My Aussie Housemate

Chinafoot

I am currently living in a 5 bedroom house in Moonee Ponds just outside Melbourne city and one of my housemates is a 23 yr old girl from queensland. now belinda isnt the sharpest tool in the shed and comes out with some classic quotes.

The following are all real quotes...... :

*** "I dont think he's English because he's black" *** (referring
to the handy-man from LONDON)

*** "I dont read no books. Thats disgusting" ***

*** "My dream car of all time is a Holden Commadore" *** (pls note, a Holden is the Australian version of an OPEL and a Commadore is an ASTRA!!!)

*** "Dont your teeth fall out when ur like fifty and get replaced like ur baby teeth do?" ***

*** "If they sent those african ppl some condoms or taught the men how to pull out before they cum then there wouldnt be no more starving" ***

*** "What language do you speak in Ireland Steph? Is it Australian?" ***


and my favourite quote so far........

(this is belinda having a conversation with our housemate Rob who is an ex police officer.)

*** B: "There was somebody watching the house today."
R: "What did he look like? was he caucasian?"
B: "Nah, Australian." ***



Classic or what!!!!

Antisocialiser

rofl dozy git

Raz

Oh you've just got to record some of those conversations
You could make millions

Antisocialiser

Or film her in the shower .... you wouldnt make millions but you would probably culture a serious case of chronic masturbation

vibe666

Originally posted by peachypants
*** "My dream car of all time is a Holden Commadore" *** (pls note, a Holden is the Australian version of an OPEL and a Commadore is an ASTRA!!!)

Doesn't look much like an Astra to me!

it's much more like an Opel Carlton in size, and they do an HSV (Holden Special Vehicles) model that's closer to a Lotus Carlton (although not as good).

It's touring car anyway, but most definatly not an Astra by any means.

Sorry to correct you, she's obviously a ditz, but it's quite a nice car, and very quick off the blocks.

Chinafoot

Originally posted by vibe666


It's touring car anyway, but most definatly not an Astra by any means.

Sorry to correct you, she's obviously a ditz, but it's quite a nice car, and very quick off the blocks.

eh cheers for that mate.....personally i havent seen the commadore as i dont spend my time here looking at cars but a kildare man i lived with told me thats what it was.....(although this is the same guy that legged it with half our rent money!!)

i still think its funny though.

Chinafoot

Originally posted by Antisocialiser
Or film her in the shower .... you wouldnt make millions but you would probably culture a serious case of chronic masturbation

you havent seen this girl!!!! more facial/body hair than the planet of the apes cast put together!!!

my sister has also nicknamed her "mrs potato sack".

Antisocialiser

ROFL TBH.

][cEMAN**

OMFG y'know what would be great - WORLD WIDE BIG BROTHER. Get all the dopiest Big Brother contestants throughout the world to appear together.

You could have your housemate and JADE to begin with.....put up a prize as a £20 gift voucher to Dunnes Stores or something

Antisocialiser

Ya needa get jon in there just for the juxtiposition against the dopey ones

Victor

Originally posted by ][cEMAN**
OMFG y'know what would be great - WORLD WIDE BIG BROTHER. Get all the dopiest Big Brother contestants throughout the world to appear together.

But don't they do that already?

][cEMAN**

As far as I know, so far, it's not intentional. Guess they're just lucky

de5p0i1er

She must have been dropped as a baby or something.

Pugsley

She must have been dropped as a baby or something.

Or quite possable half ape

EdBanger

Why is it that most people assume a Dizzy Girl will be pretty and a pretty Girl will be dizzy?

vibe666

Originally posted by ][cEMAN**
You could have your housemate and JADE to begin with.....put up a prize as a £20 gift voucher to Dunnes Stores or something

Surely you mean Dunnés [phonetically 'Doonays'] Boutique?

My g/f works with a Spanish girl, and couldn't figure out where 'Doonays' was when she was telling her. When she told her where it was, she figured it out and burst out laughing. It's been a standing joke ever since.

RobertFoster

Originally posted by Pugsley
Or quite possable half ape

nah, apes are intelligent

Tyrrial

Originally posted by RobertFoster
nah, apes are intelligent

yeah but how intelligent is half and ape?

the answere: not very. in fact it would be a perticularly stupid ape to have been cut in half in the fist place.