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Heineken Sales Down As Dickheads Migrate To Craft Beers

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    #32
    Diabhal Beag
    Closed Accounts Posts: 15,238 ✭✭✭✭Diabhal Beag


    WW is made for Joe.ie readers looking for a laugh


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    #33
    Eutow
    Registered Users Posts: 1,197 ✭✭✭Eutow


    The state of the pint on the left in that picture.


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    #34
    Fratton Fred
    Closed Accounts Posts: 26,567 ✭✭✭✭Fratton Fred


    Why would someone drink a German craft ale to look cool? This country is knocking out some great beers at the moment.

    Metalman is my current go to beer, or O'Hara's pale ale. Both gorgeous.


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    #35
    donvito99
    Registered Users Posts: 5,818 ✭✭✭donvito99


    Recently switched from lager to Smithwick's. B-e-a-utiful.


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    #36
    yipeeeee
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,605 ✭✭✭yipeeeee


    donvito99 wrote: »
    Recently switched from lager to Smithwick's. B-e-a-utiful.

    Only downside is its 3.8%.


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    #37
    CentimoSal
    Registered Users Posts: 25 ✭CentimoSal


    I know Waterford Whisper is troll bait - but if this was a real headline - dickheads would probably be replaced with Hipsters...

    Let's say Heineken's sales are dropping - they can just do a few popup brands and compete with the craftbeer brands. I'm certain they can adapt to new market trends, if they're not doing that already?


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    #38
    Gamayun
    Registered Users Posts: 448 ✭✭Gamayun


    Banjo String wrote: »
    Switched from lager to ale a good few years ago

    Coopers sparklin ale is a must try for anyone not yet had the pleasure.
    O'Haras pale and red are seriously good Stuff too.

    Picked one of these up from the off license 'Almost expired' bin today for €1 to try. Mainly because it was 5.8 %, which seemed like good value for €1 even if I don't like it *cough,* *not an alcoholic* *cough*

    Also picked up a Sri Lankan (!) stout called Lion from there, 8.8 %. It intrigued me, you know, Sri Lanka, stout, lions, that whole connection there.


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    #39
    Son Of A Vidic
    Registered Users Posts: 32,370 ✭✭✭✭Son Of A Vidic


    Sir Osis of Liver. wrote: »
    Heineken,beer of the Gods.

    Looking at your username, I'm guessing it hasn't done much for your liver.


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    #40
    Value Hunter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 337 ✭✭Value Hunter


    How will you know if someone drinks craft beers?


    Don't worry, they'll tell you


    They'll f**king tell you


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    #41
    First Up
    Registered Users Posts: 14,822 ✭✭✭✭First Up


    Fratton Fred wrote: »
    Why would someone drink a German craft ale to look cool? This country is knocking out some great beers at the moment.

    Metalman is my current go to beer, or O'Hara's pale ale. Both gorgeous.

    The craft beer revolution here is a bit like the Campaign for Real Ale in Britain (back in the 1970's) which was a revolt against fizzy crap such as the likes of Watneys Red Barrel and Double Diamond that was forced on the public through the "tied houses" pub ownership system. Beer drinking in Britain today is light years better and it was started by a bunch of sandal wearing, bearded architects who said enough is enough and took on the big boys.
    I enjoy Waterford Whisper but in this case, I'm backing the dickheads.


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    #42
    MRnotlob606
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,642 ✭✭✭MRnotlob606


    It's nice to see the emergence of Craft beards, Why I've grown mine since last winter and its down to my bollócks now


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    #43
    inforfun
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 20,862 Mod ✭✭✭✭inforfun


    "Real" Heineken is fine.
    The 4,2% version you buy here however.... tastes like nothing.


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    #44
    humbert
    Registered Users Posts: 5,238 ✭✭✭humbert


    All I'll say is that they're a far superior drink to meths. The wankers on the street don't drink them because they can't afford them.


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    #45
    dr.bollocko
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 35,943 Mod ✭✭✭✭dr.bollocko


    I get spending money on wine. Or whiskey. But every craft beer I've tried was just unpleasant after a few sips.


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    #46
    Sprog 4
    Registered Users Posts: 434 ✭✭Sprog 4


    The One Doctor wrote: »
    To be fair, Heineken is piss, warm or cold. My default is O'Hara's Ale.



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    #47
    catallus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,106 ✭✭✭catallus


    Beer is a tool of the food manufacturers. It is there to make you hungry.


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    #48
    Banjo String
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,380 ✭✭✭✭Banjo String


    yipeeeee wrote: »
    Only downside is its 3.8%.

    Try pale ale or summer ale (smithwicks) both 4.5%. Both pretty decent tipples imo.


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    #49
    major deegan
    Registered Users Posts: 220 ✭✭major deegan


    Migrate to any bottled beer rather than drink the warm flat ****e draft they'd horse out to you and charge €5 for it !!


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    #50
    Iranoutofideas
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,083 ✭✭✭Iranoutofideas


    It seem like the new thing to "hate on" is Craft Beer and people that like it.

    However I have yet to drink with anyone who talks about it endlessly like some people would have you believe. You might get someone suggesting you try a certain beer and say they prefer the taste. Do people get this irate about people that suggest you try a new food?

    As for dickheads - the only dickheads I've come across in relation to craft beer are the ones who scoff at it as they prefer to down 12 pints of Heineken or Budweiser. Which is easier to do with low strength bland beer. These are the same types that like to brag about how many pints they had last night with the lads and had no hangover.

    I had rather enjoy a craft beer on my own than suffer listening to gob****es like that.


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    #51
    Links234
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,944 ✭✭✭✭Links234


    First Up wrote: »
    I enjoy Waterford Whisper but in this case, I'm backing the dickheads.

    Ah come on now, I'm a big fan of cask ale, this whole craft beer thing is nothing but good news all round, but we can have a bit of a laugh about it too ;)


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    #52
    First Up
    Registered Users Posts: 14,822 ✭✭✭✭First Up


    Links234 wrote: »
    Ah come on now, I'm a big fan of cask ale, this whole craft beer thing is nothing but good news all round, but we can have a bit of a laugh about it too ;)

    Absolutely. But there are people in this forum who seem to be taking it seriously.


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    #53
    Links234
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,944 ✭✭✭✭Links234


    First Up wrote: »
    Absolutely. But there are people in this forum who seem to be taking it seriously.

    Then point and laugh


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    #54
    Chancer3001
    Registered Users Posts: 5,480 ✭✭✭Chancer3001


    Craft beers are ****e.

    If they were any good there be a huge demand for them and they'd be mass produced.


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    #55
    yipeeeee
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,605 ✭✭✭yipeeeee


    I think its the word craft that irritates me when I hear **** going on about it.


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    #56
    Captain Chaos
    Registered Users Posts: 11,174 ✭✭✭✭Captain Chaos


    Chancer3001 wrote: »
    Craft beers are ****e.

    and they'd be mass produced.

    If they were then they wouldn't be classed as craft beers. It's in the name.

    Hogs Back is a nice craft beer, better than most of the other crafts imo.


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    #57
    For Forks Sake
    Registered Users Posts: 11,482 ✭✭✭✭For Forks Sake


    yipeeeee wrote: »
    I think its the word craft that irritates me when I hear **** going on about it.

    Right so, Artisan Beer it is, just to keep you quiet.






    I f*cking hate the term artisan applied to food.


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    #58
    Beaner1
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 819 ✭✭✭Beaner1


    I prefer cask ales.


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    #59
    Eutow
    Registered Users Posts: 1,197 ✭✭✭Eutow


    Chancer3001 wrote: »
    Craft beers are ****e.

    If they were any good there be a huge demand for them and they'd be mass produced.


    Mass produced lagers are sh**te.

    If they were any good they wouldn't have to be frozen to be almost drinkable.


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    #60
    McChubbin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,080 ✭✭✭McChubbin


    Urgh, Heineken. Tastes like flat, vaguely beer-flavored water to me.
    I loves me craft beers, that I do, but I try not to be a snob about it. Everyone has different tastes to be fair.
    As a matter of interest, I've got a fondness for Wynchwood Brewarie's stuff. Black Wych is my favorite. :D Mmm. Caramel porter. NOM.


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    #61
    BrokenHero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 113 ✭✭BrokenHero


    Craft beer is horrible piss usually brewed by over privileged daddy's boys and drank by their overbearing mates.

    Even the **** on the site wouldn't drink that stuff, it's worse than meths.


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