dating housemates

LegacyUser

i'm just wondering what peoples opinions are on getting involved with a person you live with.

i live with a group of friends i've known most of the way through college. i've kissed one of the guys a few times but that was before we finished college and weren't living together

since we all moved into together i've been getting on great with this guy and i know that if he wan't sleeping in the next room that something would have happened weeks ago

i know we probably need to talk about it but i'm still unsure as to whether it would be a good or bad idea to start something

Wook

bad idea, if everything is fine now , leave it , if you need complications go for it.
just remember that you have a bit of privacy now if you desire to have it so, much more difficult when your talking about relationships within the same walls.

patch

Been there, done that. Somebody always gets pissed off/sobers up. Then tension creeps in to the house and fupps the whole lot up.

Unless of course you reckon this a huge chance to find your 'soul-mate' or some such.....

denis

Yeah, unless you think it could be, you know, a 'serious relationship' or summat, it's not worth the risk. Remember, you have to come back to this place every night, and if there's an awkward atmos after it doesn't work out, and all you got was a couple of weeks of regular.. companionship - would it be worth it?

Plus, are you more interested because there's an element of the forbidden about it? If you didn't live together, and everything would be nice and straightforward, would it be as appealing?

Typedef

Do it. Without question, like, oh sure, you thought when you moved into a mixed house that you'd all just be friends.

So now that we have your morality absolved, you can get on with the business of exploiting your friendship, to get your end away.
Carpe Chick.

Beruthiel

Originally posted by Typedef
Carpe Chick.

make sure you have somewhere else to live first!

Borzoi

Go for it and good luck!

Always regret having done something, never having not done something*

*Note the author assumes no liability for you doing stupid things

ferdi

just do it, screw the consaquences, you only live once. you cant just live life nice and safe the whole time, that sucks.

Gordon

Originally posted by Typedef
Carpe Chick.

lol

I have stood by my 'ethics' and always been unhappy with the results. There are many stories I could recount to you but at the end of the day my philosophy is that if you really really want to be closer to somebody - you should at least try.

The shear (how do you spell shear?) annoyance and frustration that you get later on in life through the knowledge that if you had done something - you would have been successful in finding happiness through a relationship is quite quite annoying.

I would only dis-advise this if you simply want to rock his body for one night. If you want to rock his spirit for an undetermined amount of time - go for it, please go for it. Be happy and make someone happy and you'll make me happy.

/edit - are you a male or female original poster?


oops Merc caught me out just like he said he would do on the for sale feedback thread!

Mercury_Tilt

This post has been deleted.

smiles

Go for it if you want to, my best mate at college started going out with the lad who lives next door (as in there's 4 foot between out front doors!) and now he spends the majority of his time in with us. it's grand.

<< Fio >>

mavedic

I'd say go for it as well. You've nothing much to lose. At the worst things won't work out and it will be a bit awkward around the house for a while. As long as you're relatively mature about it you should be friends again in no time, and moving on to your neighbours! And if it works out - well it works out.

The Sweeper

Originally posted by smiles
...and now he spends the majority of his time in with us.

Either you guys live in a hall of residence, or that relationship is WELL open.

smiles

Originally posted by Minesajackdaniels
Either you guys live in a hall of residence, or that relationship is WELL open.

heh. We live in a house which has 4 flats. He sleeps (occasionally) in his room in his flat, other than that he cooks, eats, watches TV, etc. in our flat

<< Fio >>

LegacyUser

thanks for the opinions! i'm female if that makes any difference.

i think it could be an actual relationship its not the whole forbidden thing attraching me. we've always gotten on really well and there was a bit of kissing going on last year.

was at a party last night and was having a great time with this guy but was getting fairly drunk and i didnt want to score him while we were both drunk that wouldn't be a good start to something.

so ended up staying with a mate and not going back to the house and really regret it now. party on in our house tomorrow night i think it could be time for some talking about the situation

mooman_00

Originally posted by wondering
i think it could be time for some talking about the situation

since your going for it,
fuk talking, take your clothes off and lead him to bed he'll appreciate that more................

denis

Originally posted by mooman_00
since your going for it,
fuk talking, take your clothes off and lead him to bed he'll appreciate that more................

Have to agree here. If you've decided to take the plunge anyway - then, seriously, fukc the "lets talk about how this will make us feel" shi.te and just get down to it.

LegacyUser

thanks for the advice

i thought it would be a really bad idea to just jump the poor lad, i'm looking for a relationship here not just a convenient fcuk buddy!

came home from work late last night and everyone had gone to bed cept him, he waited up for me!

not to go into details, but we talked, it didn't involve stripping and i'm very happy now. de only problem now is the slagging we'll be getting from the other in the house!

Typedef

Originally posted by wondering
thanks for the advice

i thought it would be a really bad idea to just jump the poor lad, i'm looking for a relationship here not just a convenient fcuk buddy!

came home from work late last night and everyone had gone to bed cept him, he waited up for me!

not to go into details, but we talked, it didn't involve stripping and i'm very happy now. de only problem now is the slagging we'll be getting from the other in the house!

You know, sometimes, it's better to let relationships develop, then to try and define what they will be at the start.

I mean seriously, you can't just expect the guy to propose...... or commit to anything... before you have done something ... simple like, say, umm, snuggle.

Maybe you expect too much too soon... and instead of stressing him out (before you even get to relationship stage) you should snuggle with him and find out if you two are compatible.... before you get his & hers matching epitaphs.

LegacyUser

i'm not looking for a proposal, i just didnt want to start anything unless it was possibly going somewhere.

it would be a really bad idea to have a casual realtionship with him when we're both living together.

we both know there is something between us, there was plenty of kissing going on last year and we're good friends. we decided to take things slowly for the time being

Typedef

Originally posted by wondering
i'm not looking for a proposal

Yup , just, it seems commitment , predicated on a snog.

LegacyUser

there is a bit more to the whole relationship than that
both of us want this but were hesitant cos of the the living together thing.

i'm not some psycho who kisses a guy and thinks they're married

The Corinthian

Originally posted by wondering
i'm not some psycho who kisses a guy and thinks they're married

Heaven forbid :rolleyes:

I just hope he doesn’t have pets. Or you a pressure cooker...

LegacyUser

you know thats what i can do tonight!

was planning on cooking us dinner, got the house to ourselves for a change