Ok.......My * Question !

Riker · 04-05-1999 8:36pm #1

Well basically my girlfriend's thingy makes ****ing noises when we....you know. Only in some positions mind you and I heard it's because of small girth, but I'm fine there so I know what's not it. Any suggestions?

-Riker

Riker · 04-05-1999 8:40pm

AAAAAAHHHHHHH!
Fookin censorship!
What's wrong with F@nny and F@rt?

SeP · 05-05-1999 7:58pm

called a Cuif isnt it...hmmm
ive a feeling im not supposed to know this stuff

ooooooooooohhhhhhh myyyyyyyyyhyhyhyhyyyy

n stuff

FreaK_BrutheR · 05-05-1999 11:57pm

I certainly know what I'd be cenbsoring...U sick little man.

LoLth · 06-05-1999 8:18am

[Not nice bit removed by myself because it was unfair to Riker.]

What the **** are you asking a question like this for? I don't know you! I don't know your girlfriend, and now I know more about her than I want to know.

Adra! This topic is embarrassing to his girlfriend and SHOULD be embarrassing to him. I hardly think it fair to allow someone to embarrass a girl like this.

[This message has been edited by LoLth (edited 07-05-99).]

Scarab · 06-05-1999 8:37am

How the hell can she be embarrased???

She most likely doent read this board and most likely no one who reads this board knows her, therefore how the hell can she be embarrased about something she knows nothing about.

If some bloke you never even heard of, in western malaysia, said somehthing about you, which you also never heard how could u possibly be embarrased?

It boggles the mind.

Anways, in answer to the question if you just think about it, when u penetrate there will be a air block up of some sort or something, and then when u relax, there may be a small gap there for the air to release through depending on what position you are in at the time, which may cause the ****ing.

WhiteWashMan · 06-05-1999 6:50pm

well done scarab.... 10 points there

now how i know this doesnt bare thinking about. expcept late at night in bed when you are.. er yaeh whatever

adra · 06-05-1999 7:35pm

heh
well done scarab but um i hate to ask but how do u no this stuff??

riker its a natural thing happens everyone
and its NOT someting to be embarrassed about

more over if ure girlf heard u discussing this here which do u think she would be more ****ed at???

a) u discussing your private stuff ona apublic board( ok its not that public but still)

or

b) the fact that she does it?

um if i was her i no i'd be more ****ed at a
so i hope for your safety she dont find out

Great sex means safe sex - - - - - Never give them your real name and address!

WhiteWashMan · 06-05-1999 9:49pm

adra i hope that you are not condoning promiscurity?
and you a married woman!

adra · 06-05-1999 9:55pm

heh
nearly married ya
see thast y im getting it outta my system now

um does this excuse still work??

LoLth · 07-05-1999 9:29am

I've edited the first reply I made. Took out the narky sarcastic bit which only really went in because I was really ****ed off at the time - shouldn't have taken it out on Riker though.

But I do still stand by the final statement.

Scarab; Maybe I jumped to the wrong conclusion that Riker was Irish. Under that assumption, if Riker meets someone for a pint, or goes to QP or any other LAN meeting etc, and brings along his girlfriend then the people she meets will probably know something very personal about her. Most peeps wouldn't say anything (I hope) but there are always the immature one or two who would make a smart comment or hint at it. Think of how embarrassed you would be if you were in a room where you have no idea which people know what about you - if they know this, might they not know more?. Think of how seriously ****ed off you would be witht he one responsible for letting people know. Probably not angry at the thing they know, as such, but at the fact that something private between two people was aired on a public Bulletin Board, which can be read by all and sundry. But, if Riker is Malaysian, then there's not much chance of meetinghim, is there?

adra; I actually meant embarrassed by the public board bit when I said that it was embarrassing for her (maybe I should have said POTENTIALLY embarrassing??). As for why it would be embarrassing for him, well my point of view is that sex is a private thing. between two people (usually). It is not wrong to talk about sex ('yeah I slept with her. It was great sex' etc. But not detailed, if you really want all your friends to know what exactly it is really like to sleep with her, tell them it's OK to make a pass at her, the lucky ones will find out for themselves!). But detailed discussions, or questions are best asked of either a: a professional (as in doctor , 'sex therapist', or if you feel like it, prostitute) or

b: a close friend. Who you trust to not let the details go any further.

This argument came up before, and I defended the individual's right to ask their question BUT that question was not a breach of trust nor was it potentially harmful to another.

As to the actual question (I suppose I had better be constructive), Both the Girth and the Air answers are correct. Thought he Air reason is the more common of the two, and is a hell of a lot more common than you might think. A third and much rarer reason is either a small cist or laceration, though either of these would involve a lot of pain for the woman during sex, so I'm sure you could rule these out as you would know already.

More detail:

The air reasoning can actually be viewed as a 'good' thing. It is to do with arousal and the enlargening of the Vagina/vulva. Also has to do with the amount of 'lubrication' produced by the female, which again is proportional to arousal.

If it is the Girth, then it is not necessarily a bad thing, all shapes and sizes etc. sometimes you get a 'square pegs and round holes' combination between man and woman (actually , on the basic level that is a horible phrase to use in this). Usually this sorts itself out - don't ask me HOW, I don't understand it properly myself. Anyway, what I was saying was that the Girth could be average, or even above average but the female could be even further above average than that! (make sense??)

J.

Canaboid · 07-05-1999 2:17pm

When did this become the amateur gynaecology board ? Why is this discussion taking place here ?
Just remember - Flatulance is funny, wherever it comes from. Mind u sex is great when you're ****ing yourself laughing(not literally, obviously)

Happens all the time and none of the esoteric conditions suggested above are necessary.

WhiteWashMan · 07-05-1999 4:16pm

and dont knock masturbation.
its sex with sonebody yo ulove

woody allen

Riker · 08-05-1999 11:22pm

Heh
For the record I'm Irish, I've never met anyone I know through Quake in real life and most likely never will. My Girlfriend browses the NET occasionally but the odds of her a) Finding this website and b) Knowing 'Riker' is her boyfriend are IMHO extremely remote.

Anyways, thanks for the advice but I'm thinking of breaking up with her anyway because this is doing my head in and it's never happened with anyone else I've been with before and I think it's just the 'structure' of her thingy.
I'm in college and I plan to enjoy it

Peace and make sure you all go to the new Star Wars film!