Ah is back WICKED, A'ight

Wyverne · 27-08-2000 2:42am #1

lo people

have no fear for joe is now here

i had loadsa trouble, believe it or not the president of ireland herself was at the airport when i arrived home and she told me that i could come into the country.

apparently i was mistaken for an african man, me being so black of late thanks to de 35 degree heat of gran canaria. so when i came home i was sent to customs. the president walked over to me and requested that i leave the country, and i replied..........

"is it cuz ah is black yeah"

and she said yes, she wanted to know how an obviously foreign man obtained an irish passport.. i explained that in the hocus pocus of the late 80's when the whole irish passports for sale business was going on i was merely a toddler and had nothing to do with it.... she of course found this all hard to believe and tried to pin everything on me, even as far as the refugee problem was concerned, saying that i was encouraging all my minions to enter irish soil and live off the wonderful social welfare system....

of course me was gobsmacked at all dis, i never did any of dat........

eventually i almost convinced her i was irish by saying that i had a langer longer than her forearm and i would beat her to death with it if she didnt let me into de country... now i said dis in me bestest dublin accent, so i almost had her convinced... but she was still very reluctant (as are all de wimmmin whenever dey are in my presence) so in de end we both agreed that i would remain in de country under refugee status and i had to check in at de refugee office every day like kinda thing....

so anyway yis can alll wlecome me back now, and um on a more serious note i would genuinely like to get sum comments on the first few chapters on my book, i would really appreciate sum critical (that is to say constructive criticism) comments any of you might have on them if you have time....

thanks people, ahhhh its good to be home

cheers

Joe