borderline personality disorder/bpd

emir27 wrote: »

I have a formal diagnosis of borderline personality and would love to hear form anyone else with this diagnosis. also from anyone who know of someone in their lives who have been diagnosed:)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EcJowTnmBjE

I have being dignoised with borderline personality disorder. It very hard to deal with unless you can get a friendly doctor who will help you.

Unregistered wrote: »

The biggest and most helpful thing you can do for someone like a friend who has bpd is to help make them feel safe and secure, i feel that a lot of the psychological distress and emotional distress comes from a lack of feeling safe and secure in yourself and your surroundings/enviornment. I have bpd and staying in touch with my feelings and trying to mother myself and self soothe give myself the right to feel better helps me a lot and i try to do that as much as i can and not just when my distress levels go through the roof and i can barely rememebr my own name.
People with bpd need understanding friends friends and family that can reassure them when they feel insecure and very wobbly. I dont self harm myself thank god but it is ruining my life and holding me back. Because it is a personality thing it affects all aspects of your life.... The biggest fear BPD suffers have is being abandoned and they will do anything to avoid feeling or actual abandonment as they deep down feel that there is something wrong with then or that they are BAD. in some way... I understand it, my bpd, but it doesnt help me feel better, and feeling better is what its all about isnt it?

I suffer from bpd and was lucky or not so lucky to attend a course which was done in conjuction with Trinity College and Belfast University, and when I finished I had some skills, but still find it hard to deal with certain things, I do feel insicure and find it hard to talk about it unless it is to follow sufferers.

for those of you looking for forums with others who suffer with BPD, I highly recommend Mental Health World forums: http://www.mentalhealth-world.org.uk/forums/

Ok this is all my oponion,but my feelings towards the professionals yes there the only ones that can actually help in the end,but your paying them to be there and to care in regards to a friend or family and the person themselves knowing they really care like!!

you ask of course but like the way it was often for me,someone asks me how am i,i reply fine,they ask really are you....yano like,id just send a text saying well hope your as well as you can be just thinking of you,,then theres probably a better chance of her hoping up like...i hate when my sister acts really happy around me when im always the opposite,its just the way she is but it makes me feel so differnt and jealous..

whatthefcuk wrote: »

hi guys dont know if im cutting in here but my psychiatrist said to me that i might have bdp and i researched it and im pretty sure that i do to be hoest.

im devastated! heartbroken but explains why ive never felt a core sense of self you know??

just anybody wanting to talk about anything not even related to this but anything mental health wise please pm it would be great to talk to someone about this, im 19 in dublin and just want to understand what other people are going through as well

cheers!

Hi, im 30, diagnosed 18 months ago, working with a psychotherapist, following cognitive behavioural therapy route. Have to say it is really helping. Reakon I have it min 12 years, but suffered from problems with my nerves from very young age, sniffing, got my adenoids removed at 9 years old, didnt solve the problem -suprise suprise Mam! Went to a few councellors from ages 9- 26. Grew up with parents or a mother who hated my father, they're still together! My father i think has aspergers or something like that with a intellectual disability, completely illerate and a few other issues in my childhood. Got pregnant in leaving cert year to a guy who i now know is bi -polar, and ended up in uk in abusive relationship which led me back home to eire at age 18. Suffered 6 bad months of depression while working part time, then went to college for3 years, parents practically raised my baby who is now 12. At 19, went out alot, drank alot, made a show of myself quite alot, slept around looking for affection, scared men off by being obsessed, lost friends through saying inappropriate things or getting angry, called Glenn Close by my nearest and dearest friend as a joke, i had never seen the movie, little did i realise it was so accurate, lost jobs from saying inappropriate things, black and white thinking, extreme visions of myself, from narcisstic thinking to suicidal thoughts thinking everyone would be better off without me, including my son who lived by then with just myself. No maternal bond with my son, just taking care of him coz society says i should, scaring him with my bouts of anger, depression. People who dont know me think I have it all, on my good days im quite pretty, bright articulate and engaging on my worst days, im ugly, fat, angry, depressed, confused, who would bother wanting to know me? On a lighter note, i have many more good days than bad now, changing my internal thought process, instead of having the "F**k it attitude, now I do examine if its worth the hurt i cause and inflict on both my family and myself?" Sometimes it is, more often than not it isnt. Hope this helps explains my bdp a little better

was wondering is anger or outbursts always a symptom as in if someone fits all the symptoms except anger is it something else?

saa wrote: »

was wondering is anger or outbursts always a symptom as in if someone fits all the symptoms except anger is it something else?

Hey Saa,
on diagnostic criteria, outbursts of anger are part of it. To be honest the best way to find out is going to psychologist or pyschotherapist for a few sessions. I have always known I different emotionally from my friends, i take things to heart much greater, need more affection and re affirming than most ppl i know but yet i sabotage most of my relationships coz i know they will leave anyhow. Well I did.... I am in a much better place now. The problem with any developed disorder is you can revert back to your developed natural reactions when faced with a traumatic event, a break up, argument, perceived threat or insult, critism. BPD is just a defense mechanism ppl develop emotionally to not get hurt.
The problem is it effects all / most of your relationships, family, friends, work colleagues etc. The best part is that you can and will get control of it if you find the right help for you

brokenwings wrote: »

:eek: where do i start?? im 26yrs old. i was diagnosed with bpd at 15 which i am told is too young but they labelled me!:mad: i have been to hell and back a million times over. so many hospital addmissions, for suicide attempts, for a lot of self harm... alcohol, drug abuse... my parents had no choice but to throw me out because things got so bad. i have been in the services 11 years now and it is still a daily struggle. i have been lucky in some ways being able to see counsellors, some who have helped, (some who have not ). my parents are not well off so i have been attending public services, when i was twentyone i was offered or ordered to attend dialectical behavioral therapy (after, psychologists, cbt etc. ). i went along, got evaluated... for the 1000th time and they accepted me straight away. i was one of the the first to do it :rolleyes:... it involved group therapy, once a week and a therapist, who i also saw once a week and had daily contact with. it was heavy going and in the first few months i had done alot of damage to myself, like i was fighting this and didnt want the help. i completed the group and continued one to one but slipped further back, i still dont know why... they let me come back a second time. things are not as bad as they used to be but if i had the chance to start again, i wouldnt be so stupid and id fight for and through it... thank you for taking the time to read this.

My therapist said to me recently after 18 months of CBT of which i was convinced i was 80% cured!!!, when people with BPD finally reach a place of understanding the condition and awareness of how it effects people in life they start to feel really bad, down and depressed and sad(this happened to me recently!). When it finally hits them how the ppl around them feels so bewildered and confused and hurt because of all things the person with bpd has done to them to try to "avoid being abandoned", a path of determined dogged self destruction( I can vouch for that!), the person with bpd will start to modify their behaviour to stop hurting other ppl but when it is working, when they are controlling those emotional impulses then they come up against something, be it a small thing or an important thing they will slowly start to slip back into their BPD ways because its so much easier.
Guys its easier to be BPD than Non BPD - being BPD is hard, a tough emotional rollercoster but guess wots tougher? Controlling the urge of jealously, rages, screaming, depression, anxiety, sickness,giving the silent treatment, saying sorry even if you dont mean it. It is so hard but it is worth it!!! I said to my therapist that the one thing I wouldnt change about BPD is it heightens my senses and my feelings. My therapist sought to agree to disagree on this one. His last sentance to me last week was ( quite a doctor phil moment but go with me on this one!)
"People with BPD experience extremes of emotions, black or white thinking.
"Did you ever consider that for all this time, you have never actually experienced the correct emotion and level of emotion for each situation you've ever encountered for life?" This statement blew me away!

Im like HELLO???? You couldnt feel more emotion that I do, nobody I know feels as deep as I do but I think that is his point. Non BPD ppl do feel emotion but at an appropriate level, everything in my world is all white or black. From now on I wanna bring on the grey!!!!give each situation appropriate levels of emotion, it will be a learning curve!!!