Would you sleep with some one with a scar after an operation?

LegacyUser

I am a single guy - more often celibate than not - split with 2 previous girlfriends and do not do one night stands.I am seeing someone again and it is now approaching sleeping together time.Only problem is I had an operation a couple of years ago and have a pretty nasty scar about 10 " long across my stomach. It has healed well but it is still fairly evident. I don't know if I should tell her in advance or how to beginning to broach the subject. On the other hand I don't want her to find out at the last second and to have it come as a shock. Any advice? If you are a woman how would it put you off someone?

Marksie

Someone i know has a scar of similar length across her stomach due to an op before keyhole surgery. It doesn't make the slightest bit of difference.

Anyone who is with you will not bother in the slightest. But if you are nervous or worried, just talk to her

CathyMoran

My husband has a big scar on his stomach due to surgery. He did tell me about it before hand and it was never a big deal (though he hates me kissing it). Life is strange and I ended up having massive surgery recently - I have a huge scar on my tummy, at my neck and on my shoulder blade as well as other smaller scars. My husband reassured me that these were signs of strength not weakness and I recently went swimming in a bickini with all my scars on show, no-one even took a second glance.

In terms of bringing it up, I would just explain that I had a scar from surgery but not make a big deal out of it (it is not a big deal after all).

aria-bella

I have a scar and most people i know have scars .. If you are stressed about it and feel that it will take from the enjoyment then broach it beforehand in a casual way, But imo if she is a typical woman she will be worried about you seeing her naked too and thats all part of the fun of it !

She will see it, register it, and if she is worth her salt will move on. Dont be worrying, Personally i think scars on men are very sexy

LoL at the question and no offence meant to the asker but it is a thing of nothing.

I too have a scar down my stomach since I was 5 and had an operation.

A lot of people find those kind of things sexy actually

Saruman

Sounds to me Wondering that YOU have the issue here and you need to sort it out yourself.
As others have said, its very unlikely this girl will care at all.. You yourself are concious about it for some reason just like CathyMoran's Husband is.
If i were you i would take your shirt off and say "hey check this out " Wear it like a badge of honor.. in fact tell her you had a fight with a shark and you won (though the shark got a few digs in obviously).
This is obviously rubbish but it will break the ice and it might even turn her on... Some women like scars on men. Makes them more manly and all that.

I myself have a little scar on my moob When i was a year old (was walking at 7 months, poor parents they had a tough job!) i climbed up on the counter and pulled a cup of hot tea down on myself. Been scalded ever since. It has never bothered me and im all too eager to show people and tell them how it happened.

boffin

Op I know how you feel - I have a five inch long with scar on my lower back from an operation and I was very consious of it at first particularily with my first partner - but funnily now I have forgotten about it and only remember about it if someone touches it! Most partners since although I say it to them they don't bat an eyelied and most forget about it until I mention it and then it reminds them. Honestly I know it might seem like an issue but it really isn't. And in terms of seeing it on a partner - it wouldn't bother me at all!!

Macca07

have a scar around my rib cage to upper back, no previous partners have had a problem with it, most found it sexy, had explained prior about it and had shown them before sleeping together

greenkittie

Scars = sexy

kaalgat

My boyfriend has a huge scar on his belly, about 7cm across. It never bothered me one bit.

Don't worry about it

Slow Motion

Chicks dig scars !

Seriously though I have one from my bellybutton to my sternum and about 1cm wide and it has never been a problem, quite the opposite in fact !

gandalf

Unless you were covered in cotton wool from birth you will have scars of one sort or another. Its part of who you are, your life story. Be proud of it, if you feel it will put her off tell her about it, how it happened (maybe embelish it a bit ).

Be happy with who you are (feck it I am turning into a hippy!).

bolliwoodi

my bf has scares on his face from when he was attacked by a dog

on his stomach from surgery

on his legs

i love them

they are the marks of life

jdivision

Scars on back and legs, girls tend to be curious about them rather than anything negative

BoozyBabe

Would you want to sleep with your wife / partner etc, after she's had a c-section having your baby?

(Hope you're saying yes!!!)

Scars wouldn't bother me in the slightest. They're just part of the life story that is you, just like the wrinkles on your face.

Don't worry about it & I don't think I'd bother telling her. She'd be a very strange person if she had a problem with it. I'd be curious in the story of how you got it when I saw your scar, but I certainly would not want to jump off you in horror!

watsgone

Tristrame wrote:

A lot of people find those kind of things sexy actually

Glad to hear that, I got a large one on my stomach

John Mason

my ex was stabbed trying to break you a fight, so he had a big scar on his chest, it didnt bother me in the slightest, it was a bit of a shock when said he was stabbed in a knife fight though but i wouldnt worry about it. bring it up by saying "so have you any interesting scar stories" or something like that

JohnCleary

Scars are cool

Rb

JohnCleary wrote:

Scars are cool

And make interesting dicussion pieces. Also, if you can roll your stomach or something, it could be a good party piece. Regardless, you've nothing to worry about.

doubtfir3

I have a lot of scars - my whole left arm is pretty mangled from the armpit to my elbow with a huge skin-graft, and als more scars on my shoulder and arm on the left.

My right arm has a big one by my elbow and my chest and leg also all after an accident about 7 years ago.. plus I have some bald patches on the back of my head..

To be honest I was quite self-conscious about them at first but have only had one bad reaction from a woman.. and she wasn't worth it..

As others have said its all about how you see the scar.. I personally believe mine to be a (very important) part of my history and while not exactly "proud" of them I will readily present them as part of my identity.

Think of the scar as something positive.. it is a result of something which was wrong in/on your body and is now fixed. It is part of you history and something of which you should be proud.

... just my 2 cents

azezil

Mines bigger than yours

I've a scar along my left side, from below my rib cage to the top, I've slept with a few people over the years *cough*, and its never been an issue!

Tar.Aldarion

As said, don't worry OP. I've never ran into somebody that cared and I have scars on my penis, from the war.

neuro-praxis

This is a really positive thread!

I have lots of scars from surgeries and my husband loves them all. He's clean as a whistle but covered in moles, which I love!

You have nothing to worry about. Seriously.

bennyx_o

I've the remains of a skin graft on the inside of my right arm after a car crash almost a year ago. TBH, when it first happened I used to think it'd be the end of the world, but it's not all that noticable. Like another posrter said, wear it like a badge of honour.

LegacyUser

Hey All,

slightly off topic but I was looking for some feedback on a problem I'm having.
I'm a 25 year old male with badish acne and acne scars on my chest and back.
Would that put women off? anyone have any experience with this?
I'm really paranoid about them

Thanks

louisecm

If she is worth sleeping with she won't care.

spurious

Generally speaking, once people get close enough to see mine, the scars are the last thing they're thinking of.

I can't understand anyone who would have a problem with scars, or acne, or uneven breast size, or bendy penises, inny or outy belly buttons or even pubes shaved into the shape of Mike Tyson's head.

There are other way more interesting things to be bothered about when you get that far.

Victor

I think the advice to broach it casually will put your fears at ease.

Now one of the hottest women I've met (big swimmer, nice pert boobies) lost her legs below the knee in an accident, but I have a cruel "story" to tell. I think it was a friend of one of the guys from college, but he went home with some "burd" after a night out. Everything is going grand and they head for the bedroom and she takes off her prosthetic leg. Not expecting it (and I'm sure alcohol was involved), he freaks out and runs off.

Mentioning (but no need to discuss at length) the scar would most likely prevent this.

Consider renting out Lethal Weapon 3 for the scar comparision scene between Mel Gibson and Rene Russo.

Wash. Repeat.

tumbleweeds

Personally, I'd find a scar interesting rather than repulsive. Besides, lots of women have Caesarean scars, people get them from their line of work etc. Nothing to worry about.

LegacyUser

Thanks to everyone for your replies - seem to be 100% positive that I have nothing to worry about. I will try to broach the subject. To be honest I find nothing turns me off more than those (men & women) who want to tell me all about their illnesses and operations.
Thank God I am in perfect health and have no ongoing health issues but didn't want it to come as a surprise.
Looking forward to the night - I know it is going to be soon

dudara

I had open heart surgery when I was 10 and the scar runs down my breastbone to the bottom of the ribcage. There are also two smaller scars on either side from the bypass machine. I am now 28.

I don't even know I have the scar. I look in the mirror and I don't see it.

I'm here because of that scar. Many other posters here on boards are grateful that they have scars rather than other worse outcomes.

Don't be conscious about it. Good luck.

darkskol

I have the same scar on my stomach as Will ferrell (famous by association:D )
As it has already been said "Chicks dig scars!" - my girlfriend loves mine and is always trying to show it off to her friends.

seahorse

Wondering wrote:

If you are a woman how would it put you off someone?

Not in the slightest. I have numerous birthmarks from childbirth and if a man felt "put off" by them I'd tell him to f-off! They're my war wounds of motherhood and I'm proud of them.

I'm sure I'm repeating other people as I only read the first post, but seriously, scars are not a turn off in 99% of cases, and the only time they are is when they are particular evident and running straight across a persons face. Honestly, you've nothing to worry about.

Dave!

I want a scar........

DapperGent

One of the sexiest girls I ever met had a huge big scar. Damn she was sexy.