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Should I run or stay for sex

24567

Comments

  • #52
    CB19Kevo
    Registered Users Posts: 800 ✭✭✭CB19Kevo


    On the off chance this is not a windup,You clearly are a idiot.
    Oh yeah sounds like a great plan to have sex with a lady you know little about who wants to mutilate her ex and his girlfriend because she was dumped.. What could possibly go wrong:rolleyes:


  • #53
    syklops
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,966 ✭✭✭✭syklops


    El Weirdo wrote: »
    First thing's first.

    Do you own a pet rabbit?

    Or a saucepan.


  • #54
    Chucken
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,459 ✭✭✭Chucken


    Who fancies an impromptu beers in Mallow Friday night?


  • #55
    nullzero
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,443 ✭✭✭✭nullzero
    °°°°°


    Go for it OP. Some way to lose your virginity.

    Glazers Out!



  • #56
    syklops
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,966 ✭✭✭✭syklops


    Chucken wrote: »
    Who fancies an impromptu beers in Mallow Friday night?

    At the trainstation all wearing t-shirts that say "Don't meet that crazy psycho from tinder!".

    Half the station will think the t-shirts refer to them.


  • #57
    131spanner
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,305 ✭✭✭131spanner


    Rule 15: Never stick your dick in crazy.


  • #58
    Candy_Girl
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 474 ✭✭Candy_Girl


    Remember to bring some protection OP....you know like a stun gun or something :D


  • #59
    Daniel S
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,533 ✭✭✭Daniel S


    131spanner wrote: »
    Rule 15: Never stick your dick in crazy.

    I'm curious to what the other rules are. Care to enlighten? :pac:


  • #60
    Chucken
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,459 ✭✭✭Chucken


    Daniel S wrote: »
    I'm curious to what the other rules are. Care to enlighten? :pac:

    Well it seems number 131 involves a spanner :eek:


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  • #61
    syklops
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,966 ✭✭✭✭syklops


    Daniel S wrote: »
    I'm curious to what the other rules are. Care to enlighten? :pac:

    Subscribe to his newsletter. It will be quicker.


  • #62
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    Daniel S wrote: »
    I'm curious to what the other rules are. Care to enlighten? :pac:

    Rule number 1: Don't stick your dick in a blender.

    To be honest there's a lot of things you shouldn't stick your dick in before crazy. That's why crazy is number 15 on the list.


  • #63
    syklops
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,966 ✭✭✭✭syklops


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    Rule number 1: Don't stick your dick in a blender.

    To be honest there's a lot of things you shouldn't stick your dick in before crazy. That's why crazy is number 15 on the list.

    And in crazys sister is number 16.


  • #64
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    syklops wrote: »
    And in crazys sister is number 16.

    Crazy's Sister is actually beautiful and very well balanced.

    Unfortunately she's going out with Insecure's Brother and they're mad about each other so nobody but him has a chance with her.


  • #65
    Talib Fiasco
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,428 ✭✭✭Talib Fiasco


    Ask her when is she going to let you clap dem cheekz and/or piitb. If she responds in any way other than blocking you then you'd be foolish not to try and get something off her :pac:


  • #66
    131spanner
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,305 ✭✭✭131spanner


    Daniel S wrote: »
    I'm curious to what the other rules are. Care to enlighten? :pac:

    I was gonna start at 15 and work my way down to 1.

    Open to suggestions... :pac:


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  • #67
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    Trelstor wrote: »
    Nonsense, when a woman is ovulating all bets are off.

    You sound like someone who has definitely talked to at least three women in your life.

    Enlighten us with your wisdom oh enlightened one.


  • #68
    Chucken
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,459 ✭✭✭Chucken


    Trelstor wrote: »
    Of course fair peasant, when a woman is ovulating she will fukc the right men if the opportunity presents itself.

    Sweet. Jesus.


  • #69
    Royal Legend
    Registered Users Posts: 2,655 ✭✭✭Royal Legend


    Tell her revenge sex is the best thing, anal, then cum all over her tits, on camera off course ;)












    will probably get banned for that one :(


  • #70
    Reindeer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,079 ✭✭✭Reindeer


    pablomakaveli wrote: »
    Dont stick your dick in crazy. Its not worth it in the long run.

    That rules out 99% of women, tho...


  • #71
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    Trelstor wrote: »
    Of course fair peasant, when a woman is ovulating she will fukc the right men if the opportunity presents itself.

    And I hope you really enjoy it when you finally do manage to find one that who will do it with you.


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  • #72
    syklops
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,966 ✭✭✭✭syklops


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    You sound like someone who has definitely talked to at least three women in your life.

    Enlighten us with your wisdom oh enlightened one.

    Are we including his Ma in there?


  • #73
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    syklops wrote: »
    Are we including his Ma in there?

    Yes. And potentially two of his four sisters.


  • #74
    corner of hells
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,409 ✭✭✭corner of hells


    OP , thats clearly one of Scissors sisters on day release you hooked up with.


  • #75
    syklops
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,966 ✭✭✭✭syklops


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    Yes. And potentially two of his foul sisters.

    FYP.


  • #76
    LizzieJones
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,459 ✭✭✭LizzieJones


    Trelstor wrote: »
    when a woman is ovulating she will fukc the right men if the opportunity presents itself.

    And sometimes the wrong men too.


  • #77
    Legion.
    Registered Users Posts: 401 ✭✭Legion.


    With any luck you'll get her pregnant and we'll have a merry old time.


  • #78
    toastedpickles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,607 ✭✭✭toastedpickles


    As a wise man once said

    Back away not today disco lady!


  • #79
    Esel
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,507 ✭✭✭✭Esel


    Don't waste your money on a return ticket.

    Not your ornery onager



  • #80
    skimpydoo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,959 ✭✭✭skimpydoo


    They wrote a song about her


  • #81
    Potatoeman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,368 ✭✭✭Potatoeman


    Reindeer wrote: »
    That rules out 99% of women, tho...

    Of course its not you..


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  • #82
    syklops
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,966 ✭✭✭✭syklops


    corner of hells wrote: »
    OP , thats clearly one of Scissors sisters on day release you hooked up with.

    Actually the mother of the scissor sisters is due out on, erm, Thursday. :eek:


  • #83
    Drakares
    Registered Users Posts: 904 ✭✭✭Drakares




  • #84
    Macavity.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,745 ✭✭✭Macavity.


    She's obviously trolling. Sometimes on nights out my friends and I will swap phones and fuck with each other's Tinder. It's absolutely hilarious.


  • #85
    ibarelycare
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 58,456 ✭✭✭✭ibarelycare


    The worst thing about that message exchange is "His loss hun my gain hopefully"....CRINGE!


  • #86
    Dial Hard
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,920 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard


    She sounds like a barely-literate Morello from OITNB.


  • #87
    bear1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,824 ✭✭✭✭bear1


    Is her name Jennifer by any chance?
    I will subscribe to this as I believe this could be useful to the investigation come saturday morning.
    btw OP, I believe I speak for all of us when I saw we would like to have an update to how it all went (if you survive of course) on the saturday morning.


  • #88
    Irishcrx
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,861 ✭✭✭Irishcrx


    Back away not today disco lady!!!


  • #89
    Feisar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,703 ✭✭✭Feisar


    First things first:

    Rule 1 - Never put your penis where you wouldn't put your tongue.

    Now to the matter at hand, sound advice would be cut contact asap. Then again I rarely follow my own good advice and ended up dealing with crazy from time to time in the past.

    Also try remember she's a person with feelings. Don't lead her on with hints of a relationship, fúck the ****e out of her and then fúck off with yourself afterwards.

    (Reply based on OP post being legit)

    First they came for the socialists...



  • #90
    dar100
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,735 ✭✭✭dar100


    I'm hoping you added her on the Facebook first. Refusal is always a good indication.

    Also, have you spoke on the phone yet?


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  • #91
    Irishcrx
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,861 ✭✭✭Irishcrx


    **** it though , worth a shot if she's a looker and only up for a ride.

    She will call out her ex's name during it by the sounds of it though , so leave your pride at home..hopefully it's only his name though and you leave with your penis intact..


  • #92
    eamonnq
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,012 ✭✭✭eamonnq


    ibarelycare wrote: »
    The worst thing about that message exchange is "His loss hun my gain hopefully"....CRINGE!

    That's a very thoughtful and incisive post.






    Am I doing it right?? :D


  • #93
    Milly33
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,657 ✭✭✭Milly33


    Jaysus Christ pay for sex don't go near the nutter..


  • #94
    DLMA23
    Closed Accounts Posts: 296 ✭✭DLMA23


    Bunny boiler, be afraid, be very afraid


  • #95
    RoboRat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,559 ✭✭✭RoboRat


    Personally, and I speak from experience, nothing is worth the crazy, you may think it is, but trust me it isn't.

    If you do decide to go down that road, and it seems you have, I can give you a way out young padawan. The only way to get away from crazy is to be crazy so you will need to be crazier than her. My advice, be a little bit edgy before the deed and once you are done, then go all out and start ranting absolute madness... the more insane the better - start with talking about Voodoo and scientology... they are good solid topics, moving into conspiracy theories and then all out alien abduction and probing or satanism. Hysterical laughing is always a good prop as well as a good dose of crying if required.


  • #96
    I Heart Internet
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,678 ✭✭✭I Heart Internet


    RoboRat wrote: »
    Personally, and I speak from experience, nothing is worth the crazy, you may think it is, but trust me it isn't.

    If you do decide to go down that road, and it seems you have, I can give you a way out young padawan. The only way to get away from crazy is to be crazy so you will need to be crazier than her. My advice, be a little bit edgy before the deed and once you are done, then go all out and start ranting absolute madness... the more insane the better - start with talking about Voodoo and scientology... they are good solid topics, moving into conspiracy theories and then all out alien abduction and probing or satanism. Hysterical laughing is always a good prop as well as a good dose of crying if required.

    Yep. Things are 'bout to get crazy down in Mallow this weekend.





    (Crazy sexy!!!!)


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  • #97
    FTA69
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,252 ✭✭✭FTA69


    There's so much sh*t advice in this thread! typical overtly cautious naysayer b*llocks. A hot woman wants to ride the sh*t out of you, full stop. Right so she's a crazy lunatic, oddball, big deal. Bate the hoop off her solid. Worst case scenario you'll have a funny story for the lads.

    TLDR - shoot the load and hit the road.


  • #98
    lukesmom
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    FTA69 wrote: »
    There's so much sh*t advice in this thread! typical overtly cautious naysayer b*llocks. A hot woman wants to ride the sh*t out of you, full stop. Right so she's a crazy lunatic, oddball, big deal. Bate the hoop off her solid. Worst case scenario you'll have a funny story for the lads.

    TLDR - shoot the load and hit the road.


    Best advice and post by a country mile.


  • #99
    kiffer
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,097 ✭✭✭kiffer


    Never promise crazy a baby...
    oh? You don't remember saying "yeah baby, what ever." at 2 am whilst pissed? Do you remember not saying it?
    Well now she knows were you live and used a bump key to get into your house and rolled around in your dirty laundry...
    Then she rang her ex and told him that you said you'd beat him up for what he did to her...

    I doubt she's murderously crazy.


  • #100
    anncoates
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,925 ✭✭✭✭anncoates


    I'm actually glad I was single before all of this stuff

    As for the girl it's your duty to save her ex and become the sole focus of her psychopathic rage.


  • #101
    MRnotlob606
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,642 ✭✭✭MRnotlob606


    Jesus it will be like copulating a doberman, OP bring a hocky mask.


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