How many sexual partners have you had so far?

Well I'll post what I've been saying for the past while now on here, and I have no problem saying it again.

Embarresingly I'm a male virgin, was a bit weird teenager and I became a social recluse. I suffered a lot bullying in England before I came here at 14 so "closed up" by avoiding people incase I looked weak and that I wasn't exploited. It was a defense mechanism to avoid being bullied being a recluse.

I didn't think I was good enough for society anyway as I believed nobody wanted me so I didn't go out. I felt I was doing society a favour by avoiding people. I believed the world hated me.

I've developed a self hatred for myself since my teenage years, I felt I was a failure and have allowed it to manifest and I attempted suicide a few months back because I felt I was a social freak/failure at 25.

Part of the reason also was because I believed I was going to be like this for the rest of my life so thought if I was ending my life I would doing me and my family a favour.

I've had counselling for the first time in my life recently since, on anti-depressants, and now have appointments with psycologists.

I hate bringing about a depressing post to this thread, but its these sort of topics and conversations which have bothered me over the years I have to admit. Obviously I feel like a total twit for being a virgin at 25 near 26. But I was painfully shy in my teens and early 20s, plus I had no confidence so have naturally fallen into this position.

I've seen some threads about women not dating virgin blokes after 30 etc and has upset me obviously. I worry that I'm almost too old to have a girlfriend for the first time now as when you're in my position it becomes weird to be like this at my age. I feel like a loser obviously.