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Anxiety and/or depression discussion.

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    #2702
    Hugo Stiglitz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    SoSheSaid wrote: »
    I'm not sure anyone ever is truly happy, at least not all of the time. People are always left wanting, because we always want so much. The goalpost always moves; first it's simply to have one good day, then it's to have a good week, then it's to start making plans... And that's not a bad thing, it's called ambition and I guess it's also called hope.

    I often look at people who seem to have their **** sorted, with no MH issues or any of that to contend with either, and sometimes I think 'it's not fair'. But then I remember I've no idea what's going on with them, just like so many people have no idea what's going on with me. I'm sure there are a few who think I've my sh1t together, mainly people I haven't seen in years, and that's just the art of perception.

    Hope things ease up for you soon though, even for a day or two of respite.

    Well said SSS.


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    #2703
    SoSheSaid
    Registered Users Posts: 28 ✭SoSheSaid


    Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »
    Well said SSS.

    Well hey, I've a nickname already :)


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    #2704
    cookie24
    Registered Users Posts: 317 ✭✭cookie24


    Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »
    Heya Cookie,

    Am glad to hear that you're feeling good there. :)

    Is tomorrow another interview or something different?

    another one of those recovery meetings. If I get a job soon I will have alot of interaction with clients so its fairly imperative I sort out the public speaking issue.
    I was doing alot of self-analysis, and came to the conclusion its my blushing that is the root cause of all my anxiety. At some stage when I was a kid (dont remember exact scenario) I blushed and was laughed at and then felt ashamed. Now anytime I blush I panic and go into that vicious circle thing.
    So anytime all eyes are on me I blush and then anxiety. Or fear that I will blush which also leads to anxiety.
    Having said that....inhale the positivity, exhale the negativity.


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    #2705
    Hugo Stiglitz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    cookie24 wrote: »
    another one of those recovery meetings. If I get a job soon I will have alot of interaction with clients so its fairly imperative I sort out the public speaking issue.
    I was doing alot of self-analysis, and came to the conclusion its my blushing that is the root cause of all my anxiety. At some stage when I was a kid (dont remember exact scenario) I blushed and was laughed at and then felt ashamed. Now anytime I blush I panic and go into that vicious circle thing.
    So anytime all eyes are on me I blush and then anxiety. Or fear that I will blush which also leads to anxiety.
    Having said that....inhale the positivity, exhale the negativity.

    The vicious circles are the worst. Fair play for doing all of that self-analysis, I hate to take a deep look at myself and the problems in case I don't like what I see. Hope you get a good handle of the public speaking so. :)


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    #2706
    downonthefarm
    Registered Users Posts: 1,308 ✭✭✭downonthefarm


    Yeah the anxiety is a curse for sure. But just try and relax and think rationally.
    What's the worst that can happen? People laugh at you so what eff them
    More times than not they wont take in half the things you say anyway.


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    #2707
    downonthefarm
    Registered Users Posts: 1,308 ✭✭✭downonthefarm


    SoSheSaid wrote: »
    I'm not sure anyone ever is truly happy, at least not all of the time. People are always left wanting, because we always want so much. The goalpost always moves; first it's simply to have one good day, then it's to have a good week, then it's to start making plans... And that's not a bad thing, it's called ambition and I guess it's also called hope.

    I often look at people who seem to have their **** sorted, with no MH issues or any of that to contend with either, and sometimes I think 'it's not fair'. But then I remember I've no idea what's going on with them, just lik so many people have no idea what's going on with me. I'm sure there are a few who think I've my sh1t together, mainly people I haven't seen in years, and that's just the art of perception.

    Hope things ease up for you soon though, even for a day or two of respite.

    Thank you s³.what is this self harm thing we do when we get down?
    Some people drink or drugs .others eat or steal.the mind is such a mysterious thing indeed


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    #2708
    SoSheSaid
    Registered Users Posts: 28 ✭SoSheSaid


    downonthefarm wrote: »
    Thank you s³.what is this self harm thing we do when we get down?
    Some people drink or drugs .others eat or steal.the mind is such a mysterious thing indeed

    I guess all of those things are just other forms of self harm, just not as obvious. Some people destroy their lives instead of their bodies...and some people do both :(


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    #2709
    loveisdivine
    Registered Users Posts: 2,463 ✭✭✭loveisdivine


    cookie24 wrote: »
    I'm good....had 2 interviews today so keeping fingers crossed. Actually feeling quite good typing here. Another meeting tomorrow evening and then a w/e of alcohol.
    It'll be good for a while, and I'm gonna try to remain somewhat level headed. Time will tell though. I tell myself I drink at home cos its cheaper, rather than go in sober and straight onto pints. Truth is I dont want/cant go in sober cos of anxiety.
    And you? How are you this cold Wed evening? How'd the call with therapist go?

    I actually calmed right down today and didn't need to call her in the end. I have my normal appointment tomorrow though so not long to wait.

    There was a bit of a breakthrough with the marriage issue last night after we'd had such a bad day so I'm feeling more positive now and its like a weight has been lifted.


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    #2710
    downonthefarm
    Registered Users Posts: 1,308 ✭✭✭downonthefarm


    SoSheSaid wrote: »
    I guess all of those things are just other forms of self harm, just not as obvious. Some people destroy their lives instead of their bodies...and some people do both :(

    8ve done them all unfortunately at some stage. Not good.lost friends and sacrificed career oppertunities.


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    #2711
    Hugo Stiglitz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    downonthefarm wrote: »
    8ve done them all unfortunately at some stage. Not good.lost friends and sacrificed career oppertunities.

    Same here. I became really reclusive and time went by.


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    #2712
    SoSheSaid
    Registered Users Posts: 28 ✭SoSheSaid


    downonthefarm wrote: »
    8ve done them all unfortunately at some stage. Not good.lost friends and sacrificed career oppertunities.

    Right there with you, but sometimes I try to look at it another way - in that, the friends who were REALLY friends stuck by me and the career ops just weren't right for me at the time. I have to, or I'd go crazy(er).


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    #2713
    cookie24
    Registered Users Posts: 317 ✭✭cookie24


    I partake in some very mild self harm..even calling it that doesn't sound right. I bite off little bits if my tongue (sounds disgusting) and have near mutilated my finger nails. Simply cant pick them anymore so I use a scalpel :(
    Sorry for the pretty heavy post


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    #2714
    downonthefarm
    Registered Users Posts: 1,308 ✭✭✭downonthefarm


    Its okay cookie I have the occasional blowout myself.


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    #2715
    Hugo Stiglitz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    loveisdivine wrote: »
    I actually calmed right down today and didn't need to call her in the end. I have my normal appointment tomorrow though so not long to wait.

    There was a bit of a breakthrough with the marriage issue last night after we'd had such a bad day so I'm feeling more positive now and its like a weight has been lifted.

    That's great to hear LID! :)


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    #2716
    Gongoozler
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,263 ✭✭✭Gongoozler


    cookie24 wrote: »
    another one of those recovery meetings. If I get a job soon I will have alot of interaction with clients so its fairly imperative I sort out the public speaking issue.
    I was doing alot of self-analysis, and came to the conclusion its my blushing that is the root cause of all my anxiety. At some stage when I was a kid (dont remember exact scenario) I blushed and was laughed at and then felt ashamed. Now anytime I blush I panic and go into that vicious circle thing.
    So anytime all eyes are on me I blush and then anxiety. Or fear that I will blush which also leads to anxiety.
    Having said that....inhale the positivity, exhale the negativity.

    I blush all the time at work. I'm getting to hate it. If I'm at a meeting and I need to say something, I still will but I go red straight away. In fairness in that situation it's everyone turned around to listen to what you're saying, it can be an anxious situation for many. But it's carried over now to where if I have someone come to my desk to talk to me, if it's for a long time, I'll go red too. I suppose for me it's nervousness. I seem to mess up my words fairly regularly, even when I'm not nervous, so I suppose it's that hanging in the back of my mind.

    Thinking about it now, it probably happens way more than it used to. And more than I realised.


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    #2717
    handbagmad
    Closed Accounts Posts: 650 ✭✭✭handbagmad


    Going to doc tomorrow. Mood has dipped considerably.
    Really hope there's no major meds change.
    Or maybe I just need a chat n support.

    My poor GP


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    #2718
    Hugo Stiglitz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    handbagmad wrote: »
    Going to doc tomorrow. Mood has dipped considerably.
    Really hope there's no major meds change.
    Or maybe I just need a chat n support.

    My poor GP

    Sorry to hear that H. *hugs*


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    #2719
    CZ 453
    Registered Users Posts: 1,728 ✭✭✭CZ 453


    What is your biggest fear? Is it linked in any way to your anxiety?


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    #2720
    handbagmad
    Closed Accounts Posts: 650 ✭✭✭handbagmad


    CZ 453 wrote: »
    What is your biggest fear? Is it linked in any way to your anxiety?

    My biggest fear/s are shamefully what other people think or their perception of me. As I don't 'fit in'

    I never have done from school to the working, I always felt different therefore I feel I was judged and treated different. I find it very hard to conversate with people I dont know even people I do know at times. Lack of social skills.

    My anxiety now is I feel rooted to this. Dread having to go anywhere out of the norm. Even to the local shop, I plan times and a route where I'll be less likely to meet someone.

    For ever since I can remember I've had one good friend...FOOD!!!!!!
    It's comfort, yet after eating huge amounts I feel horrible , disgusting.
    Food is the friend and enemy.
    The vicious cycle.

    There's a point in all that somewhere i think!
    Or im just ranting again


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    #2721
    itsnotmyname
    Registered Users Posts: 206 ✭✭itsnotmyname


    Hb .....its not unusual , particularly for the girls among us, to turn to food , when we're up, down, or on the level....its the "friend" that's always there to comfort us :pac:!...
    Worrying about that is for another day.....
    Best of luck with your gp visit ....I know I build these things up in my mind , and it never turns out as bad .
    Best wishes :)


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    #2722
    cookie24
    Registered Users Posts: 317 ✭✭cookie24


    handbagmad wrote: »
    My biggest fear/s are shamefully what other people think or their perception of me. As I don't 'fit in'

    I never have done from school to the working, I always felt different therefore I feel I was judged and treated different. I find it very hard to conversate with people I dont know even people I do know at times. Lack of social skills.

    My anxiety now is I feel rooted to this. Dread having to go anywhere out of the norm. Even to the local shop, I plan times and a route where I'll be less likely to meet someone.

    For ever since I can remember I've had one good friend...FOOD!!!!!!
    It's comfort, yet after eating huge amounts I feel horrible , disgusting.
    Food is the friend and enemy.
    The vicious cycle.

    There's a point in all that somewhere i think!
    Or im just ranting again

    I can relate to most of this. Always think people are judging me and worried what their perception of me is. This sense of being judged leads to blushing which leads to anxiety and then more blushing and on we go.
    Conversations are also hard for me. Even talking to 1 friend and the cycle can start. If I could just shut down the inner voice telling me I'm being judged.
    I plan out my shopping as well. I do it early in the morning where I will not bump into anyone and it is generally quieter. Same with travel. Hate getting the Luas when its busy.
    And food....sometimes I will wake up at 2am and order a take away. Have the delivery man ring me and pass the food through the window so housemates aren't aware of my shameful habit of comfort eating in the middle of the night.:(:o

    Still trying to stay positive though :p


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    #2723
    loveisdivine
    Registered Users Posts: 2,463 ✭✭✭loveisdivine


    Work is quiet today and I'm already bored. Its bad because I end up with too much time on my hands to think!


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    #2724
    Hugo Stiglitz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    itsnotmyname wrote: »
    Hb .....its not unusual , particularly for the girls among us, to turn to food , when we're up, down, or on the level....its the "friend" that's always there to comfort us :pac:!...

    I comfort eat almost constantly. And I have the body to prove it. :(:o
    loveisdivine wrote: »
    Work is quiet today and I'm already bored. Its bad because I end up with too much time on my hands to think!

    I'm finding my recent boredom is bad for making me overthink things too much. Trying to keep busy but there's only so much distraction one can make.


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    #2725
    greenfrogs
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,115 ✭✭✭greenfrogs


    handbagmad wrote: »
    My biggest fear/s are shamefully what other people think or their perception of me. As I don't 'fit in'

    I never have done from school to the working, I always felt different therefore I feel I was judged and treated different. I find it very hard to conversate with people I dont know even people I do know at times. Lack of social skills.

    My anxiety now is I feel rooted to this. Dread having to go anywhere out of the norm. Even to the local shop, I plan times and a route where I'll be less likely to meet someone.

    For ever since I can remember I've had one good friend...FOOD!!!!!!
    It's comfort, yet after eating huge amounts I feel horrible , disgusting.
    Food is the friend and enemy.
    The vicious cycle.

    There's a point in all that somewhere i think!
    Or im just ranting again

    I can relate to most of this. I feel different to others too. I have had a varied work life. It would be considered a failure by many. I look at my schoolmates and they have 6+ years working full-time, have lived in different places, travelled. I haven't done any of this. I just feel like a failure. I was let go in my previous job and this consistently goes through my mind. I have to deal with others knowing this which makes me feel even worse.
    I am very unsocialable as well. Try to avoid social situations and small talk as much as possible. I am becoming slowly better though (I think).
    Overeating is also an issue. I try not to eat junk food. But find it quite difficult. I find if I am having a bad day I tend to binge eat in evenings so I something to look forward to. I feel disgusting after it as well. It's a never ending cycle


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    #2726
    Hugo Stiglitz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    greenfrogs wrote: »
    I can relate to most of this. I feel different to others too. I have had a varied work life. It would be considered a failure by many. I look at my schoolmates and they have 6+ years working full-time, have lived in different places, travelled. I haven't done any of this. I just feel like a failure. I was let go in my previous job and this consistently goes through my mind. I have to deal with others knowing this which makes me feel even worse.
    I am very unsocialable as well. Try to avoid social situations and small talk as much as possible. I am becoming slowly better though (I think).
    Overeating is also an issue. I try not to eat junk food. But find it quite difficult. I find if I am having a bad day I tend to binge eat in evenings so I something to look forward to. I feel disgusting after it as well. It's a never ending cycle

    I hear ya GF. I tend to constantly compare my own life to others. Mine never looks good in comparison at all.


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    #2727
    TrustedApple
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,678 ✭✭✭TrustedApple


    Housemate again was trying to stress me out witch coming in twice turning of the light while i was trying to eat my dinner

    Also all my missing post showed up today in the post box witch is even odd that i got 3 parcels from amazon all with different send dates on them and old retro game also showed up today

    So strange how everything shows up at the same time ?


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    #2728
    Roquentin
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,130 ✭✭✭Roquentin


    franklindroosevelt109480.jpg


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    #2729
    Hugo Stiglitz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    samapple789 wrote: »
    Housemate again was trying to stress me out witch coming in twice turning of the light while i was trying to eat my dinner

    Also all my missing post showed up today in the post box witch is even odd that i got 3 parcels from amazon all with different send dates on them and old retro game also showed up today

    So strange how everything shows up at the same time ?

    Could just be the post guys doing it all on the one trip maybe.

    What game did you get? :)


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    #2730
    CZ 453
    Registered Users Posts: 1,728 ✭✭✭CZ 453


    samapple789 wrote: »
    Housemate again was trying to stress me out witch coming in twice turning of the light while i was trying to eat my dinner

    Also all my missing post showed up today in the post box witch is even odd that i got 3 parcels from amazon all with different send dates on them and old retro game also showed up today

    So strange how everything shows up at the same time ?

    What console do you have? or is it a pc?


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    #2731
    TrustedApple
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,678 ✭✭✭TrustedApple


    Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »
    Could just be the post guys doing it all on the one trip maybe.

    What game did you get? :)

    2 copies of halo master chief collection as i got on to amazon there at the start of the week as my copy never showed so i now have 2 copys. Thats for the Xbox one

    Also assassin's creed unity for the PS4.

    Then a old game for the nokia n gage

    Cant wait to be playing some halo now this weekend :).


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