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Asking guests not to post wedding photos on social media - thoughts?

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    #92
    mrsbyrne
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,228 ✭✭✭mrsbyrne


    irish_goat wrote: »
    If a bride or groom told me not to put wedding photos on Facebook I'd probably just make an album they can't see and put them up anyway.

    .....because obviously even though its their wedding day not yours and your a "cherished" trusted friend/family member , you know your rights and entitlements and you'll show them who's boss?


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    #93
    Toots
    Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,905 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    irish_goat wrote: »
    If a bride or groom told me not to put wedding photos on Facebook I'd probably just make an album they can't see and put them up anyway.

    Why would you do that? Odds are on that someone who sees them would know the bride and groom and could very well mention it to them. Whatever about if they'd asked you not to post them and you just stuck up a few anyway, but if you deliberately went out of your way to go behind their backs I'd imagine they'd be pretty hurt/angry.


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    #94
    BabysCoffee
    Registered Users Posts: 4,712 ✭✭✭BabysCoffee


    Is it pics of themselves that the bride and groom generally don't want posted by others on FB? I think that is fair enough.


    But do they have the right to object against someone putting a pic of themselves and other guests at dinner in the reception for example?
    Personally I think that is a step to far and possibly an indicator of an over controlling bride and groom


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    #95
    rainbowtrout
    Registered Users Posts: 15,381 ✭✭✭✭rainbowtrout


    BabysCoffee wrote: »
    Is it pics of themselves that the bride and groom generally don't want posted by others on FB? I think that is fair enough.


    But do they have the right to object against someone putting a pic of themselves and other guests at dinner in the reception for example?
    Personally I think that is a step to far and possibly an indicator of an over controlling bride and groom

    In my experience its pics of the bride and groom they don't want up there. If the guests want to take pics of each other and post them online fire ahead.


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    #96
    Gatica
    Registered Users Posts: 3,300 ✭✭✭Gatica


    twowheelsonly wrote: »
    I think all future bride/grooms should read this.....

    http://petapixel.com/2013/05/15/guest-photographers-or-why-you-should-have-an-unplugged-wedding/

    I think that article really makes you think about photography at a wedding as a guest. I think all guests should read it...
    skippy15 wrote: »
    We got married recently and and set up a "Wedding Party App",
    It's an app that lets you post wedding details and directions etc: then during the wedding people can add photo's and comments to it.
    You are the overall admin and it can only be seen by wedding guests. Was nice because people posted a lot nice photos of reception first dance etc:
    We put a little note in the mass booklet and it seen to work out

    What a wonderful idea! I've recommended to lots of friends now :)


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    #97
    stinkle
    Registered Users Posts: 1,159 ✭✭✭stinkle


    Wedding party App sounds like a great compromise - it's not ruffling any feathers but its keeping pics private. We were at a wedding recently (family wedding) and some had set up a WhatsApp group which worked for planning stuff and meant photos could be shared. It was great cos a few people couldnt make it, and were in the loop. I love taking pics on my camera, but am not one for camera phones or uploading them so the group was a bit wasted on me, but it definitely removed the "facebook effect" from that wedding. I once put up pics on fb *after* a mates wedding (and with her permission!) but only certain guests could see them as it was a private album - so that can be done too. I've definitely been guilty of trying to get nice pics in the past - stuff like bride+dad walking her down the aisle (esp friends that are known to my parents for example, as my mam loves to see the proud parents!) but would never put em on fb for all to see either. No doubt the same friends will be trying to get those same pics of me too!

    I kinda dont want ceremony pics put up and really dont want anyone getting in the photographer's way as the room is small! Best man isnt on fb and would have no problem announcing it beforehand! I'm thinking get him to say it and draw the attention to the booklet which has a link to the app might work well?

    I dont see that banning photosharing outright would go down well - I'm thinking family group pics and friend reunions and even funny ones minus bridal party as the night progresses are all gonna happen! Also, I'll probably be dying to see pics once it's all over!


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    #98
    Larbre34
    Registered Users Posts: 23,854 ✭✭✭✭Larbre34


    Im surprised at people getting so uppity about this, "Im paying so much to go to this gig, ill do what I like"

    Ive been at two or three weddings where everyone was asked not to post stuff, and I didnt even bat an eyelid. The event belongs to the couple, they are damn well paying enough for control over the quality of the photography, as well as for your dinner and possibly accommodation, if youre not enough of a grown up or dont respect your friends or family enough that you cant adhere to a courteous request, then stay away.

    For me it would be on the same level as people asking others not to post pics of their kids in third party pictures without approval, and who would dream of violating that? Well probably some folk would, but that would be the same ignorant types who dont respect others generally.


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    #99
    Mrs OBumble
    Registered Users Posts: 25,738 ✭✭✭✭Mrs OBumble


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Personally, as a photographer myself, ...

    A quick question for you: does your standard wedding cotnract allow couples to print additional copies of your photos, and to upload them to social media?

    I know that years ago, wedding photo contracts at home said that the photograpy studio had sole reproduction rights - and I've had photo stores refuse to make copies for me on this basis.

    Of course changing technologies has meant that this stranglehold is no longer effective.

    But it occurred to me to wonder how contracts are done now.



    Also, fyi, if the ceremony includes any music that is still copyright (either the lyrics, tune or an arragement), then recording it, even for personal use, is possibly y illegal. People who do so are very unlikely to be prosecuted - but it's worth pointing out in terms of respect for the law.


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    #100
    lazygal
    Registered Users Posts: 12,644 ✭✭✭✭lazygal


    Mrs OBumble wrote: »
    A quick question for you: does your standard wedding cotnract allow couples to print additional copies of your photos, and to upload them to social media?

    I know that years ago, wedding photo contracts at home said that the photograpy studio had sole reproduction rights - and I've had photo stores refuse to make copies for me on this basis.

    Of course changing technologies has meant that this stranglehold is no longer effective.

    But it occurred to me to wonder how contracts are done now.



    Also, fyi, if the ceremony includes any music that is still copyright (either the lyrics, tune or an arragement), then recording it, even for personal use, is possibly y illegal. People who do so are very unlikely to be prosecuted - but it's worth pointing out in terms of respect for the law.
    We have full rights to our professional wedding photos. We've printed photos and books ourselves. We ruled out any who kept the rights.


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    #101
    ABajaninCork
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,411 ✭✭✭ABajaninCork


    lazygal wrote: »
    We have full rights to our professional wedding photos. We've printed photos and books ourselves. We ruled out any who kept the rights.

    Although the photographer gave us all the negatives, and printed the photos/albums for us, we still held all rights to his work. We also ruled out any photographers who held rights to the pictures.


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    #102
    lazygal
    Registered Users Posts: 12,644 ✭✭✭✭lazygal


    ABajaninCork wrote: »
    Although the photographer gave us all the negatives, and printed the photos/albums for us, we still held all rights to his work. We also ruled out any photographers who held rights to the pictures.

    We got amazing prints and our main album from our photographer, but did parents albums and pictures for relatives ourselves. The quality of the photographer stuff was far better than photobox or snapfish I must admit. I still can't believe some photographers hold all the rights and charge a fortune for prints.


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    #103
    ABajaninCork
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,411 ✭✭✭ABajaninCork


    We did the parents albums ourselves. Got a lovely photo printer with some of the wedding money, so we did it with that. Cheaper too!

    The photographer also gave us a disk, so some of the photos were made into an online album (Picasa), and the link sent to all my friends and family who didn't come over for the wedding. Oh - and some were also posted on to Facebook!


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    #104
    SamAK
    Registered Users Posts: 1,094 ✭✭✭SamAK


    Facebook is Bloating our Egos. Also Sky is Blue. Grass is Green.


    "How do we curate our lives online? How honest are we about our lives on social media? Facebook profiles and postings often seem relentlessly upbeat. We create an avatar of our lives, an avatar who is slimmer, has more friends, a better love life and a better job than we do"



    http://www.clickonline.com/tech/facebook-is-bloating-our-egos-also-sky-is-blue-grass-is-green/22694/#sthash.TFm90gqy.dpuf


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    #105
    ABajaninCork
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,411 ✭✭✭ABajaninCork


    I use Facebook for keeping up with friends and family at home and in Barbados. I find it useful. I set my privacy high, and don't post the minutiae of my life. And I only add people who are actually KNOWN to me!!


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    #106
    Toots
    Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,905 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    I know when I got married our photographer gave us two disks of photos, one set were the highest resolution ones that were to be used when ordering prints, but he also gave us a disk with the exact same photos only a bit lower res specifically so that they could be added as an email attachment or posted on FB/Twitter etc.


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    #107
    Fionn
    Registered Users Posts: 2,368 ✭✭✭Fionn


    All the mobile phones,tablets compacts etc. make a shambles out of most weddings, with harsh lighting from flashes and poor video especially in low light thats only suitable to view on a small screen.
    Unfortunately thats the way technology is now! You can take a photograph and instantly upload it to the web. But just because you can, doesn't mean you must!
    People just cant contain themselves, years ago we just had one or two uncle bob types, now everyone in the congregation is uncle bob! and determined to blow out the highlights, produce blurry grainy images and wobbly seasick inducing video.
    :rolleyes:

    yeah the unplugged wedding is the way to go. Last one i was at as a guest, i had no camera and i left my phone turned off, happy days. :)


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    #108
    MY CUP OF TEA
    Registered Users Posts: 43 ✭MY CUP OF TEA


    The problem I have found with brides is that they dont want these pics before the big day BUT the day after, the blues set in, youre still trying to cling to the wedding day buzz and suddenly you are desperate to see pics...especially when you think about how long its going to take to get the professional photos back!

    I work as a type of wedding photographer..not the professional photos, im like the "hired guest" and take the photos your friends would take, infiltrating the crowd...basically being that annoying person ;) a few of my brides have asked their guest to not take/put up pics on facebook and im telling ya, the day after the wedding, its not really an issue... I always have their candid album for them the next morning and they have the soft copy for their facebook and stuff. AND as sure as eggs are eggs..they will still want their friends crappy pics!!!

    As a bride, you will prob never look more fantastic so no harm in showing the world ;)


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    #109
    sahara24
    Registered Users Posts: 22 ✭sahara24


    I am engaged and my future husband absolutely hates social media and I personally don't want photos on Facebook of my wedding day...I would have invited all my friends Facebook friends if I wanted them to share in my day. My OH was best man at a wedding last week so I took a few photos of him, the groom and the other groomsman...he used my phone to take pictures of the bride and groom dancing,cutting the cake etc...I would never post these on Facebook unless they asked me to (for example if they had a wedding day Facebook album). But I have no problem with guests posting photos of themselves or even the venue, but I do not want to be in any of them or my OH. People are very naive to the fact that once you post a photo online you no longer own it...anyone in the world can use those photos for their own use. Enjoy the day, stop worrying about your 'Facebook friends' and advertising what an exciting life you lead. Long winded way of saying I agree completely and think it should be mentioned on the day...before the ceremony is a good idea


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    #110
    username123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,484 ✭✭✭username123


    sahara24 wrote: »
    People are very naive to the fact that once you post a photo online you no longer own it...anyone in the world can use those photos for their own use.

    Bit off topic, but what exactly would you be worried about your image being used for?

    I mean, anytime I go out in public I could be photographed and the image used for something that I didnt give permission for?

    So what if some random person in China or somewhere uses an image of me to advertise his hair salon or whatever - Id probably never know about it anyway.


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    #111
    mrsbyrne
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,228 ✭✭✭mrsbyrne


    username123 wrote: »
    Bit off topic, but what exactly would you be worried about your image being used for?

    I mean, anytime I go out in public I could be photographed and the image used for something that I didnt give permission for?

    So what if some random person in China or somewhere uses an image of me to advertise his hair salon or whatever - Id probably never know about it anyway.
    I think this is straying away from the topic in question.
    Look nobody is saying that people cant take pics at a wedding. People have always taken snaps at a wedding. Guests are just being asked to refrain from posting the pics to social media. Its not a big ordeal. Nobodies civil rights are being infringed. If you are only going to the wedding so you can take pics in order to impress your Facebook friends with what a hectic social life you have then your just sad. If you go to a dinner party and the host asks you to dress smartly, you dont whinge and whine about it, you either stay home or do as she/he asks out of respect. This is the same thing. Respect the wishes of the hosts or stay at home.


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    #112
    username123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,484 ✭✭✭username123


    mrsbyrne wrote: »
    I think this is straying away from the topic in question.
    Look nobody is saying that people cant take pics at a wedding. People have always taken snaps at a wedding. Guests are just being asked to refrain from posting the pics to social media. Its not a big ordeal. Nobodies civil rights are being infringed. If you are only going to the wedding so you can take pics in order to impress your Facebook friends with what a hectic social life you have then your just sad. If you go to a dinner party and the host asks you to dress smartly, you dont whinge and whine about it, you either stay home or do as she/he asks out of respect. This is the same thing. Respect the wishes of the hosts or stay at home.

    How is it straying away exactly? A poster pointed out that images posted to social media are free for anyone to use for their own purposes. Im querying what that purpose might be and why anyone would have an issue with it.


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    #113
    SERCPRO
    Registered Users Posts: 150 ✭✭SERCPRO


    I think it's a good idea to ask them not to post anything.


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    #114
    rainbowtrout
    Registered Users Posts: 15,381 ✭✭✭✭rainbowtrout


    username123 wrote: »
    How is it straying away exactly? A poster pointed out that images posted to social media are free for anyone to use for their own purposes. Im querying what that purpose might be and why anyone would have an issue with it.

    Well the Facebook terms and conditions state that whatever photos you post on Facebook belongs to Facebook

    For content that is covered by intellectual property rights, like photos and videos (IP content), you specifically give us the following permission, subject to your privacy and application settings: you grant us a non-exclusive, transferable, sub-licensable, royalty-free, worldwide license to use any IP content that you post on or in connection with Facebook (IP License). This IP License ends when you delete your IP content or your account unless your content has been shared with others, and they have not deleted it.

    So basically once you put a photo up they can do what they like with it. How would you feel if Facebook used this sub licence clause to sell your wedding photos to some third party company for advertising? May not necessarily be wedding advertising...

    I'd prefer for them not to have that right to ownership of my photos.


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    #115
    mrsbyrne
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,228 ✭✭✭mrsbyrne


    SERCPRO wrote: »
    I think it's a good idea to ask them not to post anything.

    I think its the bride and grooms entitlement to ask that the photos not be shared and I this k its the guests obligation to respect that entitlement. Its also the decent mannerly thing to do.


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    #116
    username123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,484 ✭✭✭username123


    rainbowtrout wrote: »
    Well the Facebook terms and conditions state that whatever photos you post on Facebook belongs to Facebook

    So basically once you put a photo up they can do what they like with it. How would you feel if Facebook used this sub licence clause to sell your wedding photos to some third party company for advertising? May not necessarily be wedding advertising...

    I'd prefer for them not to have that right to ownership of my photos.

    Yes I'm not disagreeing with that point, I'm simply wondering what nefarious use people think internet strangers are going to get up to with their images. Is it just advertising?

    Personally I couldn't care less if pics of me were used by some third party advertiser because (a) I probably wouldn't know about it anyway and (b) for all I know people take pics in public that I'm in without even knowing anyway so I could already be in some image being used for something.


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    #117
    juliedxx
    Registered Users Posts: 27 ✭juliedxx


    My friend got married recently and they had a note at the front of the massbook saying that they kindly requested that guests respected their privacy and didnt post wedding photos on social media. I didnt think it was strange at all, its a curteous request and as far as I know everyone respected their wishes. Im sure they wouldnt have had an issue with guests posting pics of themselves. It is a bit much to see pics of the bride and groom on Facebook as soon as the ceremony ends. I wouldnt be too impressed if I was the bride.


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    #118
    twowheelsonly
    Registered Users Posts: 2,268 ✭✭✭twowheelsonly


    juliedxx wrote: »
    ...... It is a bit much to see pics of the bride and groom on Facebook as soon as the ceremony ends. I wouldnt be too impressed if I was the bride....


    As soon as the ceremony ends?? You should be so lucky!!

    This thread came to mind last weekend when a (crap) photo appeared on my feed of a groom waiting at the altar for his bride.

    Half the problem these days is that for some people it's a competition to see who can get their photos up first and if that means uploading while still in mass then so be it. At this time of year Communions and Confirmations are as bad.


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    #119
    hmmm
    Registered Users Posts: 11,205 ✭✭✭✭hmmm


    Too many couples think they are Bradd Pitt and Angelina, and want a wedding which is absolutely "perfect" (whatever that means). I've hated each and every one of those weddings. Asking people not to post photos to Facebook because they may be of "unflattering angles" is typical of that in my book.

    Your friends are excited to be at your wedding and some of them might want to be posting things on social media, you communicating a list of nitpicking rules to your guests is going to give you a reputation you're going to carry for a long time.


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    #120
    wrt40
    Closed Accounts Posts: 422 ✭✭wrt40


    username123 wrote: »
    Bit off topic, but what exactly would you be worried about your image being used for?

    I'll give you a very good example. Ever comer across online ads with a caption along the lines of "Mandy999 wants to f*ck you" and a photo of a pretty girl?


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    #121
    Gatica
    Registered Users Posts: 3,300 ✭✭✭Gatica


    hmmm wrote: »
    Too many couples think they are Bradd Pitt and Angelina, and want a wedding which is absolutely "perfect" (whatever that means).

    I really don't understand what someone wanting a perfect wedding has to do with anything. Surely no one wants a crap wedding?!
    hmmm wrote: »
    I've hated each and every one of those weddings.

    Well, fortunately, or unfortunately, if you will, that's not the B&G's problem. If you hate weddings, just don't attend them. Honestly, I think most couples want people at their wedding that want to be there.
    hmmm wrote: »
    Asking people not to post photos to Facebook because they may be of "unflattering angles" is typical of that in my book.

    As so many people on this thread have expressed, it's not all to do with "unflattering angles". It's trying to keep a special and personal day, well, personal. Shoot me if you will. They have invited a set number of friends and family to share the event, not the world and not the friends of friends.
    hmmm wrote: »
    Your friends are excited to be at your wedding and some of them might want to be posting things on social media, you communicating a list of nitpicking rules to your guests is going to give you a reputation you're going to carry for a long time.

    I think that's more the issue of the so-called friends though. I'd be happy to do anything my friends would ask me (maybe not jump of a cliff, but anything realistically normal), if it would make their day better.
    No one stopping you from posting pic of yourself dressed up on FB, if that's what you want. Leave the B&G out of it, surely it can't be that hard?


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