'm serious. Lay off of a week are two and stop going at it like a man posessed. The subtler things in life are sweeter.

Either that or you like men.

dmd · 16-10-2003 7:20pm

Well, what do you think about when masturbating? Anything? Nothing? copy it.

If that doesn't work, as somebody else said, stop it for a while.

If none of those work then go to the local YMCA.

LegacyUser · 20-10-2003 9:22am

Thanks for all your help guys - you'll be glad to know that I had a wonderful evening with my girlfriend over the weekend where everything worked as it should. I can't tell how much of a relief that was.

Anyways - thanks again.

tman · 20-10-2003 1:12pm

Originally posted by Evil Phil
You've mentioned one night stands so I'm taking it you're not in a relationship. This leads me to believe you masterbating with too tight a fist. STOP LAUGHING, I'm serious. Lay off of a week are two and stop going at it like a man posessed. The subtler things in life are sweeter.

Either that or you like men.

aye, or try switching hands...

/edit
nice wan original poster, give her one from me etc etc...

Ejaculation Problems

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