Shark Attack

namuras · 30-06-2003 9:35am #1

Shark Attack
> >
> >On a tour of England, the Pope took a couple of days off to visit the north
> >west coast. His 4x4 Pope-Mobile was driving along the golden sands when
> >there was an enormous commotion.
> >
> >They rushed to see what it was and upon approaching the scene the Pope
> >noticed just outside the surf, a hapless man wearing a Manchester United
> >jersey, struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a 20 foot shark!
> >
> >At that moment a speedboat containing three men wearing Leeds tops roared
> >into view. Spontaneously, one of the men took aim at the shark and fired a
> >harpoon into its ribs, immobilising it instantly. The other two reached out
> >and pulled the Manchester United fan from the water and then, using long
> >clubs, beat the shark to death. They bundled the bleeding, semi-conscious
> >man into the speedboat along with the dead shark and prepared for a hasty
> >retreat, when they heard frantic calling from the shore......
> >
> >It was the Pope, summoning them to the beach. Upon reaching land, the Pope
> >went into raptures about the rescue and said, "I give you my blessing for
> >your brave actions. I'd heard there were racist, xenophobic people trying to
> >divide the people of Britain but now I have seen with my own eyes this is
> >not true". "I can see your society is a truly enlightened example of tribal
> >harmony which could serve as a model for other nations."
> >
> >He blessed them all and drove off. As he departed, the harpoonist asked the
> >others, "Who was that?!"
> >
> >"That," one answered, "was his Holiness the Pope. He is in direct contact
> >with God and has access to all God's wisdom." "Well," the harpoonist
> >replied, "he knows f--k all about shark fishing.
> >
> >How's the bait holding up or do we need to get another one?"